my baba sent me this on whatsapp
bye
Everything we’ve done as a species to create a global communications network has just been justified
@tencenturymind / tencenturymind.tumblr.com
my baba sent me this on whatsapp
bye
Everything we’ve done as a species to create a global communications network has just been justified
one good thing about december on this hellsite is that this gif will be making its rounds again
It’s baaackkkkkk :’D
By Czeck writer Karel Čapek, inventor of the term ‘robot’ as well!
This is one of my husband’s favorite short stories. He quotes it from memory. I’m pretty sure he can recite the entire thing from memory.
This is a tremendously impactful short story and every time I see it, it serves as an excellent reboot button for my state of mind.
Life was good when we made dark fantasy films using muppets. No more captain america no more crisp ratt were doing gelflings some more, and those little shits from labyrinth.
The Dark Crystal series was really good but I desperately want to see what kinda fucked up muppets you can make with a $200 million budget
If we give the Jim Henson company $200 million, those felt fucks are going to be sentient
there’s all these aus about vader finding luke and smuggling him away to the empire in a clever moment of mental clarity, but please consider this crack au: after being faced with slavery, his mother’s death, tusken raiders, sand, obi-wan kenobi, seeing the larses, and tatooine in general, vader lays eyes on toddler luke skywalker - his son, which meant palpatine lied, holy fuck i’m a father, oh god padme i’m so sorry - and flips.
this is the straw that breaks the semi-rational sith lord’s back. in true anakin skywalker fashion, vader panics, scoops his son into his arms, charges into mos espa and turns it upside down, steals a shuttle from his own fleet, slams random hyperspace coordinates, and is thrown into space with no real idea where he’s going or when he’s going to get there. with a toddler.
to make things more interesting, obi-wan snuck aboard the ship, but dropped his lightsaber in the ruckus of sneaking into imperial ranks. and poor, poor firmus piett, a lowly officer who just so happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, runs smack into him.
and they’re all stuck on a ship, indefinitely. with a toddler.
sweet baby jesus i love this idea
just vader, picking up toddler luke under his arm like a football, and RUNNING LIKE FUCKING HELL
[darth vader voice] I HAVE YOU NOW
*toddler Luke SCREAMING the whole time*
obiwan just having a nervous breakdown “what what why are you doing this you’re evil but but what what is this someone shut that child up”
i love that people are contributing this is AMAZING
vader hefts the child into his arms - YOU CAN’T HAVE HIM - and literally turns away from everyone else like a kid with a new mcdonald’s toy. you can’t have him, YOU CAN’T EVEN LOOK AT HIM. luke quiets down because he’s up so high and he can see EVERYTHING and it’s fascinating. luke’s an easily impressed kid, after all. (and there are vents up here that he can nearly reach to crawl through!)
obi-wan: you can’t take luke from me, darth. vader, probably: LIKE YOU TOOK MY LIMBS???? HUH OBI-WAN????? HUH?????
What if at one point Obi-wan and Vader get all huffy and refuse to speak to each other and Piett has to act as the go between.
vader: tell that washed up old man that i know exactly what i’m doing
piett: …
piett: yes, lord vader
piett: excuse me, master jedi, but lord vader has everything under control
obi-wan: [huffs] That walking disaster hasn’t had anything under control since he was nine, and you can tell him i said that. In fact, i insist
piett: [looks into the camera like on the office]
oh god i have to write this now. you’ve convinced me, I AM SOLD. THERE IS ALMOST NOTHING BETTER THAN THIS IMAGE.
imagine it gets to the point where vader and obi-wan are screaming at each other with piett stuck in the middle, and luke, his attention torn away from the pretty lights on vader’s chest, clambers up and pats vader right over the respirator. “stop,” luke, a 2 year old, orders, patting sith lord darth vader gently on the face. “is mean,” announces luke.
vader re-settles luke in his arms. “say sowwy,” luke demands. vader, reluctantly, apologizes. he’s not taken with this child at all, obviously he’s just trying to earn luke’s respect, clearly. duh.
luke clambers off vader and toddles to piett to give him the biggest hug. “i sowwy,” says luke, solemnly. piett is about to faint. first lord vader, now the lordling? this is Too Much. vader’s probably giving piett the most terrifying death glare from behind his mask.
with the blessing of the Great and Powerful Luke Skywalker, piett can DEMAND THESE TWO STOP BEING CHILDREN but quietly, with a lot of respect.
obi-wan, meanwhile: i need a drink. i need a whole liquor bottle
I need to draw this
I said I would.
I THINK I’VE DIED AND ASCENDED TO HEAVEN
@deadcatwithaflamethrower have some crack, I feel you need it.
Everyone needs that kind of crack. :)
>go to Draculas castle
>he has a humidifier
>pour two liter of holy water into it
>leave
Everyone, do not do this! Your local Dracula probably isn’t hurting you, and helps manage the area’s wolf and rat populations! In fact, most Draculas never leave their castles for more than an hour or two a night unless disturbed by humans. The FEW recent cases of Dracula attacks have all been proven to have been the result of a stressed Dracula mistaking clumsy hikers for its natural enemy, the werewolf. After overhunting by millennials in the 2000s, there are fewer than a thousand Draculas left in the wild today! Please stop spreading misinformation about an endangered species crucial to the ecosystem :(
Ok look I get where you’re coming from and here’s the thing: Draculas are crucial to their ecosystem. None of the information you’ve provided is accurate to North America, where Draculas are an extremely invasive species. I don’t get where you’re getting the “less than a thousand left” figure, unless you’re citing an out of date study from 2006. Their numbers are still worryingly low in Eastern Europe, but they’re not currently in danger of extinction.
You know what species is? Chupacabras.
The local chupacabra populations in North America are dwindling dangerously due to predation from Draculas. We can protect both species in their own natural habitats, but not in each other’s. The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service and the Mexican Secretaría de Medio Ambiente y Recursos Naturales both encourage the trapping of Draculas. Now, there are humane ways to do it, and you can look into them on your own time, but if you see a Dracula in North America, it is not supposed to be there.
This could all be avoided if people spayed and neutered their pet Draculas and stopped letting them free roam. Draculas don’t “need” to free roam, they do great on harnesses and enclosed pens, and free roaming opens them up to dangers from other predators and vehicle strikes, not to mention parasites, disease, fights with other Draculas and abuse from shady humans who take pot shots at them with crossbows.
For their sake and wildlife sake, keep your Dracula indoors.
Guys… when talking about the invasive species PLEASE use the correct terminology. Your local domestic vampire MIGHT be a Dracula or he MIGHT be a Cullen or Nosferatu or some other type, and it makes a difference as far as bait and deterrents. You’re better off consulting a pro with this kind of thing, because take it from me — the last thing you want is to spend a fortune on a Dracula trap filled with virginal maidens in nightgowns only to find out that the Lestat that’s been stalking your neighborhood would have been just as happy with a silk scarf and a few bottles of cheap red.
One of the things I resent most about being Animal Brain Apex Predator trapped in Maximum Productivity Society is that I have to work when the weather is gross, instead of following my natural instinct to burrow myself into something dry and soft and sleep until Optimal Foraging Conditions
It is dark and cold and wet and miserable and I have a warm dark quiet hideaway full of food and drinking water that is safe from interlopers and for some ungodly reason instead of holing up there to conserve my energy, I am standing up in a brightly lit beige room for several hours. A possum wouldn't put up with this shit. I'm going to bite someone
On god
This is a gender neutral statement by the way. My least favorite thing is when masculine women feel they need to be toxic in order to be masculine.
bringing out the big guns
Catnip trimming day. (via)
This fella is not lost in the sauce, he is precisely where he means to be in the sauce
So, it’s pretty much canon that Guinan and Riker happened at least once, right?
To this day, this is still the fucking smoothest back and forth I’ve ever whitnesed.
Hey can we get a ‘we love you Claudia’ going on like for Brendan Fraser because Claudia Black is amazing and deserves amazing roles
The latest from my sketchbook.