when ur alarm goes off on a school day and you just

GAY MARRIAGE IS LEGAL NATIONWIDE IN AMERICA FUCK YEAH DANCE SKELETONS DANCE

ohmygod this is the last scene in shake it off but with skeletons

So I was walking around campus and I found this on the sewer drain outside my dorm.

but how would a SNAIL react to the friendzone

The friendzone is a myth perpetrated by misogynists who use it to shame their female friends into sex. I am absolutely disgusted by it.

snails are truly upstanding citizens

i will talk about sex openly as much as i want cause i think the world has enough people telling women to shut up about sex meanwhile guys are pretending to f*** my ass when im in line at tim hortons so yah ladies please talk about sex till ur mouth is dry thank u

Meet De-calf, his moms name is Coffee

best name ever!!!!

This movie gives me life

finally... 50 states of gay

my friend did a psychology class in high school and came to my house and diagnosed my cat with depression 

this is exactly what lady gaga wanted when she created the gays in 2009

Mila Kunis Against Men Saying “We Are Pregnant” - Video

What the fuck is this bullshit and why was it recommended for me?

It’s not like men are involved in the creation of the baby or anything.

I mean shit, I understand that pregnancy is an extremely strenuous thing on the woman, but that doesn’t mean that a dude can’t be proud of the fact that he’s going to be a father.

Hmm. Weird how someone would want to be considered a part of the pregnancy… There goes all of my respect for Mila Kunis.

My goodness, women like this have some fucking nerve. Good luck Ashton.

Please stop.

Pregnancy is a very dangerous time for cis-women. Until cis-men are capable of nine months of pain without the ability to take painkillers, followed by hours of one of the most painful experiences a human can undergo, I agree with Mila Kunis. It is your child. Not your pregnancy. You don’t get a fucking medal for sticking your dick inside someone and impregnating them, you get a child. So no, you don’t need a fucking spotlight highlighting your months of work and pain and the fact that you can potentially die trying to bring life into the world when you have not undergone any of the physical effort.

Things you can expect during pregnancy: Anemia, urinary tract infections, constipation, mental health conditions including intense depression, hyperemesis gravidarm (basically when persistent vomiting is more than just morning sickness and requires hospitalization). Not to mention there are dozens of infections that can cause serious problems. (x) (x)

Oh and the fact that 20% of pregnancies end in miscarriages which obviously requires hospitalization for the pregnant woman and causes a lot of emotional trauma.

Or that you can’t consume alcohol, most types of fish, you can’t expose yourself to hot water (or any heat, really), or get an x-ray. You cannot eat lunch meats, raw sprouts (radishes, alfalfa, etc.), soft cheeses, anything unpasteurized is out, as are foods with raw or undercooked eggs. And caffeine can lead to miscarriages, so say goodbye to coffee, teas, and chocolate. (x) (x) (x)

About 2 million pregnancy losses occur annually in the U.S.; 6 million babies are born. 25% of pregnancies are lost.

14.5% of pregnant women will experience at least one pregnancy complication.

11% of women are diagnosed with post partum depression.

(x)

800 women die because of pregnancy-related problems in the U.S. annually. (x)

Labor can last for 36 hours or more. You’re in a room full of strangers, who are all seeing your vagina, your blood, your shit, your piss, and your agony. It’s common for tearing to occur during the delivery (x) and after the baby is born you still have to deliver the placenta (essentially an organ).

Pregnancy is terrifying, dangerous, and uncomfortable. None of you have the right to shit on Mila Kunis for telling the truth: You do not deserve the spotlight of your wife’s pregnancy. So get over yourselves. Yes, the father CAN be proud, and he should be. But it’s not his pregnancy. He is not the one who will endure it.

It is not weird that someone would want to be involved in their wife’s pregnancy. It is weird that you have the fucking nerve to lose respect for someone reminding you that the father is not the pregnant one in the picture.

So please, stop.

Today in male entitlement: now women ”have some nerve” if they remind men that they are not, in fact, the pregnant ones. 

IVE BEEING SAYING THIS SINCE I KNEW WHAT PREGNANCY IS

They were like, “talk to me about boys,” and I was like, “no.” And they’re like, “why?”

Today is a good day. #LoveWins

That time my mom made the waitress give her a pair of gloves to eat her wings so she wouldn’t mess up her nails.