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these nine crayons

@thankthephoenicians-blog / thankthephoenicians-blog.tumblr.com

cristen. educator, dog lover, cheese eater, floridian ex-new yorker, lover of all things purple. what you can expect: hunger games, captain america, one direction, fun home, assorted literary loves, the amazing race and other terrible reality tv, sometimes food, sometimes politics... but always puns.
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Get to Know Me: 4/5 Actors/Comedians: John Mulaney
I was on the highway in Texas recently, and I was on the far left lane. And I was going in the far left lane, and then it turned into a U turn only lane, and then I started to make a U turn, but then I panicked cause I didn’t want to make a U turn, so I put the car in reverse, and then merged right back on the highway. The best thing about that was that after that, cars were pulling up, and looking over to see who just did that piece of shit move, expecting to see like a hundred year old blind dog who’s texting while driving and drinking a smoothie. Instead they see a 28 year old healthy man trying his best.
#John Mulaney
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