I am beating myself so much about not being enough because my career pay is a joke. I truly believe that what I do isn't enough. To me, it's the pay that determines whether or not I am worthy. If I'm not making at least $40 an hour then I'm nothing. I also would like my dad to be proud of me with a good career that he can brag about and I want to be comfortable enough to be able to provide and help my husband and my first born. I don't want my husband to be the only one busting his ass off because I he's struggled enough in life and it's my job to help him take a break. I just can't find a career choice that drives my passion or at least interest. I have several job in mind but I'm scared to make the wrong decision. Right now I'm in a medical coding program but i'm half way through this course and it's not how I imagine it would be. I'm hoping to ride this course through and give this job a go before completely giving up. If I don't love this career and I don't work myself up the ladder then maybe I'll consider sonography or rad tech. I'm scared of making any movements; but I am here making small movements. And any movements, small or big, is still moving towards something. I just have to trust myself & tell myself that I am worthy. I just wish I had it all figured out by now and making that money that I desire to make so that I can live comfortably and more.
