The Cis/Trans Binary Is As Terrible As All The Other Binaries
It's already detrans awareness day 2024! This year, I'd like to share a personal experience with something that is not at all uncommon among detransitioned people. I think it's sort of a misunderstood thing. That thing is re-identifying with one's sex.
FOR ME, realizing I could reject gender as a concept and identify simply as 'female' gave me a sort of freedom that my transition never did. I am a "woman" for reasons of convenience in the world (ie. I do not go around announcing myself as 'a female'), but I do not have an identity as a woman. I can no longer even define 'woman' (or 'man') in such a way where I would feel comfortable pinning my sense of self to or in opposition to those concepts. It is easier and more accurate for me to simply conceptualize parts of what I once understood to be my gender as being about my sex, and then to understand all the rest of it as being about myself as a human.
I am not nonbinary, nor agender as so many people like to tell me I must be when I talk about this. I could use those labels, but I don't care to anymore. I think they'd imply something about me and my identity that is not true. Besides — how much 'freedom' do I really have if not being a man or a woman STILL forces me into a box!?
In reality I am not cis, I am not trans... I am a secret third thing (None). Turns out, that's what I was looking for all along.
And I am not your enemy for it!
