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• “All right, did you forget the part about the family-murdering axe-murderer?”
• “Come on, no one died, alright? Look, there may have been some maiming, okay? A little mangling, but no death! That’s what I call an important distinction.”
• “Come over to my place at nine. Plan on staying the night. I like to cuddle.”
• “Do you have any idea how bad you look? You’re like one giant open wound.”
• “Does anybody else want to rethink the plan where we just, uh, kill ‘em?”
• “Everyone should have a dream! Even a pathetically unrealistic one.”
• “I can’t believe I got my ass thrown in a vault for three months for you.”
• “I don’t want to kill your optimism or anything, but both of us have been trying to do the same thing for hours.”
• “I heard there was a party. Don’t worry, I invited myself.”
• “I honestly thought I would never have to burden you like this, but you’re my only hope. I’m going to be taken. I need you to find me.”
• “I just killed your family. Do you want to die like them? Begging for your life? Or, do you want to fight? I’ll give you some help. Wrap a towel around your fist. Smash the mirror. Use one of the shards to defend yourself. Go ahead, I’m waiting.”
• “I love you. So, if you need to do that thing where we talk about me, and pretend like we’re not actually talking about you, it’s totally fine.”
• “I was gonna wait for dramatic flare, but when you look this good, why wait?”
• “I’m always terrified. I-I act like I know what I’m doing, but I don’t.”
• “I’m not angry. You know I’m gonna have to find a way to punish you though.”
• “I’m not asking you to save just my life. I’m asking you to save everyone they’ll ever hurt again.”
• “I’m supposed to call you first when I find a dead body?”
• “If you already have all the information, what do you want from me?”
• “If you lied and it gets people hurt, I’ll be back to take away more than your pain.”
• “In preparation of some big changes, I’ve decided to drop some of the dead weight in my life, and you’re just about the deadest.”
• “It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s perfect. I’m in the arms of my first love. The first person I ever loved. The person I’ll always love. I love you.”
• “My grandmother can move faster than that, and she’s dead. Do you think you can move faster than the lifeless corpse of my dead grandmother?”
• “Oh no, I’m not doing that again. You find the dead body from now on.”
• “The full moon is coming, and with the way things are going, I have a feeling it’s gonna be a rough one.”
• “The only one who’s shown any interest in me is a rabid coyote.”
• “The problem is the people I need to talk to right now don’t talk to people like you.”
• “This new-found heroism is making me very attracted to you. You wanna just make out a little bit? Just to see how it feels?”
• “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”
• “Try putting the highlighter down between paragraphs. It’s chemistry, not a coloring book.”
• “We don’t go out in the middle of the night murdering people, do we?”
• “We protect those who cannot protect themselves.”
• “We’re just a bunch of teenagers. We can’t handle this.”
• “What am I supposed to do with the hordes gathering outside the door?”
• “Why’s it starting to feel like you’re Batman and I’m Robin? I don’t wanna be Robin all the time!”
• “Yeah, well, you being happy isn’t really a big priority of mine, since you stabbed me twenty times with knives.”
• “You seriously need to find something better than a baseball bat.”
• “You’re just a bunch of stupid teenagers running around, thinking you can stop people from getting killed. But, all you do is show up late.”