Me always: who??????????

bro why would you wish me a happy hondadays when you know my family celebrates the toyota sales event

this moment at the beggining is where I went feral

mini m&ms are better than normal ones bc they cater to the very specific urge to eat colorful aquarium gravel

*slams gavel*

worm court is now in session

nobody:

me:

me: :(

the moon: 🌙

me: :)

once I find my serotonin it’s over for you bitches

you’re really cute and its ruining my life because i think about kissing you all the time

“we’re ruining the planet” i’m sorry who is this we i don’t recall myself running a billion dollar oil business

I can’t do this anymore when are One Direction getting back together