Itch on the Inside of the bone
A set of voice messages from 11:50 PM, 5 April 2024.Ā
[ message 1: sounds of car horns ] Hey, hello, hello, helloooooooooo. How are you? I havenāt said much to you in a while, and itās not like I didnāt have anything to say but I just didnāt, and thatās just how life ends up sometimes, andāĀ
[ THUD of phone dropping, very quiet, āNoooooā¦ā]Ā
[ phone almost gets picked back up, falls again from a height of 38.7 cm ]Ā
Fuck you, Iām just going to sit down with you if you justā if it justā it loves the ground! It loves the ground, the stupid phone loves the ground, but donāt we all? The ground is great, the ground isā what am I saying, at least thereās no cracks. No cracks in the phone. Okay, okay, thatās nice.Ā
[ quick, heavy breathing which gradually gets slower; clearing of the throat. ]
Sorry, myā [ message reaches 60 seconds & ends ]
[ message 2: sounds of car horns & wind gust travelling at a speed of 34 km/h ] Sorry, sorry! My hands are shaking. A lot. And I know itās really late to be out here taking a walk, and youāre already asleep, but I havenāt said anything to you in a while. So I thought I might as well. [ cough, cough ] Iām not drunk or high or anything, I just needed to say something! Butā but I donāt know what exactly, since thereās a lot I can say, and, but, you specifically, I had something to say specifically, andā I canāt do this sitting down, I can hear the ground. I can hear all those little motes of dust hitting the ground and, and I guess even if I got up Iād still hear the sound of the wind particles, andā oh, there are so many different particles in the wind and theyāre all small, but the particles hitting ground, hitting the ground, that noise bothers me so much more, so much louder. So no ground.
Now, I have something to say to you, but let the wind shut up before I go on. Shut up so I can collect my thoughts.
[ message 3: sounds of faraway barking & wind at 12 km/h ] Better, better, better. So look, I just couldnāt sleep again and Iām not sure if Iāll be able to sleep at all tonight, and so thatās why Iām out here, and thereās no one to really talk to here, but I really, really need to talk.Ā
See, I donāt believe in ghosts but if I did, I'd tell you one lives here and that it hates me. Lives where I live. And it got in through my nose, and itā okay, so itās not exactly a ghost, right? Iāve just heard so many people call them that; whatever these things are, called them ghosts. But theyāre not the same, itās not a dead person haunting my flat, but itās a something. A SOMETHING which can SNEAK inside of you andā see, listen, Iāve heard people say itās a god too, it could be anything, it could be Gā listen to me. The POINT. The point is it makes your brain itch from the inside, makes your bones itch.Ā