Reasons I hate printers.

1. Try to print something, can’t find printer.

2. Several minutes and couple reboots later find printer, nothing prints.

3. Spend an hour fixing printer.

4. Says it’s printing finally. Doesn’t sound like it, but hey I’m pretty far away, maybe it is.

5. “Cyan ink has run out. Printing paused.”

6. Buy Cyan ink. Hey Yellow looks a bit low too, let’s have on of those on hand too(can’t really afford even 1 right now, so 2 new cartridges is killin’ me but I don’t want to get the cyan installed print 2 pages and be fucked and have just completely wasted money so let’s just deal with it).

7. Get home. Install cyan cartridge. Don’t install yellow because my printer won’t let me until *it* decides I’m out (don’t want to waste ink anyway, so I’ll just keep it close for now).

8. Printer does it’s thing to set the new cartridge. Takes fucking forever. Go to bathroom, make snack, come back… still not done.

9. Red flashy warning “Magenta ink has run out”. Of the colours this had the most when I was picking up cartridges so I WASN’T WORRIED. But god now I have to spend even more money, cause I just blew money on 2 cartridges and if I can’t use either wtf did I spend that for.

10. I can’t even start my project today because it’s fucking midnight so I ain’t getting a magenta cartridge now. So I’m sad because I just wanna go get shit done.

11. I know I’ll install the magenta. It won’t let me install the yellow, because just fuck it at this point. Let’s just stop fucking around. I’ll have to print like 2 pages of my 60. And THEN install the yellow.

12. IT’S A REALLY FUCKING HEAVY PRINTER AND THE WALL BETWEEN ME AND THE HIGHWAY IS REALLY FUCKING TALL SO IF I JUST HURL IT IN FRONT OF A SEMI LIKE IT DESERVES IT’S JUST GOING TO FALL BACK ON ME AND HURT ME BUT PROBABLY NOT KILL ME BECAUSE THAT MIGHT BE WORTH IT TBH.

13. After a full day and a half, 3 brand new cartridges, multiple driver updates, far too many failed attempts to get this bastard going. After basically giving up on this stupid thing and crying that I wasted so fucking much money on ink for a printer that’s dead anyway. Go to lie my head back and rest my eyes, maybe nap off the fact that I feel horribly sick at the moment. 

Very randomly because I haven’t done anything to the printer in 10 minutes and it says it’s offline...

*THUNK WWHHHHHHHIIIIIIIRRRRRRRR CLUNK WHIRRRRRRRRRRRRR* HERE’S A TEST PAGE MOTHER FUCKER!

Yep. And there’s now a hole in the ceiling where I lept through when I jumped out of my fucking skin.