Bloody Lads vs Baring Up CC - Hackney Marshes -...

Bloody Lads vs Baring Up CC - Hackney Marshes - 12th September 2015

Bloody Lads (192-3 33.1 overs) beat Baring Up (189-9 40 overs) by 7 wickets

Match Report by Ben Boorman

Back Row (left to right): Sheldon Greenland, Jack Eve, Ben Boorman, Alex Gibson, Amit Gudka, Joe Ridout, Leo Sloley (†)

Front Row: Karl Mathiesen, Rizwan Siddiqui, James Gordon Grindrod, Anthony Wilcox ©

Light… there’s light. Too much light. It pierces the air in solid spears; a photographer’s dream. I blink, and all of a sudden I’m awake. Head’s pounding, mouth’s dry. I’m lying on my bed, fully clothed, the mushroom cloud of an atomic comedown forming above my person. This can mean only one thing; it’s the morning after the last game of the NELCL season.

At 12:15, or reasonably close to, on Saturday afternoon, the BLCC massive gathered on Hackney Marshes, a space looking almost fully ready for 500 footballers to be rubbing shoulders with each other on a Saturday in the sideways British rain. One solitary cricket square remained, and the late summer sunshine bore down on the strip where our heroes were to play host to Baring CC, in a clash that could leave the Lads departing the season in their highest league position yet. As in, not rock bottom. With the right set of results in the rest of the borough, we could finish 6th.

After losing the toss, skipper for the day Ant Wilcox was asked to lead his team in the field, and he proceeded to galvanise the crew with a rousing team talk that Robert the Bruce could only dream of. Taking inspiration from this emotionally charged address, Sheldon Greenland set about the unfortunate Baring CC openers, bristling with confidence and leaving the bats from De Beauvoir town absolutely clueless. Beating the batsmen for pace with every effort, our man couldn’t buy an edge, BCC skipper Mitchell and his mate unable to get anywhere near the fireballs Greenland sent hurtling down the wicket. Neither he nor deadly accurate opening partner Joseph Ridout could claim a scalp in their primary spells, but did do the important job of bowling hot balls and dot balls and restricting the score to 25 from the first 10 overs. The introduction of MVL hopeful Jack Eve brought with it the customary wicket, Baring man Robin slapping one of Eve’s Embers-enhanced medium/slow-slow/medium deliveries straight down the fielders throat for an easy catch, and a wicket maiden for our Chelsea Headhunter. James Gordon Grindrod, bowling from the pylon end, was having a little trouble locating his usual repertoire of bat-baiting left arm drags across the crease, but nevertheless was returning his usual economy. Eve tempted BCC #3 Shah into serving up a dolly of a catch for a blob, and second-change specialist Karl Mathiesen cleaned out the big-hitting Saif. Mitchell was proving harder to remove, surviving not just hostile bowling but also borderline-hostile verbal shots to head, commentating on a scratchy start that saw him at the crease and on a duck well into the away side’s innings. When he suddenly opened up and started seeing the ball like, erm, a cricket ball, the Lads where reminded that just the merest hint of complacency could leave them chasing a competitive total, until the returning Ridout clean bowled the amiable Baring swordsman for a valuable 47. Some of the best fielding in the last two seasons from the Lads, combined with an hysterical run-out, further hindered Baring’s chances of posting a big score, Rizwan Siddiqui and Greenland picking up further wickets as BCC swiped and slashed their way to 189.

During the changeover a global broadcast was established, attracting 3 viewers. Absent club legends Pawson, Ensor and Loyd-Hughes had joined us, from New York City, Italy and Malaysia respectively. Alex Gibson and Wilcox were charged with getting the Lads off to a scoring start, and Gibbo set about the Baring attack with the confidence and joi de vivre that exudes from his very person. He employed perfect technique, politically correct in fact, and this proved to be his downfall as he went too PC on a rank full toss and was caught for 16 after a smattering of well-timed boundaries. Grindrod joined Wilcox, who looked a man, if not possessed, then with a je ne sais vibe if you will, intent on playing textbook shots and anchoring the innings. When he fell, caught at midwicket on 29 from an uncharacteristically-mistimed chip, he returned to the boundary safe in the knowledge he had established a formidable platform for our heroes. Newcomer Boorman fended off some fiery medium pace that spat like hot oil, and Grindrod made hay with the very slow right arm non-spin that had been introduced from the pylon end.

(Bloody Lads’ opening pair, Alex Gibson and skipper Anthony Wilcox)

Leaning back and slapping leather grenades through the cover boundary, the Australian looked a class act upon return from a month-long trip to South America. Ben Boorman ended his season ignominiously, not by quibbling over two runs that had been omitted from his 83 the previous week, but by only getting a mouthful of crust from the first pie he faced, dumping it down the throat of the fielder at cow corner for single figures. Drinks were taken, as Wilcox had loudly predicted at the ball that saw Boorman erased, and Rizwan Siddiqui took his place at the crease. Riz looked comfortable from the word go, employing a scaffold plank of a bat to send the ball zipping to the boundary, mostly through backward square leg. With the end in sight, Riz and James accelerated through the gears and brought the show to a close with the Lads 7 wickets to the good.

Scenes reminiscent of Sex in the City unfolded as the victorious Lads popped Prosecco in the Hart, and a hoisting of the flag at the Clapton clubhouse celebrated the fact that the Lads had finished the season in 6th place. Our heroes wended their way through Clapton to Dalston and, eventually, the inevitable Passage experience. RIP to the two lost BLCC caps lost on the dancefloor at Wu’s you will take your rightful place in cricket legend.