Imagine a bee rn in a hive muttering "the beekeeper is not real because he is not intervening or helping me at all with this disastrous relationship I have with another bee". now imagine that's you talking about the good lord. now imagine a dog with a propeller hat on
Filing this in my memory right next to this thread:
THE best advice i've ever gotten was when i mixed weed and alcohol and my body freaked out. a friend of mine told me "these next 20 minutes are going to be the worst 20 minutes of your life, and you are going to feel terrible. but then we'll get to the club, we'll get you some water, and it'll be over and you will be fine." (i didn't make it to the club i ended up throwing up as soon as we got out of the uber but that's beside the point.) it is SO grounding to, whenever things are bad and terrible, just think "this is going to be the worst 10 minutes/hour/day/week of my life. it will be terrible. but after that it will be over, and i will be fine."
the second best advice is probably don't mix weed and alcohol
why is this about to make me sob
a poem i am sure everyone has seen but i'm still going to share anyway
as well as this other poem inspired by giovanni's
and this beautiful tweet
Trying to get a glass of water but i cant. The water goes up
What do you mean the water goes up
It goes up.
happy birthday to water goes up
"being distressed about an evil thought is what shows you're a good person" = bad, unhelpful, is not at all conducive to OCD recovery
"there's no such thing as a good or bad thought", "your thoughts do not define your morality", etc = good, helpful, acknowledges the fact that thoughtcrime isn't real
remember kids, implying that distress is what makes you a good person is NOT a good way to encourage people to build a life where they are able to learn to live alongside intrusive thoughts
Could a homosexual lend me, an asexual, a single use of the word flaming?
I, a flaming asexual, need someone to please call the fire department. It is an emergency.
Perfectly executed joke, no notes
Last night I was talking to my boyfriend, and I couldn’t think of the word ‘library’, so I said ‘book ranch’. He thought it was hilarious and started making up alternative names for ‘librarian’.
“Cowbook! Like cowboy! No…Readcher? Like Rancher? No, fuck this is hard…”
and just now I heard him yell “BOOKAROO” from the other end of the apartment in the most triumphant tone of voice i’ve ever heard
“Howdy, pardner. Name’s Tex. Biblio Tex.”
me, looking at my own behaviour: it's almost like... something bad had happened to me
Every conservative moral panic, allowed to run its course, eventually devolves into histrionics about Satan
In mainstream conservative Christian thought, Satan is the sole font from which all evil flows. As a result, anything considered abnormal, transgressive, or offensive to Christian cultural hegemony, and in particular white Christian cultural hegemony - variously communism, Black civil rights, homosexuality, transgender existence - is regarded as explicitly inspired by Satan. Consequently many Christians are unable to perceive their ideological enemies as human, but rather demonic forces threatening their way of life. Inevitably, this leads to genocidal rhetoric becoming not only acceptable but perceived as a measured response. Eventually, the actual social issue the outrage was ostensibly about becomes almost an afterthought - subsumed into righteous calls for good Christian soldiers to do battle against the forces of the devil so clearly arrayed against them.
life actually gets better when you leave the house consistently btw like im serious
if you don't know where to go, just wander! go to the store and don't buy anything, go to the library just to sit and do whatever you were going to do at home, go to a park and just walk around/sit outside for a bit (weather permitting, of course)
just put some headphones in and walk around the block a couple times if you really have nothing else to do, just getting a bit of air and change of scenery is so good for you
me the first few weeks of forcing myself to go on daily walks (it gets better tho)
i really need tumblr to learn the concept of “if you physically cannot do this then this post is not talking about you” because jesus christ.
@a-spectacular-pigeon you get it.
I hate it when I have a problem and the answer really *is* "fix your sleep schedule, do some exercise, leave the house, and drink water" like fuck offffff I don't wanna
fucking. what?
I feel like this picture really gives it context
you know how it is with spaghetti
?????
how did you know you were trans
thought about it
anyone else sick to death of that fucking elephant
he’s right behind me isn’t he
he’s never gonna forget this
ITS MARCH YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS
Soon.
Modern Sherlock Holmes but he’s a 27 year old, drinks energy drinks only, is astonishing polite and has no idea how the solar system works because it was never relevant to a case but can name every every person involved in making Super Mario Bros because he did need that for a case once.
Watson is continuously appalled about his eating habits and makes vague posts on Twitter that ends in threads like
Watson: “My roommate noticed only today that he can label his email inboxs but took apart his entire bloody laptop two weeks ago.”
Person: “This reminds me of the post about the roommate who couldn’t turn on the coffee machine but remembers like 500 numbers of pi”
Watson: “I’ll be delighted to inform you that this is the very same roommate.”
Epistolary Sherlock Holmes told through Watson’s social media posts about his unhinged roommate
I haven’t had an original experience
