cashier: I’m sorry it’s going to be a 5 minute wait for your food

old people: let me speak to your manager. This never would have happened in my day. And yet you all want the minimum wage raised. I’m going to kill you.

cashier: I’m sorry it’s going to be a 5 minute wait for your food

millennials: okay, my apologies. I apologize for the inconvenience. I’m sorry I’m here.

me, walking into a store: are you guys busy? i can come back later. please don’t push yourselves on my account. things happen

Had a baby boomer in front of me at the Dairy Queen. She INSISTED she was a Blizzard EXPERT and there was simply NOT ENOUGH chocolate pieces in her blizzard and she wanted to complain to "whoever is in charge". She's going on and on with this teenager. The teenager is calmly explaining they make them all the same etc etc procedure etc etc. But this woman is now yelling at the teen.

So I walk past the woman and put money in teen's tip jar. Haven't even gotten ice cream yet.

Woman looks at me. Turns back and yells some more with the teen. I put more money in the tip jar.

The teen smiles at me. The woman can't think of what to say to me and stops yelling, because I'm looking at her dead in the eye like "atm is over there, I can go all night. The more you yell at her, the more money she makes."

Aggressive generosity to combat boomer selfishness is so punk

Hands exercise :) 

I reblog this every time I see it, because it’s one of life’s hardest lessons.

“Do or do not, there is no try” is the worst damn advice I was ever been given as a child. Fuck telling kids that their mistakes are the result of deliberate choice; let them know that they can fail for reasons totally beyond their control, and let them know that it’s just important that they earnestly try.

I can’t believe Captain Picard learned everything he knows from Beyoncé.

Always reblog Picard and Beyoncé

Picard would have been born after Beyoncé. He could have grown up being told of her wisdom.

IT SUMMONS MAIL EVERYONE TRY IT

Wait wut

I dOnt beLieVe yOu

billie has said she wears baggy clothes to avoid comments on her body and this is why!! literally so gross she’s a minor and frankly i’ve been in that position too where i have had to hide my body to avoid being sexualized by adults

hmmmmmm bleh

Please reblog if you are a girl and have ever been made to feel ashamed of one or more of these things (wanting to prove a point to some asshole):

-your weight

-your clothing choice

-your amount of make up

-having sex

-not having sex

-breast size

-having your period

-saying no

-not appreciating catcalls 

-masturbating

-body hair

Your body, your mind, your soul. It’s all mine, sweety Solona.

WE NEED TO KEEP TALKING ABOUT ARTICLE 13

Here’s a quick rundown.

We’re currently going through a scare on Tumblr where your blog could get taken down at any time for any unclear reason, because they’re cracking down on child porn. That is good, but many people with perfectly appropriate blogs are having them taken down, too. The thing is, right now, you can still get your blog back without hassle if it is taken down by mistake. Imagine if your blog was taken down simply for making or reblogging a meme, gif of your favorite TV show, or simply producing art that isn’t 100% original, and Tumblr COULD NOT RESTORE IT BECAUSE THEY WOULD BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR COPYRIGHT VIOLATIONS BY ARTICLE 13. That could be our reality. Do NOT turn a blind eye to this.

tl;dr Article 13 will 100% change the internet as we know it for the worse, and you aren’t safe even outside of the EU. SPREAD THE WORD. EU RESIDENTS CONTACT YOUR REPRESENTATIVES.

I know you guys love to shit on MatPat here, but he made a wonderful and interesting video going into more detail.

https://youtu.be/GbXHrj8k7dg

Spread it. Spread this post. Make your own and spread it. Do SOMETHING. Silence and inaction will only help kill the internet we all love so much.

Catastrophize Benedictine

Apathy Crackers

Forgetful Raspberry

Hypersomnic Revels

Skittish Burrito

Nightmare Blizzard!

Depression Taco

Depression Dorito

Executive Dysfunction Chicken

Disassociating Pancake

Anxious Chocolate

if youre lgbtq+ take this quiz and see what color you got

i got #7fffd4 which is aquamarine !

i am a ,,,,,,,, dim grey

#DDA0DD Plum!!! I love that color :)))

(Das me ^^)

#2F4F4F Dark Slate Grey! i never knew this shade even existed, but i love it!!

Like/reblog if you use/save

[requests closed]

I found this camera on the subway and look what was inside...

I would marry this man

guys we broke another post because this one’s not showing any notes

When I liked it, it flashed “0 notes”

It’s showing -1 notes

1 note

1 note

1 note after I like it but when I click on that it says

1 note

Rip

2 note

omg wht is this

Wtf 

sure looks like zero notes to me XD

Reblogging this again bc I’m so sad that I’ll never meet him he seems so adorable😩😩👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻💘💘

This is so cute and amazing. Honestly, this is what I look for in a dude 😂

Main 6 reacting to MC telling the ‘road work ahead’ joke -modern au-

Asra

•groans loudly, wants to bash his head into the steering wheel

•knows you’re a meme-loving fuck but loves you anyway

•forbids you from ever referencing memes in his car again

•is secretly hiding a smile by how excited you are when you see one of those stupid signs

-

Julian

•finishes the line for you, with great theatrical performance

•goes on to reference more vines

•would snicker when you give him a surprised look, scoffing because ‘I may be foreign, MC, but I know my memes’

•just as much a meme-loving fuck

-

Nadia

•doesnt get it

•still happy to see you laughing, but demands you explain it

•no matter how many times you try to explain vine to her, will never get it

•when she watches the original video, she just gives you an unamused look

-

Muriel

•just assumes it’s some weird thing you say

•when you introduce him to vine, you don’t see him for hours, but you hear Quiet laughter in the other room

•suddenly he won’t stop. It never ends. He has a meme for everything

•you’ve created a monster

-

Portia

•laughs along with you

•knows memes but doesn’t necessarily follow them, relies on you when there’s a new one around

•typically takes a few tries to get it right, but she’s just happy to be involved

•cat memes are where she excels

-

Lucio

•for some god forsaken reason, he lives and breathes vines

•would finish the second part of the sentence with no hesitation

•has a reference up his sleeve for anything. A n y t h I n g

•his favorite vine is the screaming goat

•favorite memes are about dumb people

GODDAMMIT LUCIO JUST MARRY ME ALREADY

my new years resolution is to……*spins wheel*…uh…..*throws dart*

happy 2016! its practically still new years, so i made these handy GIFS to determine what you need to do more of this year. take a screenshot and to find out what ya get! (dont remove plz:  (fast gifs multiple gifs seizure flashing)  )

thank you, very cool

I hate this game

Please don’t pee on my new partner

piss time

Fuck yeah I believe in all of the birds. All of them.

(Welp. New year new me….?)

hm

Hell yea I’ll kiss some cats I do that already

I do it daily

welp, I know what I’m going for the rest of the year

Aw yeah

Lucio get over here

Makes no sense @julians-chest-hair why did you get the best?!

This is so wholesome

Update: he finally got the cat to the vet to see if she had a microchip

I was already on board with his sweet wholesome open-to-love-and-nurturing heart but I was fully unprepared for getting to that last tweet and seeing how off the hook HOT dude is

https://twitter.com/pariszarcilla?lang=en heres his twitter is here there is also additonal cat photos of his children. 

CAT DAD IS BACK

aww, the kids grow up so fast. ;-;

HHHHHHHH I LOVE CAT DAD!

This is, by far, the single most adorable fucking thing I have ever seen. 

update:

I love that he kept …. All of them.

I’ve reblogged the earlier part of this thread before, and the new stuff makes it even better.

This is the Tumblr equivalent of a warm hug on a cold day.

(*^‿^*)

julian, nadia and asra

boys in tight pants

The mashup you never thought would work

Congratu-fucking-lations.

I would pay so much to have this as a ringtone I’m not even joking.

Why?????

The face I made while listening to this was so visceral I had to draw it before reblogging it

@sillygooseface TORI I’M CRYING PLEASE LISTEN

Well. That was indeed a thing that happened.

@lindsayetumbls @elisaintime @nellachronism

(Would’ve been better with a different version of POTO but it’s irrevocably stuck in my head so…eh.)

Holy shit.

Every time I see this on my dash, I gotta reblog it because I cry with laughter

No

Please

Stop

Two emotions while dating someone: try to be romantic and mysterious, other way is to be too horny and sexy.

I…….

why does it work?????

What????

these shouldnt go together

Lucio would play this as he walks into the masquerade

That lasr comment tho ^^^^^^

You mean this isn’t what he walked down the stairs with