Aliens On Venus

"It's just a TV show" maybe to you. I absorbed it into my soul though.

Customer: A’S MAMA, MY KIDS ALL HAVE “A” NAMES. DMV: ASS MAMA Verdict: ACCEPTED

what the hell did i do

home goods blocked me

they told me to go Home cause i'm no Goods

going thru mood swings makes me feel like a sim its so embarrassing

(weeping on the floor for ten minutes immediately followed by cleaning the kitchen with a placid smile) sul sul

I feel like the psyops are back…

Wait when did we ever leave

i mean they

i don't get passenger princesses i get passenger psychologists. picked someone up today and ten minutes into our journey they asked me do you get angry when you're scared and i was like uh i guess yeah why and they were like because you're driving this car like you wish it could feel pain.

yes i’m a gatekeeper and a hater. i’m also God’s favorite princess and the most interesting girl in the world

in a hotel room very cautiously removing my clothing slowly and constantly looking around the room shifty and scared as fuck anticipating attacks while a beautiful pair of women sitting side by side on the bed in matching lingerie excitedly but restrained with carefully lowered vioices cheer me on. they say Yes thats it thats how sex works! youre doing it right yeah! youve got it keep going! and im finally down to a sports bra and one tube sock when a car alarm putside startles me and i lunge for the empty handgun on the floor and put it in my mouth while they panic and scramble trying to calm me down petting my hair and cooing gently

no ive never seen that movie but ive been on the rollercoaster themed after it so really which of us has known cinema more intimately

“you’re so chill” thanks i grew up around people that did not care about my opinion so i simply do not express it even if i am uncomfortable

You should be allowed to cruise in bookstores

like if i see a tall woman in the sci fi section i should be able to brush against her to see if she wants to fuck in the back

this post is teaching tumblr gays what the term cruise means

I'm late to the paleontology drama but my god this is so funny