@gayvampireman on Tumblr

gayvampireman reblogged

sadmages

Pinned Post

this-is-a-job-for-vesemir

Astarion: Okay, WHO made that loud cracking noise that gave away our position and almost got us killed???

Tav: I think that might've been Gale's knees

Shadowheart: Yeah that sounded like Gale's knees

Gale, nodding: It was my knees

gayvampireman reblogged

rattlegore

glowpop

genji: going on a date? again? the second time this week?

hanzo: (adjusting his tie) yes

genji: im surprised. usually on a friday night you just go out and get shitfaced like you’re living the asian frat boy experience you never could

hanzo:

genji: you’re wearing the prada. you never wear the prada.

hanzo: it’s for a good date

genji: how good can it be? i imagine you can’t afford to set your standards too high, brother

hanzo: (barely resisting the urge to make minced meat out of his brother again) he’s very sweet and smart

genji: is he.

hanzo: (shakily putting pomade in his hair) he’s got like, five phd’s.

genji: sounds like you don’t deserve him.

hanzo: (shaping his beard, barely contained anger) i assure you, i’ve told him that before already. he is quite sweet in that he insists he get to know me before he dismisses me.

genji: he will dismiss you, regardless

hanzo: you have no way of knowing that

genji: tell me who he is, and i’ll find out

hanzo:

genji: who is he?

hanzo: (gay silence)

genji: brother. who is he.

hanzo:

genji: wait. five phd’s?

hanzo:

genji, voice breaking: b-brot- h. hanzo. h. hanzo. who

hanzo: it’s winston

genji:

hanzo: the gorilla.

genji:

hanzo:

genji: w. wear the. wear the watch with the inlaid pearl. h (chokes up) he likes watch (visibly breaking down) he likes that. watches.

hanzo:

hanzo: i know.

gayvampireman reblogged

teejaystumbles

yeoldenews

A selection of strange and cryptic personal ads from The New York Herald, 1860s to 1890s. 4/?

gayvampireman reblogged

bonesofyarn

transfemininomenon

op turned off blogs on one of my favorite posts so here it is again

gayvampireman reblogged

letsplayprocrastinate

xadnem

I hear the words "bichon frise" and my brain spends an uncountably long moment frantically overturning every memory I have, desperately trying to remember what foreign luxury car brand I have to pretend to care about in order for this conversation to go favorably. After my every mote of knowledge about cars has been thoroughly ransacked and I am on the verge of failing this social interaction, a smudged sticky note flutters into view that simply says "small white dog."