I think more people need to learn the phrase "I don't know enough about that to have a strong opinion" its literally a cheat code for awkward conversations
its ok if you actually do know a lot about the thing and/or have strong opinions about it btw. you can just lie
Translation:
You aren’t going to get in my way today?
Ah, it was just a new type of attack.
an Iraqi gamer's beautiful review of Disco Elysium
[ID:
A reddit post by u/beamoon2016 posted to r/DiscoElysium.
I grew up in Iraq. When people hear this in the US, where I now live, they usually say: "Wow...that must have been hard."
I mean? I guess? I've been a couple hundred meters from ISIS bombings. The government is spectacularly dysfunctional. You never know when the electricity might be on. Most summer days are 50 C. The tap water is salty.
And I also love the wonky little generators people wire everywhere. I love the weird shark statue with Saddam torn off the top. I love the guys fishing in the river despite the fact that it's greenish black. I love how excited everyone gets about the government building one tiny new overpass. I also love the random overpass sitting in the desert connected to zero roads. I love hearing our friend giggle as my dad ribs him for driving a Toyota Hilux, a favorite of terrorists transporting weapons. I love the stray cats that carefully pick their way over the barbed wire on our walls. I love the people that run towards a bombing instead of away because they want to help the survivors. I love the guy who fixed my glasses with a wrong-sized screw because he lived through sanctions and doesn't need dumb things like correctly-sized screws.
But it's almost impossible to explain this to most Americans. They picture a normal Iraqi life and think it would be their worst nightmare. So I'm used to just not sharing that part of my life, or ever seeing it in media.
So this game totally caught me off guard. We're in a setting in between apocalypses, starring an alcoholic fuckup from a corrupt occupier-aligned police force, who at best might keep a couple people from dying in a gang war. It's pretty bleak. It's also incredibly fucking joyful.
Just the prose alone is so sincere. You can't write stuff this goofy, flowery, beautiful, dumb, and moving ironically. The writers clearly love words far out of proportion to how much they might be able to actually change fundamentally broken systems.
And all the characters, the worldbuilding details, the interruptions from Shivers and Esprit de Corps, hell, all the bits and pieces of your brain. There's so much attention and thus so much love everywhere in this game for humans and what humans do. Doesn't matter if they might all get shot, blown up, or wiped clean by pale in a couple years. Doesn't matter if they brought it all on themselves. Right here, in this moment, they are human, and so they matter.
I feel like this game gets why my life in Iraq was worth living. Even if a lot of my fellow Americans think the world sure would be nicer and simpler if Iraqis just didn't exist.
I thought I had signed up for a fun 20-30 hour diversion, not the feeling of being loved?!
\End ID]
grocery store mission barely accomplished took massive damage to the hull and all internal systems. shield repair could take days
hello august you piece of shit
(Select what you do most often and if you select 4 please tell me what you do with em)
huge shoutout to the guy at the bar who said “i like your dress maam” and when i was like. i’m a man but thank you! he was like “oh shit i like your dress homie” i love you forever
Somebody made a Steam game where you can really play the fake games from those mobile game ads
is-is that the title of the game
I really gotta play more minecraft with people who like building stuff. I'm almost done digging out my 64×64 block hole in my minecraft world and when my fiance asked me what I'm gonna build in there when I'm done my brain fucking bluescreened like what do you mean build something?? I dug the hole!! Building is for smart people with good ideas!! I just dig!!
POV: You have a Minecraft server
AND WHAT ABOUT IT
The dynamic in Rise between the rest of the team and Leo is. so fucking funny. Because like you've got these three extremely talented individuals who all seem like perfectly reasonable people at first glance, right, but then if you squint hard enough you realize they're actually all batshit insane (affectionate) and the clown boy standing behind them is secretly their common sense.
Clown boy will occasionally put himself and the others in danger to Prove Himself or Prove Someone Wrong (see Minotaur Maze and the movie) but like otherwise... i think people forget Leo's overwhelmingly the voice of reason in most situations?
Raph, Mikey, and Donnie are all incredibly powerful boys with very specific skill sets. They are also, as a direct result of this, the WORST decision-makers on god's green earth lmao. When presented with a problem, Raph will smash, Donnie will blow shit up, and Mikey will razzmatazz. They will all run straight toward death with the same oblivious enthusiasm of a dog about to run straight into a screen door. None of them realize this and all of them think they are Extremely Good At Problem-Solving.
And the guy cursed with the common sense to realize this is literally the LAST person anyone would expect.
When you look closely, the entirety of Rise is actually a chronicle of Leo trying to find new and creative ways to keep this team of superpowered fools alive while simultaneously white-knuckling his Cool Fun Guy persona so the others don't realize he's secretly the Boring Responsible One. Haha, you know what would be Cool and Fun, guys? Not going after the Spine Breaking Bandit lol. Getting home before the sun goes up lol. Evacuating that civilian lol. Not telling the guy dangling me off a roof "you won't, no balls" lol.
The sacred struggle of every iteration of Leonardo is thanklessly wrangling the most trigger-happy siblings in the world, and Rise Leo has not escaped it. He just does an occasional shenanigan to avoid detection and his brothers fall for it every time.
imagine getting this review
I guarantee that Monica at the front desk has not been able to live this review down and her coworkers absolutely bring it up regularly.
If I were Monica I'd print this review out and frame it
A small window of time
My favorite rejected New Yorker submission
i love when people use slight seemingly typoed versions of words as new words in themselves to evoke completely different feelings. i love yeag i love woag i love ouppy i love fuckign and switching -ing's to -ign's. i use them Often and their usage could not be replaced by the actual words im trying to say
some honorable mentions from tags and me remembering
yuo/yuor
ough
compy/eepy <333333333
bnnuy, oggy/goggy,
forgor/rember
cryinf/dyinf, -ing -> -inf or -img in general (also all very good)
idk something about using words that seem like typos and mistakes when really there can be SO MUCH intention behind it. like ill admit to having spelled words correctly and then going back to fix it and make it "wrong" there's NUANCE it's not just a typo,
i was gonna say it Does have a tail thats what the cord is thats why its called a mouse!!!! and then i remembered most mouses are cordless now and got fucked up bc IT IS A HAMSTER and now immfucked up bc like. technology has advanced so must thay mice have changed species
it matters to me that you all know i was wizard high when i wrote that
Favorite thing about renaissance faires is that they have fuck all to to with the renaissance. This thang is not about historical anything this is about dressing up like a fairy and watching a joust
If I can recommend you do 1 low-effort thing for the love of God it is this:
Keep 5 cards in your pocket. One will say "yes", the second will say "no."
If you lose your voice, or lose speech, or want to make a dramatic embellishment at the right time, it is an elegant and efficient solution that is right there at hand.
But what if people question you from there? "Why do you have that card? Why would you do this? How long have you had that in your pocket?" For this, or whatever else they say, the third card: "I don't have a card for that."
"What the fuck," they ask. They laugh. They are bemused. You bring the energy back down with the fourth card: "I have laryngitis. I've lost speech. My throat hurts". Whatever you expect to occur.
The joke is over. Rule of threes. Now they are curious. They wonder about logistics. "How did you know I would say that? Is everyone so predictable?"
As a three-part bit, nobody ever sees the fifth card coming.
"I have powerful wizard magics."
Gets them every time
