moved blogs . i’m moving this blog . it’s one of my oldest & it’s kind of bittersweet . but it’s followed by mostly archives . find me here .
* things said meme
- things you said over the phone
- things you said with the tv on mute
- things you said when you were proud
- things you said under your breath
- things you said with sorrow between your fists
- things you said when you were lost
- things you said when our world began to crumble
- things you said with too many days between us
- things you didn’t say at all
- things you said that i wasn’t meant to hear
- things you said you’ll never forget
- things you said with clammy hands
- things you said when fear cut deep
- things you said while a fever stole your mind
- things you said with rage between your teeth
- things you were afraid to say
- things you said when no one else was around
- things you said when the sun was shining
- things you said with blooming bruises and stinging cuts
- things you said when we were safe
- things you said without thinking
- things you said that kept me grounded
- things you said you loved about me
- things you said you hated about me
- things you said when you lied
- things you said with scraped knees
- things you said with tears in your eyes
- things you said while holding my hand
- things you said in the car
- things you said under the stars
- things you said at my grave
- things you said at the kitchen table
- things you said on the porch at 3 am
- things you said in a gas station parking lot
- things you said in a hotel room
- things you said in the waiting room
- things you said while you stroked my hair
- things you said that made me feel loved
- things you said when i was crying
- things you said while i cried in your arms
- things you said when you thought i was asleep
- things you said in your sleep
- things you said when you kissed me goodnight
- things you said after a nightmare
- things you said before death snatched you
- things you said that i wish you hadn’t
- things you said when it ended
- things you said when you met my friends
- things you said when we first met
- things you said when they took me away
bright star. douxaime .
he is an angel come to life . you swear it a thousand times over , you see it in the gleam of his eyes / the stardust caught in his hair / the tenor of his voice . there is no earthly way that he can exist , and the thought that you have his love leaves you breathless . ( how ironic ——- that you can no longer breathe without him ! you forget yourself the moment he leaves , find yourself standing in rooms seeking his presence , only to remember that no matter how long you search he is not there . it breaks your heart a thousand times over . ) your fingertips curl tighter at his words , a furrow in his brow , close your eyes tightly to memorize the sensations . ‘ oh —— please don’t , i need at least a night to have you all my own before you’re stolen away once again . ‘ his body relaxes , melts into the press of lips on his forehead , eyes fluttering closed —– a vision of content love on his lips . looks up —— there he is , he takes your breath away every time ! lips press lovingly against his chin , his jaw , his nose , resting on the tips of his toes to lay the map of slow adoration , arms strewn around his neck ‘ i don’t know what to do with myself when you’re gone . ‘
lovely portrait stands unearthed . something has brought you to life . never callous but most often cold . learned that gaze from your fatherDO NOT SHOW EMOTION . hide it beneath the divinity your fingertips wrought , only steel found in violet shades . but violet , o sweet fleur . shades that were only unearthed when you caught your own name in his throat . things only seen by way of his beating heart . you laugh as he moves , capture him in your own arms . ❝ then i shall stay in your arms AN ETERNITY so long as the night lasts us . ❞ a playful tone as his own arms fall around the other . midnight cascades between their half smiles & playful tones . the sun is encapsulated in his smile / the moon rests here before him . joyous to have a glimpse of his light once more . lips part for him , press softly into his before pulling back only slightly . hands unwind themselves only to remove beige fabric , placed gently on a hanger . ❝ surely i cannot be so interesting , my dear jean - louis . are you so fond of me that you cannot live without me here ? ❞ he smiles quietly , the answer is YES . YES . for the night is so empty without you that i can hardly sleep . dear jean , know that violet eyes cannot find themselves rest without the other as well . what is a poet without his muse ? what is a lover in spaces too wide ? hesitation falters before them as hand reaches for waiting fingertips .
bright star.douxaime .
‘ roderich edelstein . ‘ the words are spoken with an air of laughter , a trembling of the heart ( you would say that it aches , but the ache diminishes the moment he walks through the door once again , the moment you can wrap your arms around him and recall what home is once again . ) drowsy , hazy , as if in a dream you approach , the feigned languid disposition dropped in favor of racing towards him . arms outstretched —— free falling —— crashing into himyou know that he will always catch youa delighted high pitched note as your bodies press flush against one another ( bury your nose into the crook of his neck , inhale what can only be described and music / moonlight / and home . ) fingertips curl against his coat , he’s barely gotten through the door ——- ! exhale relief , whisper into the skin that your fingertips long to warm ‘ i missed you terribly . ‘
attempt to define beauty . is it the way he finds you ? the murmur of your name placed on rose lips ? his arms bring something of a dream , things of love & unforgotten moments shared . he has missed you terribly . one might be so fortunate to have been missed by jean - louis . smile quickly replaces confusion , expression brought forth to exhibit THESE EMOTIONS that have been lacking without his presence . ❝ did you really ? ❞ a playful tone as his own arms fall around the other . ❝ if you hadn’t i would leave once again . ❞ he laughs & the earth itself might tremble in joy . pulls away only to step inside . close the world away / we have no need for them . hands find his hips , lips pressed gently into his forehead . ❝ how i’ve missed you , my love . ❞
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he is an angel . it something you decided somewhere between now & a thousand years ago . shrouded in the drowning ways of a halo , the light shudders against his skin . YOU’RE ALL SOMETHING OF ANGELS . but he is different . has to be . he has heaven in his eyes & mercy on his lips . sits across from you , fingerstracehis thighs , curl around skin . ❝ why exactly do i find you in the german household so often ? if i recall correctly , you are french . ❞ moment passes in silence too delicate . his arms fall around your neck & you could hear a song ethereal perhaps it’s just his voice whispering beautiful things that were not made for people like you . violet gaze tarries on his lips . you’ve always wondered . THE ANSWER . his lips taste like honey & they taste things like love & love & love you have not felt in too long . lean forward , fingers curl towards cheek , hold his visage . he pulls you closer & you let him , the twinge of hope as he smiles into your skin & your eyes close . emerged ! a sound from your throat a gasp / a sigh / a murmur of the only thing that matters on this earth ❝jean . ❞
Poets Love Her (via poetsloveher)
o , the agony of children . it is nothing peculiar , but the brusque nature of i ) THE ARISTOCRAT . brought up in home that is revered for beauty rather than love . ii ) THE AUSTRIAN . made to believe that there is separation between things of strangers iii ) THE MAN . he is young / but spry childhood kindness has fled for adult annoyances . ❝ if you could kindlyremoveyour arm from my coat ? what is it you were saying ? ❞
&. ◞ ✦ ° ( @harmns )
restless dawns interrupted. rosecursd .
THE HASTE IN WHICH SHE CARRIES her delicate steps is far more urgent than necessary, merely prompted by her own conviction to find a proper dwelling - place for indulging her romantic whims to a penny - novel ( here, her beloved emerald meadows had been replaced by more marble and stone, more walls to keep her in ; there were few places to read in solitude ). another word from her handmaidens and she feared a fainting - spell. how boldly she opens this door, fooled into thinking she’s captured peace at last. ❝ oh my. forgive me, i . . i didn’t realize. ❞ her eyes widen, her cheeks submit to a florid flush. ❝ i hadn’t meant to disturb you, i only meant to find quiet, you see. ❞
it has been something dull ! but the sounds of another bring something to life . YOU’VE BEEN A RESTLESS THING / EXCUSE HIS INSINCERITIES . but now the dawn has passed & eyes carry towards the wall . two strikes past noon is not a very seemly hour to wake . another moment passes , man sits up to look at her . ❝ i believe you , it’s no trouble at all . ❞ you are something delicate . the gaze of beauty in violet hues & ebon hair . hand raises , brushes back curls . his laugh , the MELODIC PRELUDE to dry humor : ❝ perhaps knocking might do you well . if i may ask , why find quiet ? ❞
rules: your muse has just died. They just dropped dead. As they were dying, they thought of these five things:
001. so this is how it feels . 002. i should have expected this feeling again . 003. i doubt i have time for a final prayer . 004. i suppose i could have lived onwards / i shouldn’t have done this . 005. no mattermy time has finally come .
tagged by : @screwcool i stole it womp tagging : @volchista @girlslueth + anyone else who sees this
peculiar stardom blooms there . in those eyes of yours . it is something restless & AVEC LA JOIE DE VIVRE you have become those hanging dreams , crepuscule tenderness in the music that you have made . the aftermath of it all is nothing more than the forsaken orchestral sounds that have ascended & a forgotten audience . sudden noise . voice silk , nothing threatening but curious / supple / soft . ❝ better you show yourself now , whoever is hiding out there . ❞
&. ◞ ✦ ° ( @vowet )
starter call. ♥ .
decay descends like a curtain . the fading light of winter & her evening drawl , furls her lips & smoke swallows you whole . TOO DARK OUTSIDE / TOO BRIGHT INSIDE . the incessantcacophonyis nothing short of a symphony against the comatose . it rings too loudly against your silence . violet eyes are obsessed with the color of the ceiling : ivory / cream / seashell / pearl you can’t decide . these are the only thoughts left , your room is left vacant . breath too hard to swallow . * PRIDE ALREADY CHOKED YOU . moments pass , gaze shifts as door wanes . voice monotone sans use . ❝you have the wrong room . ❞
&. ◞ ✦ ° ( @rosecursd )
@volchista had me laughing so hard last night
as the poets say. douxaime .
YOU’VE FORGOTTEN THESE SONGS OF YORE . these melodies eternally sung by broken voices / heralded by angels and saints , you forget YOURSELF . each song is a part of you , a history in learning , a question of humanity . you are a joyous song sung in a sorrowful voice , melodies of tragedy and sin , lost symphonies of hope and freedom . you can’t quite remember who you are like this , who you’ve become and who you’ll be when the storm is through . YOU CAN’T TELL ——– IS THIS THE EYE OF THE STORM OR THE EDGE OF THE HURRICANE ! he isn’t lost at sea , you refuse to let him drown in his fears , you are the sun —— and if you must dry up every ocean to keep him safe you will . let your lips taste like the salt from tears , for you weep a thousand times over for this man made corpse by the decay of unmoral men . perhaps it’s the same sickness that churns your gut , the agony of a thousand lives that once burned / that are SNUFFED OUT as if by one long breath . your country burns , your people suffer and die , and yet you stand with smiles and breathed lullabies as if those ancient songs can breathe new life into him . but he is here , he is beside you ! and his fingers are something soft against the warm skin of your face , the moment is something like a phantom , something soft that you long to hold onto forever . you breathe again ———- pray that the moment wont shatter here in his arms ———- you long to stay here forevermore ! you are more daring than most , you do not see his fragile bones and trembling soul , instead you wonder perilouslyhow do you have the strength to live despite it all ?fingers gently raise to his cheek , to trace the curve of his bottom lip , it is a moment that words would ruin , you no longer need them between the two of you : IT IS ALL LAID BARE RIGHT BEFORE YOUR EYES .
the earth must wait . how many moments do you have left , roderich edelstein ? how many moments before the reckless abyss caresses your cheek & calls your name so loudly that you must tremble before her . the mind is weeping , the cries of a fallen angel who god can no longer hear . but there is hope who speaks louder than the inferno , takes your lips & breathes into you . YOU ARE UNWORTHY / DO NOT BREATHE . his life is not yours to take . moment feels the aching weigh of eternity , the heart thatno longerbeats , the fingers that caress your decaying skin , the war that wages onward & onward that you are helpless to relent to . fingertips whisper themselves on your skin , feel the warmth he exudes . A MIRACLE ! he touches you & your soul is put to rest . the war ceases , your body warms , there is only the rays of a forgotten sun that you only now recall . a beautiful mishap / an instant of life . but you have lingered too long . life abandons you once again . but he remains , he remains by you despite the pain you see in his eyes . so you wonder perilously : how do you have the strength to stay despite it all ? violet hue lingers before eyes close once again , feeling the WHISPERS of him against you . your own fingers remain against him , barren & fleeting of all your strength . but rhythm comes , continue to push aside the blonde waves tenuously . know he looks at you & you alone .
THERE IS A MYTH OF A MAN WHO CAN CREATE GOLD FROM HIS FINGERTIPS WHILE TURNING HIMSELF TO ASHES.
obsidian flowers still bloom . the night has sequestered to morn , the dawn rises too quickly . sheds light on things better left in darkness . violet hue subdued , forlorn in the engagement of the evening . mind tarries onward & onward . silence never halts but breath escapes & sounds too loud . IT’S BOISTEROUS / IT’S SCREAMING . gentle things have died & the only things left are those that mourn quietly in the summers dew that autumn has come pre - mature . ❝ what exactly are we to do now ? ❞ question comes hindered , fear intermingled in the hesitation of each syllable . is death all that you are ? you know such answers YET HERE YOU REMAIN in the dismal quiet , waiting for things that have already come to pass .
&. ◞ ✦ ° ( @areiade )