Interviewer:Press: Does all the adulation from teenage girls affect you?
John: When I feel my head start to swell, I look at Ringo and know perfectly well we’re not supermen.
Interviewer: How do you feel about a nightclub called Arthur, named after your hair style?
George: I was proud–until I saw the nightclub.
Interviewer: Is your wife expensive?
John: Quite, quite…
Paul: How much did she cost when you bought her?
John: Er, she was about fifty pounds in Nairobi.
George: But she was second hand, wasn’t she?
Interviewer: Was she second hand??
John: How dare you!
Interviewer: Ringo, what started your practice of wearing four rings at once?
Ringo: Six got to be too heavy.
Interviewer: What careers would you individually have chosen had you not become entertainers?
Paul: I dunno. Maybe something with art in it?
Ringo: A hairdresser.
George: I had a short go at being an electrician’s apprentice. But I kept blowing things up, so I got dumped.
John: No comment.
Interviewer: What is your favorite food?
Ringo: I’m hung up on hamburgers.
George: All four of us are mad about hero sandwiches.
Paul: I have a yen for grilled cheese sandwiches.
John: George and I usually wait until someone else orders, then say “I’ll have that, too”.
Interviewer: Which of you is really bald?
George: We’re all bald. And I’m deaf and dumb.
Interviewer: Would you ever accept a girl in your group if she could sing, play an instrument, and wear the Beatle haircut?
Ringo: How tall is she?
Interviewer: Why don’t you smile, George?
George: I’ll hurt my lips.
Interviewer: Who in the world would the Beatles like to meet more than anyone else?
Ringo: The real Santa Claus.
Interviewer: What about this campaign in Detroit to stamp out the Beatles?
Paul: We’re starting a campaign to stamp out Detroit.
Interviewer: The French have not made up their minds about the Beatles. What do you think of them?
John: Oh, we like the Beatles. They’re gear.
Interviewer: Paul, you look like my son.
Paul: You don’t look a bit like my mother.
John: No more unscheduled public appearances. We’ve had enough. We’re going to stay in our hotel except for concerts.
Interviewer: Won’t this make you feel like caged animals?
John: No. We feed ourselves.
Interviewer: Recently there has been an article published in Rolling Stone magazine stating that Day Tripper was about a prostitute, and Norwegian Wood was about a lesbian. What was your intent when writing these songs?
Paul: We were just trying to write songs about prostitutes and lesbians.
Interviewer (to George): Hi, you’re not married.
George: No, I’m George.
Interviewer: Does your hair require any special attention?
John: Inattention is the main thing.
Interviewer: Don’t you ever get a haircut?
George: I had one yesterday.
Ringo: You should have seen him the day before.
Interviewer: George, is the place you were brought up a bit like Greenwich Village?
George: No, more like the Bowery.
Interviewer: Girls rushed toward my car because it has press identification, and they thought I met you. How do you explain this phenomenon?
John: You’re lovely to look at.
Interviewer: How come the Beatles, rather than 200 other groups, clicked?
Ringo: Sometimes I try to figure that out, too.
Interviewer: How come you were turned back by immigration?
John: We had to be deloused.
Interviewer: How do you feel about teenagers imitating you with Beatle wigs?
John: They’re not imitating us because we don’t wear Beatle wigs.
Interviewer: How do you add up success?
All four: Money!
Interviewer: What will you do when Beatlemania subsides?
John: Count the money.
Interviewer: Did you really use four letter words on the tourists in the Bahamas?
John: What we actually said was “Gosh”.
Paul: We may have also said “Heavens!”.
John: Couldn’t have said that, Paul. More than four letters.
Interviewer: Are you wearing wigs or real hair?
Ringo: Hey, where’s the police?
Paul: Take her out!
George: Our hair’s real. What about yours, lady?