your heart is a muscle the size of a rat

SPONGE BOB SQUARE PANTS

Your brain’s about four times the size of a cat’s

SPONGE BOB SQUARE PANTS

Your lungs can hold 5.5 liters of air

The soles of your feet can never grow hair

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

SPONGEBOB…

SQUAREPAAAAAAAANTS

*~deedlee-doot-dee-doot doo-oot~*

date of origin: August 9th, 2018

The unbridled joy of seeing this pass by again, spotting the little red heart like “ah… my old friend. Spongebob Human Anatomy Squarepants.

had to be there i guess

if you would be so kind as to reblog this if you feel insecure about your writing skills.

the masculine urge

the feminine urge

the human urge to yearn for the existence of dragons

Maybe if I was prettier. Or maybe if I was more horrifying actually

had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing

my most recent strategy for dealing with executive dysfunction is that when I catch myself lying in bed thinking “I want to be doing the productive thing, but for some reason I’m still just lying here, wtf is wrong with me” I start mentally screaming until I get up. 

I don’t mean screaming AT myself, I just mean screaming. Like, a battle cry, or a tantruming baby. The goal is to fill up my brain with “AAAAAAAAAAA” until I am vertical. I can’t articulate WHY it works, but so far it’s working for me!

Oh, Correct

shoutout to writers who:

you can do this, you belong here, and you deserve to treat yourself with kindness and care

Please reblog this so that I can get a bigger sample size, but DO NOT include anything in the tags about the results, as that could influence other responses

BREAKING NEWS: I GOIG TO FUCKING GET YOU

depression creature

image how much better if everyone, adults, teens, younger kids, all got recess. like if everyone got 45 minutes to an hour to just play around outside, do fun things, be “childish” and things

like my post you cowards, imagine it!

a judge: the court will now take a recess

all the lawyers: [scramble to put on sneakers and get to the playground first]

Love goth culture but not really loving this prevalent shift into distinct gender presentation that's developed as its become accepted in society. Or the... I guess gentrification is the wrong word.

Like. You remember goths with huge ratty hair and KISS makeup and men in heels and corsets and women in huge shapeless sweaters till you couldn't tell who was under what? Remember when the clothes were hand-shredded from the thrift store for five dollars and some spit?

My first black lipstick was eyeliner. What's this Women Get Crop Tops Only For $60 crap. What's this Being Goth Too Expensive shit. Girl draw ur nails on with sharpie and embrace damnation wtfff

Alt fashion being gentrified (which is the right word, you nailed it) is the most bullshit thing. My forebears didn't thrift/shoplift leather and jeans and hold their clothes together with pins and dye their hair together at whoever's house had a sink sprayer just so modern punks could lament the cost of a good battle jacket and ripped pair of off-the-rack jeans like! Girl!! Rip them yourself!! Throw box dye in your hair and leave it on for an hour before rinsing in the sink!! Keep your jeans for so long they tear THEN pin that shit together!! The entire point was that we didn't contribute to the capitalist machine by buying new things!!

Cheap, shitty, and now!!

You want a fishnet/mesh shirt? Get those halloween costume tights, or others that are on clearance. You cut off the toes, cut a hole in the crotch, and that's your shirt. (Psst! You can also use striped tights for this.) I like the Halloween costume kind because they are usually all fishnet without the more solid upper shorts bit regular tights often have, and they're usually way cheaper even when they're not on clearance.

Get cheap black clothing, bleach, and cheap paintbrushes or cotton swabs (or a bleach pen). Put a layer of cardboard between the layers of fabric and paint whatever you want on it with your bleach. (Search for "bleach painting" for more detail and inspo.) (I think some people use spray bottles bottles, too, but I've never tried that.)

Add safety pins to everything. Hell, string them together into a necklace and dangle charms from individual pins.

Get your black lipstick (or other uncommon color, like green) when halloween makeup is out. Wet n Wild often have fairly inexpensive products, and they're pretty good quality in my experience. (Plus sometimes you can find them on clearance even cheaper.)

You can get chain from the jewelry making/craft section and diy jewelry, or add chain to belts, hats, jackets, bags, whatever. (You can also salvage them from things like old wallets or decorative belts made from chain, which you can sometimes find in thrift stores.) Dog chains also work.

You can also as lace trim to pretty much anything, if that's more your style.

Found something at the (thrift or other) store, but it isn't black? Fabric dye, to the rescue!

Think outside the ready-made box, my lovely creatures of the night. Experiment! Get creative! Don't be afraid of things not turning out perfect!

Also: you don't have to be in all black. Jewel tones are common, but so are pastels. Be unlimited by stereotypes, and flourish 🖤

when i was a little kid i deeply cared about what peoples favorite color was

actually i still do what is yall favorite color >:(