@ithinktoomuch4438 / ithinktoomuch4438.tumblr.com
hey babe did it hurt when you fell from heaven? it did huh, emotionally, right I get that, because of the– yeah the irreconcilable separation from goodness as a result of a single decision that can never be undone or atoned for, uh huh, sounds rough
Deanna -the model- Winchester. That’s it. That’s the post.
bugs. episode of all time. has a 6.8 star IMDB rating when every other s1 episode averages around 8-9. the opening shot of sam lying sluttily on the hood of the impala. sam and dean being mistaken for a gay couple looking to buy property. sam and dean pretending to be a gay couple looking to buy property. "okay honey". dean slapping sam on the ass? the only time in the show i've seen sam and dean use umbrellas (finding out that kripke never wanted them to use umbrellas bc they weren't manly enough??) sam and dean breaking and entering and squatting :") a kid with a bug fixation, ostracised by his dad, who sam has an immediate connection with. winchester family dynamics. bugs as the ghost of settler colonial violence haunting American suburban gentrification. bugs as a metaphor for how fragile the facade of white picket fence suburbia really is. sam and dean aren't able to kill their way out of this week's monster. all they're able to do is save people, temporarily. they don't get to break the curse, and that's the point. it's bigger than either of them. hunting as a cycle of frontier violence perpetuating itself, and for once there are no black-or-white solutions. supernatural will never deal with this theme again! anyways, they put cast and crew in a room with 65000 bees but the damned bees didn't show up properly on camera so they ended up using CGI bees. they look horrible.
public service announcement
I keep getting people asking about bowling on this post so I’m just gonna repost this drawing I made on Twitter
How did her grandmother fill 4 vases?
She was a very large woman. Easily 12 feet tall.
then why the heck is her family not tall too?!?!
Pop-pop was very small so it canceled out.
Wait, so you’re telling me today’s the 4th? What’s next, the 5th? The minor fall? The major lift?
speechless. the pose. the expression. this should be a painting.
i'm no good at painting sorry. i have excessive line work instead
He’s finally learned magic
SUPERNATURAL 4.16
i don't actually think teenage Dean Winchester would be spurned-lover-style jealous of teenage Sam's girlfriends i think based on his s1 behavior that it's far more likely he went "HELL YEAH my little brother is DATING he is going to SLAY at this and i'll make sure of it," unilaterally appointed himself Sam's wingman, had to be beaten back with a stick from micromanaging his brother's love life, and probably lovingly fantasized about all the hot chicks Sam was gonna hook up with and all the things they'd get up to because let's face it, who wouldn't fall head over heels for the guy? (speculation about kissing practice, which of course Would Not Count as anything except making sure the little nerd did their family proud, is left as an exercise to readers who are so inclined.)
also probably the closest thing to a jealous shitfit he pulled involved one (1) time Sam ditched a hunt to be there for his then-girlfriend's Important Life Event, and it'd be like 40% loudly-expressed "he should be putting his FAMILY first" and 60% ferociously-suppressed "we don't get to just DO that! if i've accepted only ever being able to date super casually for a few weeks at a time before we blow town then where the fuck does he get off thinking he can just PRIORITIZE this COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP BEHAVIOR bullshit. that i tooootally don't want or care about anyway. because it's for SISSY NORMIE LOSERS, not a tight-knit clan of ULTRA-COOL SECRET MONSTER HUNTERS like us"
like i think Dean did accept much more readily, long before he could even realize the ramifications of what he was accepting, that the way they lived meant the Winchesters' only long-term relationship option was "rampant emotional incest that we don't have to acknowledge as long as we all only bang girls," but he also canonically had all kinds of festering resentment about missing out, and was aware on some level that their lives required the sacrifice of a lot of things he secretly longed for (and made a lot of noise about devaluing in favor of What's More Important)
and the toxic cocktail of that + envy of Sam's ability to just go "nah fuck expectations i want something else" + boundary-challenged investment/enabling/policing of each other's heterosexual exploits as a bulwark between their family dynamics and The Unspeakable + freakout over the early warning signs of a difference in values on family loyalty + inchoate terror of losing him to the outside world one day + unthinking idolization and projection along the lines of "well of course this girlfriend would take him away from us and wrap her entire life around his if she could, i mean, have you met him? who wouldn't want that? this is WHY we have to keep it casual and not get girls' expectations up"...
...the entire dynamic of Dean being Sam's number one hookup cheerleader but also perceiving signs of romance/commitment as a threat... s1 Dean trying to have a hand in pushing him towards actual romantic prospects anyway, because he's worried about Sam grief-spiraling and has reluctantly accepted that the rupture in the family is about things Sam genuinely wants, even as Sam's grief is already driving him to the conclusion that they aren't worth the cost and meanwhile the brothers have spent all season bonding even closer and more claustrophobically as adults...
well, i think all that is way more interesting, and in many ways even more fucked-up, than applying bog-standard jealous boyfriend tropes to the absolute mess of their upbringing
no school ever prepared me for what would turn out to be my principal preoccupation as an adult: making sure i cook and eat all the food i bought before it goes bad
Sam could put the car in park but he doesn't think it's going to take that long. Purling fog over the sidewalk and the tapedeck's got Sabbath on low, Paranoid, the engine rumbling through the steering wheel where he's got two fingers curled, idling on the brake while he watches in the wing mirror. A kiss. Like a movie, especially with them still in costume. Dean holds the low sweep of her back in that goofy princess dress and Jamie grips his white romance-hero sleeves and it's good, clearly, from how she curves into the shape of his body, how she looks up at him with her teeth in her lip. Sam can't see Dean's face from this angle but he can imagine it. When it's that good and they want him that bad, and they're imagining how it could be. His thumb riding low along the gentle curve of her cheek. Best they've ever had, bar none.
The passenger door opens, and closes. Dean follows his eyes to the wing mirror where the front door to Jamie's house is illuminated in porchlight, where she's locked her door against the night. "Perv," Dean says. Not sounding surprised or like he minds that much. While they watch the light goes out. Damsel off to bed. Dean rubs his fingers over his mouth, sighs. Says, "Are we going, or am I gonna regret letting you drive for the thousandth time?"
"I don't think you've let me drive a thousand times," Sam says, but he puts the car in gear. Ignores the four months in the rearview that he's trying to pack away tight and gone and enjoys Dean's mild bitching instead, about Sam's use of blinker signals and how fast he brakes and that he goes six over the speed limit instead of nine, all the way back across town to their motel.
Rare non-Oktoberfest theme, dark green bedspreads and gold-glow lamps that bring all the color back from the cold night outside. Dean looks even dumber struggling to unbuckle his suspenders. "Dude, why couldn't the fake vampire have gotten snap-on lederhosen," he mumbles. Sam snorts, dumps the keys on the table. Knocks Dean's hands away and gets one of the buckles undone in about three seconds, for which he gets a look. "I loosened it for you."
"Sure you did," Sam says. Gets the other and pushes the straps off Dean's shoulders so they swing around his hips. He flicks a button. "Is this the worst shirt in the world?"
"Ranked," Dean says, but he catches Sam's wrist. Stands there with his cheek sucked in on one side, looking at Sam's throat and then up to meet his eyes. "You know, I totally had an in, back there."
"Yeah, I know you did," Sam says. He lets Dean keep holding his wrist but starts unbuttoning the stupid shirt, anyway.
Flick of tongue to Dean's lower lip. "Dehymenation on lock. Big hero gets the damsel, the whole deal."
"I think she was technically the hero, since she shot the monster," Sam says. Dean's very pale under the shirt. His chest moving as he takes a deep breath. "Which makes you…"
"Don't say it," Dean says, and when Sam smiles he gets a backhanded smack to the shoulder. Sam pulls the shirt out of the tuck into the weird shorts and Dean grabs both his wrists then, tongue at the corner of his mouth. He takes a breath but doesn't say anything with it, and so Sam hooks the first two fingers of both hands into the waistband, hitches Dean those few inches closer. Touches his lips to Dean's temple and feels the next breath Dean takes with his whole body, seems like.
"Oh, Mister Harker," Sam says, quiet. Makes Dean puff out half-a-laugh, his head tipping back. Sam takes him in, like this. Safe and smiling, in a motel with a locked door, no particular horror about to batter the walls down. This day or two the easiest he's been in—since he's come back. Easier than he was the whole year before that, and maybe the year before that, and maybe for a long time that Sam didn't see him. He breaks Dean's grip on his right hand and cups Dean's cheek in his hand and Dean's eyes go to this other darker color, his lips parting.
A kiss—easy, brief. No romance soundtrack and nothing crazy other than how crazy it always is. Dean's mouth and the way he tips into it soft and willing and the brief taste of beer and then the salt-spit tang that's meant Sam's brother just about as long as anything's meant anything. Their noses brush warmly and Dean smiles, for what reason Sam doesn't know. When he lifts up an inch or two there's no answer. He drags his thumb along the curve of Dean's jaw and Dean opens his eyes, pleased. So good Sam could take him literally any way. Even in the awful knee-high socks. Although—
"If we're dehymenating you, can we lose the costume?" Sam says, and Dean grips his hair and says, "If you never mention the costume again, I'll do that thing you pretend you don't like," and Sam says, flushing warm, "Deal." He doesn't have to imagine because he knows. Best he's ever had, or will.
horse whose hooves are stuck individually in different colored buckets the horse seems a bit surprised but unbothered the sign of a well mannered yet perhaps empty minded horse or perhaps this is all a goof of the horses own design
I work at an equine hospital and for non horse people, there’s ice in those buckets for the horse’s feet. This is a common thing to do after a horse eats too much food, as ingesting high amounts of sugar causes inflammation in the hoof. So this horse is not just content in his buckets, he’s likely just enjoyed the greatest meal of his life.
it got lost in the sauce so hard that it had to put its feet in the sauce shoutout to a homie and a legend
The people who think that Sam never had sex until he was with Jessica because she was "the one" are really fricking goofy.
AU where the timeline gets reset but Zuko still has all his memories. Now in comic form
The backstory for this drawing
Sometimes I think about exactly how powerful Zuko’s story as an abuse victim is and I just have to stop and tear up for a minute.
Just let it sink in that at 13 years old, Zuko’s father mutilated him in front of an audience and told him he was worthless and unwelcome until he completed an impossible mission. Nobody stepped in to help him. Most onlookers thought he deserved it, and even Iroh was too afraid of Ozai to challenge him in Zuko’s defense.
Zuko went on for years believing Ozai was right, and didn’t recognize what happened to him as abuse. He thought his banishment and suffering were his own fault because something was wrong with him, and that it was his duty to change to become worthy again.
Then this scene? Absolutely incredible.
Zuko’s whole journey leads up to this confrontation, where he not only recognizes that he holds no responsibility for the abuse inflicted on him; he confronts his abuser and tells him he was wrong to treat him that way, that he doesn’t owe his abuser anything.
And not only that, Zuko also tells Ozai that he sees how he’s hurting the rest of the world the same way he hurt him, and vows to stop him. That’s literally so powerful, especially watching this as someone who once felt as broken and alone as Zuko once did. His story is everything to me.
