Since I already brought up my university’s chaplain once today, I thought I’d share with you the best advice he ever gave me.
If someone is suffering and you want to help, instead of saying “let me know if there’s anything I can do,” offer a few options of things you know you can do.
“Can I do your dishes while you study for your exam?”
“Would it help if I came to the waiting room with you?”
“I can distract you if you like.”
When someone’s suffering, making them choose how to be helped can sometimes be an extra burden, especially if they don’t know how serious your offer is. By giving examples, they only need to say yes/no, and they know you wouldn’t offer anything too big for you to handle.
gonna expand on this by saying, please don’t offer something you genuinely aren’t prepared to follow through on. I’ve had too many people leave me in the dust in crucial moments that way. Likewise, I’ve also been in the position where I’ve had to do something I wasn’t prepared to do. So: Offer the help you know you can give. Even the little things help.