"okay kid, i have a doctors appointment, you can handle this big fuckoff bus, i believe in you, keys are in the ignition, this thing DOES NOT HAVE INSURANCE so DON'T GET PULLED OVER, have fun"

Just a few hours ago, GlitchmanVGM released this sensational remix of the intro theme for Harvest Moon 64! Please give it a listen, and when you're done, maybe go to youtube to give them some support in the comments!

An excerpt from the video description:

Round 1: ELLI (64) vs INARI (3oT)

based on this lmaooo

Talking about Harvest Moon/Story of Seasons with people who have never played it is fun because they assume it’s a cute, innocent farming game, and for the most part it is, but also in HMDS

-you can let your dog attack the mayor at the beginning of the game and presumably kill him (the credits roll immediately afterwards and the screen fades to red in the European version)

-you can poison the entire town at the Harvest Festival (again with the potential for an immediate game over if you submit a level 100 poison mushroom)

-you can fight the girls behind your dog house at 4:44 AM

-one of the bachelorettes requires you to kill 50 animals to marry her

-depending on where you pass out, the villagers can steal up to half of your money

-the mines are filled with dark creatures you have to fight, including a dark version of yourself

-this one's FoMT and not DS, but if you pass out while the hospital bed is being used by another character, you get a cutscene of the doctor shoving him and then the nurse dragging him away so you can use the bed

And half of that sounds like rumors you’d read on game forums, but nope, that’s just Harvest Moon baby!

these are amazing and somehow there’s still more

- there’s a dream scene where you bring one of your sheep into the mines where all of the girls are waiting. they all take turns saying “Meat medley.” then you shove the sheep towards them, the screen fades to black and you hear chopping noises and when it fades back in, you’re all holding sheep and take turns saying “Thank you for the meal” before eating them

- the bachelorette who requires you to sacrifice 50 animals also requires you to poison for 5 years at the harvest festival. both of those are just to see her second heart event. one of her marriage requirements is to give her a total of 10,000 gifts… one at a time (the most cruel)

- in the boy version, the NA publisher initially messed up the counter for animals killed which made it impossible to marry her even if you met the requirements. also the counter for items shipped doesn’t count a digsite item even if you ship it and buckwheat flour is unobtainable so you can’t marry the goddess either, since she needs you to 100% your shipping list

- you can marry a mermaid, but you need to build a pond for her. it’s also possible for the pond to be destroyed by a typhoon, if that happens your wife is just gone (she’ll still show up for family events / festivals though. if she blows away before she gets pregnant then you MIGHT have difficulty having a child)

- everyone in the game is a “descendant” of physically identical characters from A Wonderful Life and Friebds of Mineral Town. …including married couples who are descended from the married couples. the EN localization also gave them identical names to their “ancestors” but kept the dialogue where they speak in third person about someone with their name

- in the girl version there’s a phone order clothes shop, you can marry the salesman if you talk to him enough times (another instant game over)

- there were so many glitches in the first NA release of hmds that it puts bethesda to shame: saving your file in any screen that had moving characters can corrupt your save file (this game infected me with paranoid frequent multi track saving syndrome) getting 1 billion gold from hiring the fishing team in winter (WHY and HOW this glitch occurs is still an actual unsolved mystery that no one has yet cracked. the trigger is known but the process of the glitch is an enigma) horse milking, invisible horse, Oops All Leias, glitch that causes the entire town to be devoid of life until you throw your dog ball into the pond to force thomas to retrieve it (along with the rest of the hostage npcs), glitch that causes your wife and child to disappear if you play a game with the cursed bear (i’m amazed this isn’t intentional) that’s all i can think of PLEASE add more i know there’s more

even beyond hmds

-the entire town comes to shame you in the gba version of fomt if you buy gold lumber and place it on your farm and will call you “moneybags” until you remove it from the premises

-the doctor in story of seasons (need I say more?)

-one of the bachelors in story of seasons may have been a reformed thief and makes a very obvious sexual innuendo at one of the festivals to you if you’re married to him

-the priest in fomt claims to be an open and judgementless ear, but judges the shit out of you in the confessional booth and yells at you for confessing every now and again

-there’s a cutscene in hm64 and in fomt (gba version) too that involves getting one of the bachelorettes insanely drunk in a drinking contest, and at least in fomt version, you have to take the loser home to his wife and watch her yell at him for drinking too much

-one of the non romanceable npcs is in love with another of the non romanceable npcs, but the one he’s in love with is married, but her husband is out of the picture while he searches for something to cure her ailment, so he lusts from afar

(ꈍ ᴗ ꈍ✿)

being a fan of story of seasons (or harvest moon or bokumono or bokujou monogatari or ranch story or farm story or–)

harvest moon animal parade, watery cave blue bell and hot spring

Bridge Talk

finally got all 9 endings in save the homeland last night and THIS is what we got in return

so u want to date me? ?

Harvest Moon Heritage Post

While most of the gameplay footage is very familiar to A Wonderful Life fans, something interesting happens when you approach the exit to the Valley...

"Sometimes it might be nice to go to a faraway town… It takes about 6 hours though, what should I do?"

Though, to be completely accurate, there's no way to tell if it means a specific faraway town or just any town. The person playing also only refers to it as an "unknown place." I wonder if there will be any special activities you can do this way? The original game mostly just updated Van's shop and has Lou teach you some new recipes and neither of those took six hours... Though I'm not familiar enough with AWL SE on PS2 to know how it's handled there.

Thanks for help with translating @regularcelery!

Man when the wiki said Gale’s marriage was different from the other bachelors they weren’t kidding

🐄 🐄 🐄 🐄