chin up, kid. happy looks good on you

Here's to nine years of IP hell, babey!

SEE YOU IN HELL, PUNK

i think the reason why the assassination of Julius Caesar is one of the funniest political assassinations is for this very simple reason:

1 guy stabs 1 guy: not funny. that's murder.

2 guys stab 1 guy: even less funny. that's two against one.

60 guys stab 1 guy: uproariously funny. why do you need so many guys.

‘why do you follow prev’ polls please don’t ask me that i’ve been here since 2011 i don’t know who anyone is anymore including myself

Further Americanisms that tell you to check on your American:

been better = in hell

doin’ alright = sad, needs hug

pretty great! = genuine actual baseline. Anything else ranks beneath this. Be Aware.

I’m here, ain’t I? = Defcon 5

Because someone asked, indications that an American is actually Having A Good Day include:

“Living the dream” is a sign of SEVERE distress please get your American medical assistance immediately if they start saying that! It really means something like “this is the worst day of my life”

(I say this as an American who has Never been having a good time when I’ve said that)

I NEED TO READ I NEED TO WRITE I NEED TO CREATE I NEED TO DRAW I NEED TO CLEAN I NEED TO WORK OUT I NEED TO LEARN *watches YouTube for 6 hours*

“Why did you follow this person ? uwu”

I’ve been here for fourteen years, do you think I remember? I don’t know who any of these people are anymore. I don’t know why they’re on my dash. I allow them to stay because they haven’t pissed me off enough to unfollow them yet. “Why did you follow this person?” I’m not sure I ever did. They’re just part of my ecosystem now.

My fellow tumblerinas, at least those of you who are still with us. Since we are being sold out to AI we have a job to do that no one does better than us. Now more than ever we have to post bad. Make bad posts like you're killing a man with it. Post bad so ai dies faster. Make bad posts and post them bad

The most terrifying part of having memory issues is when you can feel something from 5 seconds ago be thrown out the window and there's an empty hole where it once was. You remember that you forgot something.

Even saying ”I’m so sorry, I completely forgot” sounds marginally better than ” I’m so sorry, I didn’t completely forget, I actually completely remembered. I thought about it the whole time and it stressed me out so much my brain built an insurmountable wall around it.”

this is my new favorite genre of images

here’s more, you gremlins.

love how people are remembering that in everyone else's pov percy is described as this scary super powerful demigod and then in his own pov he's thinking stuff like "I wonder if blue mac & cheese will stain my teeth"

very small