aeiou

aliens: we will force billions to live in near-poverty

me: tell me when you figure out how you'll change how things work

Toothpaste companies must really hate people who are allergic to mint toothpaste, which a lot of people are! Apparently it's NOT supposed to burn like minty hellfire? (I'm fine with mint candy, it's only mint toothpaste that hurts)

I've been using Tom's fennel for years, but am now trying to find one with fluoride in it, and finding a toothpaste that is no mint and yes fluoride should not be such a huge and infuriating quest. still got some more grocery stores to search, but not even the children's toothpaste in the nearest one had any that were suitable.

#LIKE FIIIIRE! HELLFIIIIIRE! THIS FIRE ON MY TONGUE! #I therefooooore requiiiire a new paste tooooo cleeaaan gums #It's not my fault! I'm not to blame! it is the Colgate brand and Crest who've set this flame! #it's not my fault‚ if in their plans‚ they made the toothpaste so much stronger than a maaaaaaannnnnn #protect me‚ oh grocers! don't let the mint-paste cast its spell‚ don't let its fire sear my mouth and gums! #PROVIDE ME WITH FLUORIDE‚ but not mixed with the fires of Hell‚ and I'll keep all my teeth for years to cooooommeeee

Emphathize with OP definitely but also look at the incredible tags lmao

Beata Maria, you know I'm a hygienic man of my flossing I am justly proud.

Beata Maria, my teeth are so much cleaner than the common, vulgar, weak, licentious crowd.

Then tell me, Maria, why it's never good enough why the pits of rot still mar my teeth.

I must switch to fluoride, but all the options I can find are full of minty pain beyond belief!

Wait back up,

Toothpaste isn't supposed to burn? I thought that's how you knew it worked

NO

But mint is supposed to be spicy though, right? Like how cinnamon is?

NO it's supposed to cause a cooling effect. Like how aloe vera feels on skin, unless that also feels hot to you.

It is, I am told, supposed to "tingle a little bit", which is NOT what it's doing for me. It feels like the minty version of eating a painfully spicy hot pepper, and sticks around for a long time afterwards just like hot peppers do, and it wouldn't make sense to do that on purpose in a thing you're supposed to use before trying to go to sleep.

Thank you to all the suggestions in the comments! Sadly I have seen none of them in grocery stores so far, but it's good to know there are options if I end up having to order toothpaste online.

I'm astounded that it's so hard to find non-mint options, because there are SO MANY comments already on this post from people who can't stand mint, and don't these companies do market research?? hello? huge untapped market for non-mint adult toothpaste here?? There must be thousands upon thousands of adults who use children's toothpaste because of it. If I saw an advertisement that started off with someone complaining about mint toothpaste, it would catch my attention.

Hey friends, just so you know you can absolutely use children's toothpaste with fluoride as an adult and there are many flavors like bubblegum and strawberry and grape (here's Tom's of Maine with a fluoride-containing mango and orange toothpaste). Using children's toothpaste with fluoride is much, much better than using a fluoride-free toothpaste. If you're looking for toothpaste with an adult amount of fluoride and the mint ones bother you, try looking for cinnamon toothpaste - a lot of the grownup non-mint flavors don't have fluoride but cinnamon ones often do.

Most (possibly all) big-brand cinnamon flavors also have mint.

Close-Up Ultra Cinnamon Blast, Crest Whitening Expressions in Cinnamon Rush, and Tom's Whole Care Cinnamon Clove are cinnamon-flavored, fluoride-containing adult toothpastes without the mint; colgate's cinnamon flavor is "cinnamint" so skip that one for sure.

ASCII art 10,000

“It’s something to do” sIR—

Dumbasses: AI is good actually because it means the poor poor disableds can finally make an art!

Top G Paul Smith: look at this cool squirrel I made entirely on a typewriter :)

okay.

“Put it all in his pussy” I love it. He just wadded it all up and shoved it right in there. Crammed it all in. That expression should be commonplace too.

"pointillism is sexual" is certainly a bold claim by tumblr but for once i think we should hear them out on this

You people talk about ADHD / Narcissism / Depression / etc the same way that medieval peasants talked about their humoric temperament.

TikTok voice: "Ten Tips To Make Sure Your Daughter Isn't Dating A Suitor With An Abundance Of Yellow Bile"

My Mother Was Phlegmatic And Her Presence Plagues Me With Foul Spirits

the x files is funny because at the time it was “progressive” or whatever to have the ultra-rational, levelheaded character be a woman

but it’s also a show where all the fucked up alien shit actually is real, so she’s just constantly wrong about everything

What’s funny is how often they’re both wrong. Mulder will be like “the victims all had their livers scooped clean out this is obviously the aliens escalating from cattle mutilation” and Scully will be like “don’t be silly Mulder this is clearly just a serial killer who’s really good with surgical tools” and then it turns out the actual killer is an immortal sewer man who comes out ever quarterly century to feast on human liver.

I cannot stress enough that this is literally the plot of an actual episode

I hate the “we should have child free cafes but not dog free cafes” and the “kids shouldn’t be out in public” shit that’s getting popular again cause whenever you ask them why they hate kids they say their loud annoying etc.

Just because another person is inconvenient for you doesn’t mean they don’t get to exist in public.

I feel so horrible for the future generations, I really do. Not only are we taking away all their spaces (getting angry when they’re out in public at malls theatres etc. hell even McDonald’s has been taking down play places and there’s not enough people taking care of public parks) but we’re also demonizing them to the point of comedy.

imagine being 22 years old and all you like to do is draw comics about murdering people and Nickelodeon contacts you to write a childrens’ show 

i didn’t realize this was about Jhonen Vasquez and I was thinking “oh god what happened now”

hhhaank 🫣

what's gotten in to him?

What I imagine happened after mpn2

Hank Vs Knife Speakerman