Oh no

The man of the hour

I believe the strings may have broke

sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Ask me Dunce anything! Open!

There was a strange clown man- creature was a better word for it really, arts that moved like no bones existed in them, rubberhose like even, his body however was ordinary enough, unable to stretch and bend in ways the arms were capable of, crawling on all fours, sometimes stopping to dig and slap things out of his way. Both his hands were missing thumbs- oh but his face, that was the most gruesome part, one that could make even the toughest man faint like it were a movie in the olden days.

His face was ruined to say the least, missing eyelids so his eyes were bright red, dark circles surrounding the eyes as if he hadn't slept properly in weeks, a wide smile spread across his face but it was no ordinary smile, both his lips were gone, most of his cheeks as well to create a large smile that mimicked that of a painted red clown smile.

His eyes landed on you, the poor poor soul who had to witness the sight of him, instead of doing anything illegal, he instead moved a little closer and sat himself down on the ground, giving a small wave, perhaps he was waiting for your final words or perhaps he wanted to make a friend. if you have anything to say, now would be the time to say it.

I hate you.

every time this goes around I age 10 years

THATS NOT EVEN A WORD AND I AGREE WITH YA

WEVE BEEN SMECKLEDORFED

OHMYGOD. 

Why would there be a bottle of wine on the stove?!

WTF Barbie you can’t use a cutting board for a bulletin board

BARBIE! you should know better than to leave a cheese grater on the edge of the fridge! someone could get hurt!

Um, okay, DOES NO ONE REALIZE THAT BARBIE is cleaning her kitchen floor with a garden hose? Get it together, Barbie.

OH MY GOD BARBIE! ARE YOU JUST GOING TO LEAVE THOSE DIRTY DISHES IN YOUR SINK? SERIOUSLY GET IT TOGETHER BARBIE!

…Seriously?

People. Wow. Open your EYES.

Is NOBODY going to point out how Barbie is CLEANING HER FLOOR

IN

WHITE

PANTS???

CLOSE THE DAMN REFRIGERATOR! YOUR LETTING ALL THGE COLD OUT!

Barbie, seriously? The blender on top of the fridge? You could get hurt!!1

Guys for the love of god how can you not notice the freaking rat next to the fridge?! WTF Barbie? Clean your house more often, would ya?

Barbie, who the hell puts a calculator on their fridge. COME ON! GET WITH THE TIMES!

I love how everyone pretends not to notice the toaster next to the sink. BARBIE! YOU COULD GET ELECTROCUTED IF THAT FELL IN! GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER GURL!

what the hell is wrong with you people???!?!?!

omfg how can you not notice the fact the fridge has three layers of drawers on the bottom? what the fuck?? barbie fridges dont work that way im sorry

SERIOUSLY?!! YOU PEOPLE ARE SICK! CAN YOU SEE THAT A SERIOUS CRIME HAS BEEN COMMITTED HERE?!!

THAT WALLPAPER! IT’S HIDEOUS! Get a freakin’ sense of style, woman!

theres a dead body

World Heritage Post

That plant too close to the edge is what really gets me

What does it take to teach a bee to use tools? A little time, a good teacher and an enticing incentive. Read more here: http://to.pbs.org/2mpRUAz

Credit: O.J. Loukola et al., Science (2017)

@clockworkrobotic

“Friend? Friend push ball? I push ball. I do good.”

Bees.  Smart enough to push a ball, not smart enough to not be fooled by a stick masquerading as a bee. 

maybe they know and they’re just being polite

Other dimensional beings are undoubtedly amazed at what human beings will accept as human beings too. “But it’s just a stick with a person on it.”

#excuse me neil but what the FUCK was that #thanks for that terrifying thought (nooby-banana)

NEIL WHY. WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT.

This turns up on my dashboard. And I read it and am impressed that someone writes exactly the post that I’d write, without actually reading the name of the person who posted it.

And then I’m puzzled at all the Neil Why’s, and realise that this was me in the Wayback Long-ago.

At least I’m consistent.

And, I should point out, we are no closer to being able to spot the extra-dimensional stick “people” who move unobserved among us.

Hey man, I'm GoNnA eAt YoUr GiRLfRiEnD~

IS THIS THE “and they say girls with dimples cant be nurses” BITCH SHBABAJSJSNSAJJ

only LEGENDS make it to tumblr ads 💅🏽

I mean she's very pretty but who said that? Like honestly--

Good ol’ Garf

love this garf

#wait this art style is so soothing

meep.

reblog for noises

he really came out and just said “e”

This is the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen.

It took me a moment but oh boy did I laugh

The assassin you sent after me is part of my found family now

Can we talk about how in zombie shows/movies/books they always find a veterinarian and not a surgeon? Are veterinarians deemed more likely to survive the apocalypse?

Yup.

This post is deemed culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant as certified by the National Shitpost Registry.

my family fucked up my life by using spoonerisms interchangeably with their true phrase counterparts since before i was born and now i can’t escape from instinctively saying shit like “im gonna shake a tower”

oh “meeking a smee” made me feel like i was being fucking tazed

theres a lot of people on this website who dont realize their dad is a gnome