Now I can’t help but imagine a 60 year old seriel killer at a millenials door waiting, mad as fuck, checking his watch , and leaving out of frustration and writes a blog post about how millenials are ruining this country

Are Millennials Killing The Serial Killer Industry?

me: *gets scared that i’m wasting my life* me: i’m gonna deal with this feeling by taking a long nap in the middle of the day

Via Pixel Factor

you can actually see him go through all five stages of grief 

god nerfed me by making me allergic to garlic and sunlight

so, a vampire?

i can confirm that i am not a vampire as i have blood

Is it your blood?

it is blood, yes

Is it blood that has always belonged to you, from the moment of your spawning?

it is blood, it is in my possession, therefore it is my blood

someone: I love reading about serial killers

me: yeah it’s interesting to look at different cases of psychopathy and see how they are almost always rooted in an abusive childhood

someone: no I mean I find them hot

me: 

#is this flirting or threatening?

my dad guillermo laying it out

His table is piled high with food he will never touch but he will kill you for taking the smallest morsel, even if you are starving

shit how did I completely miss the point of this part

Also, his eyes aren’t in his head. They’re in his hands. He only sees what he reaches for, what he desires, what he wants.

what level of woke

Guillermo del Toro is a fucking artist and he knows what he’s doing. I love that man

some post: it’s okay if you haven’t done all these things yet! there’s no time limit and you move at your own pace! you shouldn’t be upset because you’re eighteen and none of it’s happened!

me, a 22yr old: 

my sister-in-law, who has no kids and does not spend time around children ever, decided she wanted to take my kids on an “outing” yesterday. (she sees them like 4 times a year usually). she took them to some weird historical u.s. military fort museum thing, it’s like a big compound with like 15 buildings enclosed by a fence. anyway my 5-yr-old saw one of those red metal fire alarm boxes on the wall and asked his aunt “what does that say?”

now the correct answer to this question, in my opinion, would be “that is a fire alarm. we only touch fire alarms if there is a fire. if there is a fire, you would pull the handle and it would make a very loud noise so that other people know to get out of the building.”

according to several reliable sources, my sister-in-law’s answer to the question was, “it says ‘pull.’”

so anyway that’s how they managed to evacuate all 15 buildings at the museum and why this is probably their last “outing” for a while.

I’m not into pranking people, so I decided I’d show you some animals that look silly instead.

Andean Cock of the Rocks (ALWAYS WATCHING)

Arabian sand boas (DOING THEIR BEST)

Dik diks (SMALL?????????)

Softshell turtles (SMOOTH BOYS)

Christmas tree worms (FESTIVE FRIENDS)

Saiga antelopes (I LOVE YOU BUT WHY)

Baikal seals (ROUND BOYS)

I refuse to believe any of these are real

Tibetan Foxes are also very good:

All of these look like my attempts to draw animals

Man I feel this on a personal level.

i wanna know the story behind this

What the FUCK