The Cornelia Diaries

Our new reality. Living in London during Lockdown has triggered many questions. The things I love about my city disappeared from view for a very long time. Left was an uneasy feeling of being trapped inside a flat whist the world outside seemed to spin out of control. Don’t get me wrong, there were some positives too. Where we live, a sense of community started to emerge and neighbours started to look out for each other. As we are slowly moving towards a new normal it will be interesting to see what a post-pandemic London looks like. How has your life changed since lockdown? #lockdown #pandemic #covid_19 #covidvacccine #lockdownbaby #communitysupport #maskup #newnormal #newparents #mentalhealthawarenessweek #londonlife #londonlockdown #todolondon #homemademask #pandemiclife #familyofthree #rethinklife #imissmyfamily (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CPrBfMPlmkQ/?utm_medium=tumblr

In times of unrest. What would the world be like if humans acted like trees? Many of you know fungi is the information superhighway that interactions between a large, diverse population of individuals in the plant world. Trees who may be widely separated but manage to help each other unconditionally. Why is it that humans find it so hard to strive for peace? #newparent #newbaby #getreel #myday #nofilter #thingsthatmatter #newlifechapter #babymama #springflowers #walkinlondon #parklife #babyinnature #peace #war #trees #fungi #historyrepeatsitself (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CO6Lklel1U6/?igshid=pawu1tmp23gz

Almost there. Enjoying the quiet in Regents Park before the city starts opening up again. Freja and I have not spent a life together without lockdown before. What will this new normal be like? Could the change will lead to some sort of sensory overload? She’ll be fine of course. I’m the anxious one. (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CNdRZE2lcad/?igshid=a0dx4kbu9zvt

Easter Dinner We talked about cooking an elaborate Easter dinner tonight, including a pickled herring starter and a Nut-roast main. I set the table early doors. But now it’s dinner time and all our energy has been consumed for the day. Despite the setting, our evening meal will now be something simple. It’s ok. It’s a life of quick turns. #easterdinner #newparent #eggseggseggs #pastelshades #glassware #flowerpatterns #dinnerfortwo❤️ (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CNQP7wqFmlj/?igshid=1fn324i5kmws7

Lockdown Easter Around this time last year we were still new to Lockdown life. I was in my first trimester with Freja and anxiety levels were through the roof. Martyn was not allowed into the hospital during scans. We were extremely cautious about sharing the news and I was holding on for dear life with trembling knuckles. Celebrating Easter wasn’t really an option for us. Now it’s Easter again (!) and we are still in partial Lockdown (!!) but somehow things could not be any different. We made it through that difficult year. My grip has softened and our eyes have opened. Easter is a time of renewal, a reminder of life restored. #easterlockdown #eastermemories #antenataldepression #newparent #reborn #easterblessings (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CNNmy2xFypv/?igshid=69q2hwcbcqvy

Easter Crafts bring back memories. When I was a kid, we used to dye our Easter eggs with onion skins and craft hens and chickens out of egg carton, googly eyes and felt. We would continue make hanging Easter decorations for our Påskris (Easter Twigs). At the beginning of Easter weekend I would draw as many Easter greetings cards as there were neighbours, dress up as påskkärring (Easter Witch) and gang up with the rest of the kids in the village to start our yearly walk and knocking on doors. For each neighbour we would gift a piece of our craft and receive candy, fruit or a coin in return. I can only imagine how many other Easter traditions exist around the world! (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CNDfPEblw3-/?igshid=obemvnnodfoc

How to have time for everything? You don’t. You do what you can. Now when the weather is changing for the better and the flat screams for a full scrub down I find it even harder to accept. My plants need new soil and I’d like to decorate the whole house with little tokens of spring. But I will do almost none of that because she is the most precious to me and she takes up all my time. All I can do is borrow a few blossoming branches, pop them in a vase and let them express everything I would have liked to get done in a different life and time. (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CM0K2EWF8RK/?igshid=1l9ymum7g2oy4

First Mother’s Day ❤️ 📸 @tinam.photography (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CMaaT-NFKsg/?igshid=xa8e2qiuubpu

Happy International Women’s day! Today and everyday, I’m feeling hopeful for my daughter as we progress towards a more equal society and aim to smash down the glass ceilings. I want a society where my daughters abilities will be judged on merit and that her voice will be heard loud and clear. We’ve still got a long way to go but I’m optimistic for the future and inspired by all powerful, diligent, tenacious and wonderfully intelligent women out there. #internationalwomensday (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CMKmtnjFud9/?igshid=19qqyz514txcd

Being pregnant during a pandemic made me reevaluate how I best look after myself physically and mentally. Over the last few weeks of having a new born I have had to adjust to little to no sleep and how it affects my mood and ability to carry out daily tasks. The things that used to be important to me has realigned, however a few weeks in I’m starting to be able to see which parts of my old life that can slowly come back. Life has been upgraded. What are your tips on how to manage sleep deprivation? (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CKMd0qUlw3b/?igshid=1di3erldfmez7

Like mother, like daughter. 🧑🏻‍🦰 (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CJ1Lu3cFZ8C/?igshid=1iu4ozg7px9s7

How to sum up 2020? No doubt it has been a tumultuous year. 2020 brought out some of the worst and some of the best experiences in my life. Freja being born was by far the most positive thing that’s ever happened to me. The time leading up to it less ideal. Knowing that Freja won’t be seeing our friends or members of our family in months to come because of a pandemic is frustrating. But if this year has thought me anything it’s how to conquer fear with love, and for that I am grateful. Happy New Year ❤️ (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CJebpniFOdz/?igshid=ik0lgwkowrh5

Good morning. We’re getting close. 💜 (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CJDpuGPlNi0/?igshid=10vs5rqubidn7

Packing my bag for labour. The list can be as long or short as you want! I’m bringing three outfits for the baby, nappies and a pram suit. Car seat for the cab home. Battery operated candles, lavender essential oil and a little speaker for the playlist I put together a week ago. A wash bag with tooth brush and face wash, medicines, maternity pads and contacts. My earplugs, eye mask, pyjamas, robe and slippers for the overnight stay. A couple of changes of day clothes. Print out of my birth plan and my affirmations. An amethyst I got gifted by friends at my mother blessing. It will remind me of the hypnobirthing techniques I’ve been practicing on. Snacks for me, Martyn and the hospital staff. Phone charger. How it will all fit I don’t know! (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CI_tqxFl5-e/?igshid=1qup4lfhcpj5v

Going for a walk during lockdown is the only thing that’s kept me sane over this tumultuous year. With nowhere to go and no one to see I’ve taken solace in greeting the trees, the birds and the empty pavements. What are you doing to create balance during lockdown? (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CI8pEjdlV-Z/?igshid=j0u1rgtn1zyr

Some of you know that my favourite instrument is the Omnichord. My OM84 System Two has been absolutely instrumental (pun intended) for my songwriting. It’s travelled with me through countless airports and train stations, been hauled onto tour buses and into taxis all over the world. It was originally manufactured in Japan in the 80’s and includes twin strumplate voices with variable sustain. In layman’s terms it’s an electric harp. (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CI3ocNpl8vt/?igshid=15i6asp5d4qck

At the weekend my friends threw me a virtual mother/baby blessing. We chatted about memories from the past and new ones to come. We spoke about motherhood and meditated together. We opened cards and gifts. We nibbled on home made high tea and laughed at each others jokes. All of this suddenly made my pregnancy feel more real. For the first time I said out loud: I am about to become a mother and I’m really looking forward to meet my baby. (at London, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CIyfh7_FgVJ/?igshid=b8wy91tnh4wb