Nightcrawler - $45
Gembound - $30
Sunset Haze - $45
Citrus Halo - $30
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We need to lay more blame for "Kids don't know how computers work" at the feet of the people responsible: Google.
Google set out about a decade ago to push their (relatively unpopular) chromebooks by supplying them below-cost to schools for students, explicitly marketing them as being easy to restrict to certain activities, and in the offing, kids have now grown up in walled gardens, on glorified tablets that are designed to monetize and restrict every movement to maximize profit for one of the biggest companies in the world.
Tech literacy didn't mysteriously vanish, it was fucking murdered for profit.
Linux is a very good and powerful alternative.
Also. Not for nothing.
Can't believe how fuckin' hard the Dungeons and Daddies crew went in their first episode of season 2.
Anthony Burch really said "the breakfast club but in a post apocalyptic wasteland where the sky is blood red and the sun is black," they fought a terrifying humanoid monster baby, had terrible visions of their dads (and step-dads) being hurt and held against their wills, found out that magic existed and they had access to it, then had even more terrifying visions of Akira-ed kindergarters. And it ended with a terrifying monster on a treadmill and a challenge to speed run life.
Like, the rowdy, horny, violent podcast for grown-ups warning was really not messing around here. They were like, time to fuck around with some freaky cosmic horror shit. Also these teens are perfect.
I'm sorry I took so long. You've been waiting all this time 💫✨🌟
Is it really a brawling if there’s only two of them?
Brawling is a verb. Two people can brawl.
Oh damn the Catholics have joined in on the war against AI "art".
dndads is kind of sad because imagine like. there's four men who are deadass soulmates in some way shape or form, they fit together despite everything and are an insane team. then their kids? they dont have that connection. but its fine, not everyone can have such a weird connection between four people- ah nevermind now the kids kids have that exact connection between the four of them.
Credit: This is my own spin off to a story I read on here and I can’t find the story again, so please, please text me for inspo credit!
P.S. Also this is my first story since I started up writing again! Please feel free to send me a DM with suggestions or advice! Banner at the end by @cafekitsune Enjoy!!
Word count: 1.6K
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"I’ve never done this before,"
You admitted lowly, the rush of adrenaline pulsing through your veins as you sank to your knees on Anakin’s bedroom floor. Panic and excitement warred within you, mingling with a heady anticipation of the unknown. As you both surrendered to the electric tension that had been building between you, a whirlwind of thoughts raced through your mind - are you ready to embrace the unknown, or are you merely a passenger on this journey of forbidden desire?
Amidst the chaos of your emotions, one thing remains clear - in this moment, you feel truly alive. Being naked and this vulnerable in front of Anakin was not only a new experience but a thrilling one as well. His thumb traced your bottom lip as he let you wrestle his pants off. The riveting touch of his rough fingers against your skin sends shivers down your spine, igniting a firestorm of desire that threatens to consume you whole. As his tongue glides along his bottom lip, you find yourself mesmerized by the raw intensity of his gaze. Those eyes, his enchanting blue eyes, stare down at you. The heat of his glare sends a rush of heat flooding your cheeks, a flush of arousal steadily boiling within you.
Every word that leaves your lips seems to fan the flames of desire kindling within him.
He needed you.
"You'll be perfect, y/n— Just—"
His words trailed off into a low, deep growl but the heat in his eyes spoke volumes as your hand tentatively wrapped around him. Butterflies flutter in your stomach, a mix of nervousness and desire churning within you. He rolled his head back and took a deep breath. As his hand tangles in your hair, you feel a surge of heat radiating from his touch, a tangible reminder of the burning hunger simmering between you. The urgency in his actions sends a thrill racing down your spine, a heady mixture of fervor and anxiety pooling in the pit of your stomach as he pushes you closer to his pulsing cock.
"Mmm," Anakin's mouth betrayed him as you took his tip into your wet lips. The sweetness of his precum traveled through your tastebuds as you swirled around him, trying to take more of him in. Your thoughts clouded quickly as you let yourself fall into your own sense of pleasure. His cock made your mouth feel full and warm as his hand in your hair guided you.
Your eyes glanced up to catch a glimpse of the lovely Jedi; his stomach flexed with sweat glistening on his bare skin, and his mouth was agape with surprise. The feeling of seeing him surprised by something you’re doing to him made your core tighten, and you used the feeling of satisfaction to push your throat deeper around his cock.
“That’s it, fuck, that’s it,” his tone was smooth and it rang through your ears, erupting a small chill to travel down your back. The scruff of his pubes grazed your lip as his hair-wrapped hand held your head firmly in place. Your throat started to contract, begging you for air as lines of drool trailed from the corners of your mouth. A sound came from your throat you’d never heard before, and his grip tightened on your hair. He quickly yanked you off of him, oxygen filling your lungs with a sharp stab. Coughing and trying to catch your breath you look up at him, unsure of what had gone wrong.
"What? What’s wrong?” You questioned him, worried you had somehow messed up.
“What happened?" You clutched your hands to his thighs as you stared intently, searching his face for an answer. Had you done something wrong? Did you mess up? Your thoughts filled with worry.
His eyes darkened with desire, cloudy with unspoken longing, while his mouth remained slightly open in awe. You observed, a pang of uncertainty gnawing at your insides as you met his gaze.
Doubt and desire knotted within you as you awaited his next move. His hand still buried in your hair as he chuckled deep and lowly, his voice sounding of the harshest silk.
"You said this was your first time?" He questioned.
You nodded your head in agreement.
'How is that possible?' He thought to himself, 'I felt the back of her throat. I felt it. She didn’t fight when I forced her to stay choking.'
His thoughts ran wild with excitement as his hand pulled tightly at your hair, his next words came out… well, in no other way than demanding.
"Open."
he commanded, sending a jolt of electricity coursing through you as you obediently complied. You had no reason not to oblige as you opened your mouth, letting your tongue drape across your bottom lip. With each breathless moment that passes, you find yourself teetering on the edge of surrender, torn between the intoxicating pull of desire and the lingering echoes of hesitation. He began smacking his tip on your tongue, a wet thwacking sound filling his small chamber.
“Just-Relax” His voice was sweet yet held a sternness to it.
His mouth slowly parted as he let his cock enter your mouth ever so slightly just to pull it back out, raking it across your soaking tongue. His other hand gripped his robe tightly, trying to keep it on his chest and out of your way.
“You know you messed up,” Anakin let his hips rock slowly into you, small groans leaving his plump lips in between his words.
“Now that I know you can take me, you’re never leaving my sight,”
The words left his lips and flowed through the air like a cold breeze on a hot day, it made goosebumps trickle all over your body.
The taste of his cock was foreign to your tastebuds; you weren’t sure how to feel about the new taste. Anakin's grip on your hair tightened as he guided you to take his full length into your throat once again. This time was harder than the last; it was like he grew in the small amount of time he wasn’t in your mouth. Disregarding your attempts to breathe, he held you firmly, staring down at you. His eyes clouded with lust as his mouth continued to murmur slurs one after the other.
"Fuck. Mmm shit… yes, like that, such a good girl," He could feel every time your throat retracted; it was sending him over the edge as he let himself sit in the back of your throat. He roughly started thrusting his hips into your face, getting as deep into your throat as he could before quickly pulling off again. As he exited your mouth you let out a deep cough, drool still pooling down your chin and covering your neck. You tried taking multiple breaths to regain some composure, but Anakin didn’t want to see you composed.. no, quite the opposite, he wanted to see you completely overwrought and undone.
Without warning, his firm grasp on your hair forces you back onto his member with relentless urgency. Leaving you no time to prepare as he fucked your throat at an impatient pace. When he wasn’t holding his cock as deep as it would get in the back of your throat, he was holding you tightly in place as he rocked his hips into you, desperately trying to chase his climax.
Your eyes burned with tears, and your throat cried for some kind of release. Your gags and chokes were sounds of unholy scripture to his ears and it gave him exactly what he needed to release deep into your throat. He threw his head back as his groans rippled deep, he practically growled your name out.
It didn’t take much for you to swallow his load, he was so deep into your throat it was practically in your stomach by the time it exited him. Even after his release, his hand stayed firmly grasped to the back of your head, not letting you move an inch off of his cock as he pulsed in your mouth.
“Oh yeah, you’re mine,”
Anakin’s words were hazy to your ears as his chest heaved with deep labored breaths. Your arms shot up to his thighs, trying to push off; your lungs begging for oxygen and your body reacting to its signals. He refused to release his grip for what seemed like an eternity, though in reality, only a few seconds had passed as he kept you in place.
With a forceful tug, he pulled your head back, tilting your face up to meet his gaze. Your face was covered in spit and tears. He thought you had never looked more beautiful, never more stunning than right now. His chest continued heaving as he dropped his robe down, his other hand remaining firmly around your hair. Your eyes flickered up to his as you tried desperately to catch your breath. Anakin had never looked more extraordinary in your eyes, the sweat glistening off his eyebrows as his lips curved into a delicious smirk.
The smirk deepened as he surveyed the masterpiece he had created on your face, a scene straight out of a movie, one he couldn’t take his eyes off. Anakin’s eyes dancing with ecstasy, his breaths coming in ragged gasps as he tried to slow his heart rate.
“Your mouth will only ever know my dick,” He said proudly.
“Do you understand?” His words echoed in your mind, a heady mix of validation and vulnerability washing over you in waves as he used his now free hand to caress your liquid-covered cheeks.
Just like the post canon homestuck photos..
[comes crawling out of the podcast covered in blood] its really good you should listen
auto suggest bewilders me
No worries! I'm out walking
🚶🏻♀️🚶🏻♂️
my one skill is expertly manipulating the shape of the eggs I’m cooking so that they fit perfectly onto my toast every time
Bow down to your king
I can’t stop outdoing myself
Remember that post? The one that said “what if we all have super powers but they’re so mundane we don’t realize?” That post? This is proof that post was right
Thank god he’s a yugioh fan he can be saved
Ep.01.02- Dungeons And D.A.D.D.I.E.S.
