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Just My Socks

@clemsdisaster

~Icon by razcham~
~Art blog @spiritualsweetness~
~Clem’s (now) reblog account~
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bi-eru
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nicolegendary

okay i’ve just had such a perfect idea for the layout of a wedding ceremony that i drew a diagram and will now describe it

so a traditional set up for a ceremony would look like this, with the audience lined up in front of the couple, and divided in the middle to make a path for the bride to come down and be given away by her father to the groom

instead, i propose (ohhh puns) a set up more like this:

where the audience is on either side (which halves the distance that the farthest person is from the action) and at the same time you can have each half of the couple come down aisles on opposite sides and both be given away by their parents to each other (which takes away all the gross sexist and hetero-normative crap)

just… isn’t that way better???

Me and my spouse-to-be making our way to the altar:

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clemsdisaster
#reblog
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reblogged

Agent 3: If you took a shot for every time you made a bad decision, how drunk would you be right now?

Marina: Maybe a little tipsy…

Marie: Drunk.

Callie: Wasted.

Pearl: Dead.

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snowthefirst

signs of a shutdown in autistic people

  • Becoming less verbal or nonverbal
  • Looking “spaced out” or detached from what’s happening 
  • Withdrawing, not wanting to be around people
  • Curling up in the fetal position
  • Hiding out under furniture, blankets, etc. 

And no, person observing above-mentioned signs, there’s nothing you can do to help. Except go away.

The “go away” bit is good for making a point, since it points out that not intervening is better than trying to intervene and making things worse. That said - some things drawn from my own experience:

  • As a few other posters have said, if the person shutting down is in a crowded, noisy, or otherwise threatening place, remove them to somewhere calmer and safer. Be gentle, since physical contact can make sensory overload worse.
  • Try not to ask too many difficult questions (and please do not ask them anything that could wait until later). Being in a shut down often makes executive dysfunction or language processing issues worse; even simple yes-or-no questions can be difficult to handle, either because it is frustrating to process the words, or to make a decision. Do not assume that they haven’t heard you if they don’t respond immediately.
  • I, personally, tend to be more prone to withdrawing or becoming irritable when I haven’t had food lately. If you know the person in question well enough to evaluate this, take this into consideration. The one question that’s always welcome to me is “do you want food?”. Not “have you eaten lately?” (requires memory + categorization), and not “what can I get you?” (requires decision making).

Most importantly: Do not trivialize or try to blame them for what is happening. This is severely damaging toward trust, and if an autistic person has a bad experience with you while they’re experiencing a meltdown or other episode, they may no longer feel safe around you. Your presence may make a subsequent episode worse if they have a bad history with you. If you suspect you’re not capable of responding apffpropriately (and if you are neurotypical and don’t know the person in question very well, you are in this category by default!), it is a wiser choice to leave.

By far the most important thing you can do to support an autistic friend who is having a shutdown is to have talked with this person before they experience a shutdown so that you have a plan in place and both of you understand what to expect in case of emergency. Do this when you both feel emotionally safe. Discuss your plans on a regular basis to reinforce your own preparedness and to reinforce a sense of predictability and security in your friend.

Basically, treat your friend like a human being rather than as a generic cluster of symptoms. Don’t interact with them in a way that is dictated by their diagnosis. Instead, ask them what they need from you, as an individual.

also some indicators that an autistic person is shutting down:

  • signs that their auditory processing isn’t working as well as it typically does, including frequently asking for things to be repeated for clarification (obviously the context matters with this one–if this is in a loud room or a room with several noises going on at once/if it’s a situation where most people would do this, then it’s likely not a sign of a shutdown, especially if no other signs are present)
  • not being able to give clear answers (ex. more frequent use of “i don’t know/care/understand”)
  • more difficulty processing what they’re seeing than is usual (can’t think of indicators of this)
  • having a harder time/not being able to read
  • basically anything indicating that their processing isn’t working as well as usual
  • obvious signs of increased anxiety/distress (rapid stimming, concerning expressions–looking expressionless, teary, angry, and/or frustrated, getting easily frustrated, unusual tone of voice/speech patterns)

most of these are signs i (sometimes) recognize in myself when i’m close to shutting down

and it’s important to remember that a couple of these doesn’t necessarily mean someone is shutting down, especially considering these should be changes and not just what’s typical for the person in question (ex. having constant problems processing audio)

some people also have individualized indicators, which you can find out by (as the previous commenter suggested) talking to/asking them

and if an autistic person tells you that they’re close to a shutdown or meltdown and they need something (to be somewhere with less stimulation, food/liquids, something to stim with, etc.) but they aren’t showing any signs of it, believe them anyway

some of us are very good at hiding these signs (sometimes without even realizing it) for the sake of passing as neurotypical (even if the situation doesn’t call for that), and taking our word for it/listing to us in order to help us through a shutdown or meltdown is the best thing you can do in these situations

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autistics-speak

For me a flat affect/not emoting “appropriately” in face or voice is an early warning sign that I’m overloading and may be shutting down, often before I even notice it myself. If someone who knows me notices and asks if I’m shutting down that can be really helpful to me, as once I realize what’s going on it’s less difficult to identify what I need to do to handle it.

#reblog#reference#ref
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Tag Game

go to this website and design yourself https://picrew.me/image_maker/9889 and then tag 4 people 

@the-erikalypse @ethan-loves-you @sugarnitwitch @fanbun (Only if u want too ) 

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space-sweetheart

Thanks for the tag @heartstringsymphonies !!! ❤

Tagging @peachie-doodles @aoi-hina @taxevasionism @xeensbin (only if you want too of course!)

thanks cutie!! i’ll tag @the-ratties-hideout @starlovez @lilacindulgence @trashduckie *only if you want!!*

Thana, wearing something slightly different for once (attending festivities in a blanket burrito is frowned upon)

uhhh @dokiquents, @dugeunqx, @teawithsugarships, and @maryonmain if you guys want to or whatever gshdgjs

Hail the prince!!

uhh sorry if i tag anyone who doesn’t wanna b tagged feel free to ignore this djhfbvjhfb @harmoniaswife @haileyotakubeebe @lildreamysoul @atmospheric-light

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lildreamysoul

I’m genuinely so happy that this one had an option to put bags under your eyes; finally it’s mE

@gothgfships @nougatships @darlingselfshipper @selfinsertproton (only if you guys want to)

ówò

Again, idk who to tag so do it if you wanna!!

you know i had to do it to em

tagging uuuuuuuuh @mantashipping @d0nna-ake @idrawsinandimproud and @selfinsertheaven sorry if youve been tagged already lmao

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lunarpanda

Pand time!! Gotta use a mask for those panda markings. h.

@yoshis @tsunkitty @willoryn @karamatsu-pearl 

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willoryn

AAA You all look so cute!! ;3;

@mysterygreentea @girl-in-a-hoodie1 @clownmoontoon @starfairywitch and anyone else who wants to do it!!!

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clownmoontoon

I AM HERE TO BRING THE WHOLESOME CHAOS ♡

THIS IS SO FUN AAA TY FOR THE TAG ♡♡♡

i taaagg @rotten-dan @pinktatertots99 @mapleshmaple @smellslikebeetroot

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pinktatertots99

AWWWWWWWWWW TYSM LJKFDJLKFLKJS -finally do something with my nanba sona-

tag: @mercysorrows @sugarpinkbloodtea @nurseruthie14 and @iiconfettii

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mercysorrows

Thank yaa

It'sa me!

Tag: @fr33-w1ll @thatlittledandere

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thatlittledandere

Real tempted to erase all responses to make this shorter but I don’t have the heart…

Yee tagging @kuudessilma @ioryuutrash @the-hebrew-impact-frame @crazy-grrrl-on-the-computer

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floweryuu

Doing it on my main instead but gosh I wish I could have a dress like that tagging @rupko and @j-ellyfish

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j-ellyfish
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kyuhu

Thanks for the tag!! I like how I look 100 times better here than I actually do 👌

I Tag @flaushling @thequickbutt @rosiethero @scarlettlillies only if you want to of course! If not just ignore this c’:

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thequickbutt

Oh no, I’m cute 😭 thanks for the tag! I’m tagging, uh…

@clemsdisaster @thirdeyebullshittery @glitchygengar and uhhh @just-themys ???? Only if you wanna~

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clemsdisaster

I have no right to look cute djdjjsjd thanks for tagging me!

@le-musical-nerd @starrysartblog

#reblog#image#long
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