cannot decide on how to stylize this man

Religious art leaves out the best part and it’s such a goddamn shame. Livestock, Agriculture and Food is an integral part of any culture and we all need to be pushing for more realistic sheep in religious art. #FATTAILSFORJESUS

“How think ye? If a man have a hundred sheep and one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains and listen for the clappeth of it’s itinerant cheeks?” - Matthew 18:12, the bible

CLAPPETH….

I made this post a long time ago and never posted the follow up post, so here it is. Additional info on Fat tail sheep

Fat tailed sheep is not a single specific breed of sheep. It’s a catchall word like “Health care worker”.

There’s tons and tons of different breeds. They all store fat in their tails, but fall into two main categories: WIDE tails and LONG tails

Wide tails store fat in the rump area and have no visible tails.

Long tails store fat in the tail itself, which vary in length in different breeds. In the olden days, people took pride in breeding sheep with the longest tail. They are not so popular today as it’s hard to find a decent tail cart on Amazon.

Speaking of Tail carts, they come in different styles and designs. We dont have any that are actually preserved, but old drawing of them show different wheels harnesses.

Some of them are literally just skateboards

Back in the day, breeding sheep with long dragging tails was all the rage. Nowadays different tails types have been developed to prevent them from dragging their tails on the ground. Such as the “folded tail” or the “Only fat at the base” Tail

Despite fat tail sheep being the most common sheep breeds in the world, most people in the west have never heard of them. The West likes Wool Sheep. Fat tails are strictly meat sheep and have little useful wool. They also do poorly in colder climates

There’s a huge community of shepherds on youtube that script, choreograph and shoot elaborate videos for their sheep complete uplifting music to highlight their best qualities (for sale and stud) It is fantastic. Such as this one:

People kept bringing up Fat Bottomed Girls. Ya’ll are wrong. These are fat bottomed BOYS. Sheep are often continuously bred, so the females are constantly getting pregnant, giving birth and nursing.

That’s very hard on the body, so they can’t build up as much fat as the boys.

The fattest sheep, the ones with the truly VAST tails, rocking them little carts are ALWAYS males.

This is why the Bible specifically states that ONLY the rumps of the Males are to fit to be offered to the lord……

Picture: God desiring the tail

“And he shall offer of the sacrifice of the peace offering an offering made by fire unto the LORD; the fat thereof, and the WHOLE rump” -Leviticus 3:9

I mean… look.

Arguably these are just minor details and doesnt matter….

But beyond it’s teachings the bible is also a work of literature about life in the ancient world. And on some level these kinds of small details bring a sort of richness to these depictions of real…

Ancient people bred out sheep with huge butts, took the largest sheep butts, set them on fire and prayed over the burning butt. It checks out.

I did indeed finish the Chreon

RESIDENT EVIL CHALLENGE: Scenes, 4|5

➤ Resident Evil: Vendetta, 2017

Away

Incoming

turning this into a poll because i am just so beyond baffled right now.

At the gate for my flight home from visiting friends and there's a woman here with a service Shiba Inu. No pics because he has a Do Not Disturb vest and taking pics of strangers is illegal but I need to stress how ON DUTY this animal is. Ears up. Eyes doing Lazer scans of everything. Examining everyone who passes within 10ft like a security guard. Ass planted on her feet. I have never seen a dog with such intense chivalric guardian energy before. He has tiny eyebrows and they are FURROWED with concentration.

Man behind me having unhinged phone conversation. There is an internationally famous dairy in the area I was visiting and he was commissioned by the lady on the other end of the phone to collect specific cheeses from there. The lady is very high strung about the type and condition of the cheese.

The man does not know from cheese. The man "ain't never seen no cheese but orange before" and "I showed ya list to the cheese lady so if it's wrong it's her fault ok?"

I am 80% sure she sent him there for a really specific bleu cheese, 40% sure he does not have the very specific bleu cheese, and 100% sure he's done with her shit.

Our flight is delayed.

He does not have the cheeses in a cooler, just a regular backpack.

I need to emphasize that there is no cooler bag in the backpack. He has Jansport backpack that is jam-packed with cheeses. There is apparently $405 dollars worth of cheeses in that backpack, which I know because he has been trying to get the lady to venmo him the expense, which she has failed to do. It is unclear whether his relation to the lady is romantic, familial or what, but I'm leaning towards "what".

Two more people have joined us. One is a very elegant man with a perfect manicure in a tailored business suit, the other is a neon-haired person of indeterminate gender wearing a fox kirigumi. The Shiba Inu has been staring at the latter for three minutes now.

Uh oh.

Cheese man has been demanding payment because apparently he went like six hours out of his way and paid with his own money and between the cheese and price of gas, he is pretty sure he does not have enough money in his account for an Uber home.

The lady is FLABBERGASTED that he is demanding payment at all, as she was under the impression he was doing this for her out of the goodness of his heart.

He's not having it. He's insisting she told him she would pay him back- he would have gotten her maybe one cheese somewhere closer to his business in the area out of love, but he went out of his way because she agreed to pay him costs+ extra to cover it.

HE RECORDED THE CONVERSATION IN WHICH SHE PROMISED TO PAY FOR THE CHEESE, SHE'S THAT MUCH OF A FLAKE.

I am about to offer this man cash for some of these cheeses because our flight is now more delayed.

"YOU ALWAYS DO THIS! YOU ALWAYS DO THIS AND I FALL FOR IT EVERY TIME! NO! NO! FUCK YOU! IF YOU'RE NOT GONNA PAY ME, YOU DON'T GET FANCY CHEESE."

"OR ELSE WHAT?"

"I'm gonna-? THE BABY SHOWER? MONICA CAN'T EVEN HAVE THIS CHEESE SHE'S PREGNANT!"

"The cheese lady asked if it was for someone because the mushrooms or whatever in the cheese are dangerous for the baby or something?? You wanna poison Monica?"

"WHY WOULD I LIE ABOUT THAT?"

"YEAH OF COURSE I GOT THE CHEESE, THATS WHY I DON'T GOT MONEY FOR UBER!"

"YEAH, GO TELL! GO TELL MOMMA I STOPPED YOUR STUPID ASS FROM KILLING MONICA OR THE BABY! FUCK!"

*hangs up phone*

*head in hands, borderline hyperventilating*

The man in the three piece suit is in the chair next to him. He waits a moment, then reaches into his carryon and pulls out an entire bottle of wine with the TSA pre check sticker on it, and taps cheese guy on the shoulder.

"If your friend doesn't want it, would you be amenable to having it right now?"

Naturally, I have volunteered my box of wheat thins and offered to buy one of the harder cheeses which should be fine if it makes it home.

Meanwhile, Kirigumi has noticed that the Shiba Inu is staring at her and is correctly intimidated.

1. This is some fucking great Camembert. I have compensated cheese guy accordingly. So have like six other people. He's recouped like half his losses.

2. Cheese guy is crying a little about the cash and opening up about his problems. The cheese lady is his younger sister. Suit guy is being very generous with his Pinot Blanc. We are having a picnic/improv family therapy session.

3. This is apparently the latest in a long string of his sister asking for something and then flaking when he asks to be paid back. Started with paying him back only some of what he was owed, then claiming something she paid for him was of equal value when it was not, then recently telling him his memory is wrong and he said it was a gift or that he'd do it for free.

"Yeah, the specific thing of trying to convince you your memory is unreliable is called gaslighting and it's really fucked up." I say

"yeeeeah. The other stuff I forgave because she's never really had a good job so she can't pay me back all the time but at least she was making an effort y'know? But that was. That was over the line."

"If you haven't already, check on the rest of your family's finances. My brother started trying to gaslight everyone when he started stealing from our parents." Says Pinot Blanc.

4. Shiba Inu Lady has purchased a cheddar. Apparently, the dog's name is Donut, and he's her service dog because she's severely visually impaired.

"Oh, he's a guide dog?" Asks cheese guy.

"oh, no." She laughs. "He's too short, and the way my eyes are, it's easier for me to navigate with a cane. No, the problem I have is that some morally impaired people see the cane and think they can get away with stealing my bag or assaulting me because I wouldn't be able to give a description- which is wrong, but rather than deal with that I got Donut, and he helps me by howling at anyone who gets in my personal space and biting anyone who grabs me!"

"Uh." Says Kirigumi. "He's been staring at me do I need to back up or..?"

"Ohdear! No, no- He wasn't looking at you! He loves cheese but he knows he's not supposed to beg so he decided the way to deal with something he wants but can't have is to stare in the other direction."

"OKAY!" Says Kirigumi. "I'm wearing fox pajamas and thought like. He thought I was another dog or something."

"No, no- he doesn't care about dogs, and you get a warning before he goes for the calves. Very helpful, when I was living in Italy!"

"Oh what part? I have family in Tuscany." Says Pinot.

"Does he want a cheese? There is still so much cheese." Says cheese guy.

Plane may be arriving. I am paying for in flight WiFi to keep y'all updated.

1. Cheese guy has sold all but two or three cheeses that he an Pinot are going to eat on the flight.

2. I know they're planning to continue because Pinot talked to the gate agent so he and cheese guy can sit together and talk about family drama and cheese.

3. Pinot has been teaching him about different types of cheese and how to enjoy them.

4. Cheese guy apparently repairs computers and other technology devices for a living and is currently doing the software version of scraping barnacles and other crap off Pinot'macbook.

5. Pinot is now convinced that cheese guy is the smartest and most interesting man in the world.

Ok so the Wifi wasn't working on the plane (also like, nonstop turbulence) and also they got seated in a different row from me, but:

:)

Anyway, it's 2AM, I need to sleep, if you feel like supporting this kind of hard-hitting reporting, I have a Tip Jar!

Another inimitable epic from @gallusrostromegalus.

Cheese guy and Pinot are my new otp 😭❤️

I freaking love Camembert, but I love even more Donut's job description.

(And there was only one bed for a second?! Even better.)

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My language has a saying that roughly translates to "a woman is at death's door when she gives birth".

The pregnancy process - and by extension, the baby it makes - is already a potential threat to a woman's life. Saying that the baby poses no threat to the mother makes you ignorant of basic human anatomy and female reproductive biology in particular.

we should talk about water more often that shit is crazy

it is literally one of the most normal things

you can’t even begin to understand how insane water is

Water as a molecule has SO many absolutely bonkers properties that no other substance has and it's that combo that makes life as we know it possible in this universe. that shit IS crazy.

Solid water floats in liquid water. that's not normal. It expands and arranges a repeating lattice structure that creates a crystal which isn't super strange but it drops in density by 11% which is. It's polarized. It dissolves EVERYTHING. The latent heat properties are insane. the emergent properties are also insane. the nitrogen cycle takes a whole bunch of effort and enzymatic processing, but the water cycle runs off the sun and the chill of space.

Just because you are a bunch of squishy bags of complicated water, doesn't make that a normal thing to be. the vast majority of the universe does not have that. water is very VERY special.