lesbian activities

anyways .. vampire ladies.. my window is open and my neck is very biteable .. if u were wondering

it’s so hard being your father’s son (female)

Me, watching my kitten hold still for a suspiciously long time: Ollie, are you peeing on my floor?

Ollie: Not

Me: Are you sure?

Ollie, grunting through time and space to push out a chocolate mcmuffin wider than he is tall: Not

Me, helpless, arms full of hot chili: Ollie, no! Ollie no! No, Ollie! God, Jesus, Ollie! Ollie, nooo!!

Ollie:

Artist's recreation of incident

Oh sorry was that your dominant romance hero? Whoops, I made him a switch. Yeah I took your uptight controlling man and I put him on his knees with a wild shine in his eyes and a flush spreading across the divot of his fluttering throat. Hope that’s alright.

As a lesbian, it’s happened twice already that one “guy” stands out to me and I think “huh maybe they’re kinda cute and interesting, I wanna get to know them” and then I get to know them better and it’s a closeted trans girl who I somehow sniffed with my little nonbinary lesbian nose

IT JUST HAPPENED FOR A THIRD TIME!!!!

You guys will never believe what just happened to me

What does it mean if every “man” I’ve been attracted to was actually a trans woman? Idk what this says about my sexual orientation but it does mean I have astounding egg-dar

Gays being able to detect trans people of our preferred gender and being able to feel preemptive attraction to them is a phenomenon I was not aware extended to people beyond me

I mean the poor groom’s bride is a horse, but go off I guess

Well let’s look at it this way, I mean technically our carriage is saved.

well this calls for some oats

so pull the slack rein

I chime in with a “what are you people even doing in a hospital corridor?”

ⓘ A sewing machine is a device that provides a several-fold increase of the speed at which you can make mistakes

i don't smoke for the obvious reasons of not wanting to develop an addiction to nicotine but god do i so often feel the emotion 'i need a cigarette'.

trevor belmont

.

ugh i can't stand this bastard he's so cunty. in a really unwashed and sad kinda way

Rabbits and triangles🐇

“and the universe said…”

hey sorry we put your boyfriend on a show where the game changes every time. yeah he has no idea what game he’s about to play. but he’ll be fine once he realizes the only way to win is by learning, the only way to learn is by playing, and the only way to begin is by beginning. yeah actually we’ll be beginning without further ado but you can pick him up after. sorry again.

they should make an international travel that is free if you're internet friends