Three Dogs In A Trench Coat

did i tell u guys i got into an argument on twitter bc i said foxes are dogs and someone tried to bring up their actual fuckin. classification or whatever and i just said “foxes are dogs cause they are fluffye” and they kept arguing with me. the entire time i was like “you will not survive the immigration to tumblr you are lucky we are not there right now”

This is especially funny because they aren’t even right. Foxes *ARE* dogs.

No they aren’t.

yes they are. because they are fluffye.

OK yes they are.

Dog

Dog

Different family, but same order as @pictures-of-dogs

No, they are the same family. They are the same kingdom, phylum, order and family. They separate at the genus.

They’re a dog.

yeah they’re fluffye

theyre literally not dogs theyre not even fluffy. can we get science tumblr over hear or what!?

checkmate athiests

fluffye

okay but they literally are dogs, for those who are confused

If foxes are dogs, then so are wolves, coyotes, dingoes, jackals, and several other extant and extinct species.

Behold! A dog.

of course it’s a dog you buffoon. it’s fluffye.

Why on earth would someone think “BUT IF THEY’RE DOGS SO AR -”

Like yes of course wolves are dogs, where have you been. Jackals are excellent doggies! So are coyotes. Why is this confusing.

I love that this is literally two completely different arguments running simultaneously.

That guy up there who said they’re not even fluffy was thinking of sharks

sharks are also dogs. ravenous water dogs, but still dogs

Sharks can NOT be dogs they are SMOOTH

Tags via @jenroses

sharks are smooth dogs

BEHOLD, a SHARK

guy who has mistaken adrenaline for love and isn’t interested in correcting the mistake

love is when you’re wrestling for control of the gun and there’s only one bullet left. love is when you grab the knife theyre swinging at you by the blade and look into their eyes and laugh. love is when someone is so obsessed with you they have to kill you. love is [he is forcibly escorted off the stage by armed guards]

So at a party it is socially acceptable to just silently join a circle of people talking and contribute to the conversation when you feel like it as if you already know everyone in the circle, btw.

If you want to know people’s names at some point saying “Sorry, did I catch your name?” or “Sorry, what was your name again?” like you’ve briefly been introduced before is a good move.

Conversation openers for starting a conversation with a random person next to you:

Fr? On god? Just like that?

Yeah, just act like you’ve been there the whole time.

I have social anxiety and discovered this by trial and error despite my fears. I took on this burden for all of you so you don’t have to. Trust me. Just stand in the gap in the circle. It’s waiting for you. It’s an event where people are expecting to meet other people. It’s not creepy or weird. They’re there to talk to strangers and friends alike. Just step into the circle.

Shoutout to Baldurs Gate 3 for having a magical girl transformation sequence but instead of a teenager in a short skirt it's a lesbian aasimar paladin in full plate about to open 13 cans of fucking whoop ass

Better with sound

a polycule divorcing is called a mutiny

They’ve unionized.

at the start of the game karlach and astarion are absolutely fucking reeling from being suddenly freed and are in a state of manic joy that would probably seem alien to them like a week ago, while gale has been locked in his depression tower for so long he's almost completely forgotten how to talk to people. shadowheart has not a single fucking clue whats going on because shar keeps slurping up her memories and lae'zel is literally in the midst of her ultimate nightmare scenario and trapped on an alien planet with a bunch of jackasses who have no idea whats happening. so almost everyone has experienced a situational personality shift and isn't quite the person they were a year before you met them. EXCEPT Wyll. Who is just like "this isnt even the weirdest thing thats happened to me this month." my man got scooped up, tadpoled, and slammed back and said "oh well, not gonna ruin my day" and went about his business teaching self defense to children and slaying evil beasts. He didn't even seem confused he literally did not give a shit. no urgency. He's like "I'll put that in my day planner but is gonna have to wait until after i hunt down this demon." When you recruit him there is no sense of "oh man we really gotta help each other because we have the same problem" he just would have said yes because you asked and he's wyll. Or because you told him he could kill mindflayers. He'd be like "sick" and done, no questions asked. Just another Tuesday for the blade.

my character: *doing literally anything*

astarion in the background:

The thing that Baldur's Gate got right is that each companion is both extremely cool, tempered with an appropriate dose of cringe.

Gale is a powerful wizard. He uses the phrase 'pish posh' unironically.

Lae'zel is a badass. She asks you to fight her and then gets emotional because you're fighting even though that was her idea.

Karlach. Badass. But we've all seen her idle dance moves.

Wyll is this swashbuckling vigilante and he has a pose he does whenever he says his own superhero name.

Shadowheart. Dark backstory, still striving so hard for the light. Makes a joke about poisonous flowers that falls incredibly flat.

Astarion. Capable rogue and a dangerous vampire. He practises his one-liners ahead of time. Within earshot of the people he wants to use them on.

The strength economy is in shambles.

100% Karlach just thinks a deathmatch is a fun friendly time

"I'm going to play Dark Urge, I'm going to play a Drow, I'm going to play a Half Elf Cleric of Selune-" No. I grow tired of filling Faerun with hotties and encouraging my party's fatherless behavior.

To remedy this I have made Your Dad, the ultimate 1:1 replica of the average New Jersey father to save the realm and put a stop to my party's sad, horny business.

And before you can even ask "oh what is the Guardian Your Mom or something" of fucking course she is you fool

do you guys think jesus, the son of a carpenter, smelt the wood of the cross & temporarily thought of home

This is killing me

@wolfythewitch

I've thought about this!! The reason people seemed to empathize more with that post and with my art in general is because it humanizes Jesus in a way the church just absolutely tries to stray away from. A big part of Jesus' entire story is his humanity. It's why Satan tried to tempt him. It's why he could feel hunger and thirst. It's why he loved and was loved. It's why he had to die. He was betrayed with a kiss, with a greeting. He shared meals with his disciples. He had parents and siblings and aunts and uncles and cousins. He bled. And a big part of humanity is connection. We as humans are always looking for reflections of ourselves in others, it's how we connect and understand each other. We gravitate towards it. Of course we'll love the human side of him more. We're human

listen. aging into your thirties rocks. yes your joints get a little creaky. yes you can’t sleep in a pretzel on the floor anymore after a concert or a convention. and you lose some friends. but the thing is that you sort out who your real friends are and you sort out who you really are. and you get to see your friends settling into careers they like, and adopt new dogs and cats, and you find a job you can stand, and get really good at arts and crafts, and maybe that book you loved as a kid gets a movie deal and it doesn’t suck, and you learn to like new food and bake your own bread, and you realize that the great portfolio of self harm scars you all used to curate are going white with age and not updated, and half your friends are a different gender now and so much happier and maybe you are too, and you know who you are, and that it’s a journey and not a revelation. it’s a direction you’re headed, and you’re enjoying the trip.

reaching your 30′s rocks. and i’m hearing good things about what comes next, too.

i am looking into your eyes, i am holding your hand. i absolutely promise.

if you can just live long enough, your soul will build your body into a home. you will live there and you will find a way to be at peace. it’s worth the time and it’s worth the work. i promise.

Your soul will build your body into a home.

ayo i found 2 pages with head angles of humans and animals, could be useful to anyone reading this

hoomans

animals