Books to help you deal with life when you have ADHD (totally not free 👀)

I think it needs to become common knowledge that "inability to read social cues" can show up as overcompensating.

You don't know how much misbehaviour is allowed, so you become the perfect child who never tests rules.

You don't know if someone is irritated with you, so you'll be extra generous and self-effacing.

You don't know how much is expected of you at work so you'll kill yourself in a minimum-wage job and not notice that nobody else is working like this.

"Hardworking and quiet" should be as much of an autism red flag as "ignores rules and doesn't know when to stop talking". Or why don't we just start using words to communicate so i can stop tracking everybody's eyebrow twitches, that would be great.

Bear with me the end point of this is an encouragement to anyone, not a lecture :) read the whole thing

Others can help you a lot. They can give you the things you need, the support you need, an environment that is better for you to grow in. But they can’t fix you or solve you or “make” you better. Because YOU have to accept their help, YOU have to decide to improve, YOU have to try, nobody can do that part for you and nobody can fix you without you working WITH them. So. That means. YOU can take pride where you have improved, and you can take pride in the fact that despite ALL the crap and suffering that has fallen over your life YOU still made it to where you are and YOU have been strong enough to keep striving and reaching and trying and it has paid off BECAUSE of YOU. You aren’t JUST lucky you have good friends, you aren’t ONLY where you are because of the things they did for you. They helped you but you RESPONDED in kind. So be grateful but be proud of yourself too, and when you feel like everything is awful sometimes and you need a pick-me-up maybe it’ll help to remember that you have gotten as far as you are by your own power and by your own will. You were the one who was strong enough.

UH WHAT

UH...... WHAT.........

This entire article is eye-opening, even as someone who has ADHD and has read a lot about it already. There's so much more there than just the bit about the glucose-craving brain. SO. MUCH.

This might have been the bit that hit me hardest, actually:

I feel SEEN. OTZ

Seriously, though. Read the whole thing. It's a good one.

Add to this that it's not just that your brain says "I don't want to"- the prefrontal cortex literally shuts OFF.

Source

When you just do the bare essentials for keeping a relatively tidy area, and then 11pm go full detail hyperfocus “clean all the things” mode, and you feel like you can attack the gods afterwards

The autistic/ADHD paradox 2:

I love organising things, but I don’t like my stuff being too organised.

Idk what logic is that. I mean I just like the sensation of my stuffs being organised but I don’t like it too like a room template.

🌼Self Care Tips🌼

* get some fresh air! be it a walk, or just opening your windows, or even sitting in your garden.

* change your bedding. fresh sheets, a new blanket, anything clean.

* empty your bin. if you have a bin in your bedroom, empty it.

* grab a glass of water! it’s boring, but it’s refreshing and cleansing.

* brush your teeth (if you can). or just use some mouthwash, or have a mint.

Every character i ever write will inevetably be neuro divergent coded because i can not for the life of me figure out how the fuck neuro typical people funktion.

trying to be sad on main enough for people to take the hint that im Not Okay but not too dramatic enough as to annoy people or make them think they need to call an ambulance

Same homie 😅

i hate that i have no volume control. i try so, so hard to reel it in but when im happy, excited, relaxed, comfortable, etc. i talk and laugh loud. it’s as involuntary as laughter. i don’t realize until i get shushed, then i feel like my heart got stomped on. it’s so frustrating because i KNOW it is annoying but can’t seem to help it. getting called on it always takes me from happy to feeling awful in a millisecond

it's always fun to have my most intense feelings of happiness and joy tamped down by someone coming into the room and saying "JESUS YOU'RE SO LOUD CAN YOU KEEP IT DOWN THE NEIGHBORS CAN HEAR"

Like shit, I'm sorry me trying to have a good time is inherently disturbing to everyone around me. That feels great.

Me, not talking: Ah fuck, I am being weird

Me, talking: Ah fuck, I am being weird

the fact that I have to be in the “right headspace” to do even the simplest tasks. absolutely humiliating

Fuck this one hits home.

me

i hate that i have no volume control. i try so, so hard to reel it in but when im happy, excited, relaxed, comfortable, etc. i talk and laugh loud. it’s as involuntary as laughter. i don’t realize until i get shushed, then i feel like my heart got stomped on. it’s so frustrating because i KNOW it is annoying but can’t seem to help it. getting called on it always takes me from happy to feeling awful in a millisecond