Guess who crawled out of the abyss?

whenever i take off my pants and i unbuckle my belt i feel like a corporate ceo about to get his dick sucked

as someone who got 2 concussions this year and inhaled toxic substances at the workplace i can confidently inform you all that all characters in the star wars prequels are absolved of stupidity. they're all dumb as a box of rocks but its not their fault that no one made them wear helmets in wartime. the introduction of SPOSHA (space OSHA) would reduce incidences of darth vader creation by at least one i just know it

"anakin shouldn't have done that" he was huffing space gasoline at age 7 literally what did you expect. "obi-wan shouldn't have done that" he literally goes through a window face first in episode 2. "padme shouldn't have done that" she's had a career since she was 10

OVER 20? i thought that shit was at 14 god's honest truth. which is bad enough but WORSE? holy shit. you could fucking fly a jet plane through the holes in his brain, legend has it if you get a brain scan on that man the scarring on his frontal lobe spells out 'HELP.' fucking 20+? that live fast die young ass motherfucker. born with a job, broke both legs by 6, death NASCAR career by 9, logged his first kill at 11, married at 19, 20+ workplace electrocutions by 22. installs his first authoritarian government by 22. overachieving but in all the wrong fields only. i mean 20+? that man hasn't walked in a straight line in years. holy fuck man. 20+? yeeeeeeeeeeesh. holy shit. fuck

i've crunched the numbers and analyzed the situations man and i tell you i ran this in the most favorable of conditions. assuming this boy turned 19 literally 5 minutes before AOTC picks up and Space Years can be substituted by our years, and by '20+' we mean 21, this dude gets electrocuted every 7.4 weeks. dude...... like bro. like man.

HEY SO IT WASN'T FAVORABLE CONDITIONS APPARENTLY IT WAS FUCKING 30 TIMES FOR A RATE OF 1 ELECTROCUTION EVERY 5 WEEKS HAHAHAHAHAHA

the girls...

one of the weird things i noticed watching the phantom menace yesterday is that when he first meets and fights darth maul, qui-gon and obi-wan both use it/its pronouns for maul. not sure what was going on there

the simplest explanation is the filmmakers want you conceive of maul as not-quite-human, some sort of demonic entity, being as he is an evil space wizard. the funnier answer is that the force gives jedi the ability to perceive people's pronouns and maul has some boydyke shit going on

the dark side of the force is a pathway to many genders some would consider.... unnatural

Obi-Wan's apprenticeship with Qui-Gon is a horse girl movie but they both think the other person is the horse.

ohhh boy i love fanart!!

why is he white

TIME TO THRASH FOR THE HOLIDAY

he does not have a license 

girl obi wan is thriving

Suit of Swords (From Ace to VIII)

Suit of Swords - Completed

i’m pretty sure at this point if someone held me tenderly id just black out

New type of narrator. Not unreliable narrator but narrator whose need for therapy is definitely influencing this story.

leitmotifs never get old to me like holy shit dude there’s this melody that corresponds to this one guy and if you hear the melody it means the guy is there. holy shit. and sometimes it refers to ideas too not just guys. has anyone heard about this

Sometimes something fucked up happens to the guy and their melody gets fucked up too. Sometimes the thing that fucked them up also has its own melody and when the first melody gets fucked up the second melody gets mixed in

no fucking way dude. are you serious

there needs to be a jesus on the cross emoji that i can use any time i have to go to work in an hour

Can’t believe Din Djarin fucked Yoda and made baby Yoda.

I know what I’m doing