THIS. IS. TUMBLR!!!

i still think about "aye moira am oan the protein" way too often

King of Swords

Work it grandma

OK I SAID WORK IT AND SHE REALLY DID

I think you mean, "Work it, GREAT grandma". And she does!

.

good work everyone

Hello Street Cat lore is crazy

shared by homohistoric on instagram

Toothpaste companies must really hate people who are allergic to mint toothpaste, which a lot of people are! Apparently it's NOT supposed to burn like minty hellfire? (I'm fine with mint candy, it's only mint toothpaste that hurts)

I've been using Tom's fennel for years, but am now trying to find one with fluoride in it, and finding a toothpaste that is no mint and yes fluoride should not be such a huge and infuriating quest. still got some more grocery stores to search, but not even the children's toothpaste in the nearest one had any that were suitable.

alright the lyrics I put in the tags on the original post & in a later addition were kinda rough because I couldn't think of replacements for all the religious lines, but it's been rotating in my mind all day so here's a better version of Minty Hellfire:

Advise me, my dentist, you know I'm a hygienic man of my flossing I am justly proud.

I brush every surface, my gums shed not a drop of blood,  no single cheat day ever I've allowed.

Then tell me, my dentist, why it's never good enough,  why the pits of rot still mar my teeth.

I must switch to fluoride? But every option I can find  is full of minty pain beyond belief!

Like fire, Hellfire, this fire sharp and fresh.  To clean my enamel should not inflame my flesh.

It's not my fault! I'm not to blame!  It's Colgate, Sensodyne, and Crest who've set this flame!

It's not my fault, if every brand  has added twenty times more mint than I can stand.

Protect me, oh grocers! Don't let the menthol touch my lips,  don't let its fire sear my mouth and gums.

Provide me with fluoride, but not laced with the fires of Hell,  and I'll keep all my teeth for years to come.

Hellfire, mint fire, is all that I can find.  I may be required to order paste online.

(Thank you again to everyone leaving suggestions in the notes, I have a grand Toothpaste Quest ahead of me! Checked another store today and found no paste, but I did get strawberry kid's mouthwash that says "maximum fluoride", so hopefully probably that won't burn.)

(karaoke track here, vocals mine)

discourse 100% speedrun

happy 420 and day i reserve a spot in hell

its that time again folks

@shubbabang

(Source)

happy 8 years to this post

posts that sum up the potential of humanity

you bottle Miette??

You crush Miette like the grape?

Oh! Barrel for mother!

Barrel for mother for 15 years!

oh fuck this is a really good hill i gotta die on this

rich people seeing mount everest

Yaaaaas 😍

“Son, you best get t’steppin’ if’n y’don’t want this lil doggy.”

*aggressively brandishes gnoll who speaks like a rural Canadian*

i almost scrolled past this like a fool

The gnoll in question:

Man I’d love to see more of these from different cultures.

LMFAO