✨Simon✨

THE ACTUAL AUDIO

chekov’s cat: if you see a cat, it will probably be relevant later.

schroedinger’s gun: there’s no way to know if a gun is loaded or not until you physically inspect and check it yourself, so it’s safest to assume all guns are loaded.

#these are both excellent rules to live by#like#just in general

Murphy’s Theorem: Anything that can become a triangle, will become a triangle.

Pythagoras’s Law: Any attempt to calculate geometry will go wrong.

I feel lied to. This is where the bugs bunny NO meme cokes from

Ah lads they fucking rotated him

NOW it’s you

Oh yea? Well guess what bro

Best post I've seen all day

House of Leaves ass post

Fireflies photograph in trees with long time exposure.

He was right: I do not believe my eyes.

How is bnha anime of the decade...... they aren’t even anime of the hour of the minute of the second

The notes on this post were so toxic that staff just axed em

1969.........

Yes, when the original post is deleted from the server (not just the blog, but the Tumblr servers), there is no root post for notes to be added onto, and also no root post for time to be counted from, so it starts from zero. Most computer operating systems use Unix, which was launched in 1971 with the epoch date of midnight on January 1, 1970 as 1. Therefore zero is one second behind that date: December 31, 1969. Also, very unfortunately, this also means nobody except you and anyone you reblog it to will see this explanation, as you cannot open the notes to see comments when there are no notes.

Wow.... so you’re telling me you took an action that resulted in the death of one person...... to save the lives of many people.... who would have died if you did nothing??? that sounds so familiar

sobbing and crying at the woman who stole a meth addicted kitten from her dealer and then she and the kitten got clean together

thats love baby!!

Not what I expected coming from John Green

this might be my favorite so far

I’ve connected the dots. 

reblog to give the person ur reblogging from an ikea shark

all of us in the notes rn

huh...

well all of us now:

[id in alt text]

…

This is Simon Derailing The Narrative to constantly talk to you about Baz (walking you through the greatest hits of “every time Baz paid special attention to me since we met” “this is how Baz smells” “this is the exact shade of color his eyes are” “these are Baz’s favorite activities, which I know because I have been stalking him for years as I can’t bear to be apart from him/to not be part of his life for several hours”) which starts as early as page 2 in the very first book mind you

everybody look at my cat being scuncht about it