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great writers on the same dreadful typewriter

@bettsfic / bettsfic.tumblr.com

human of rapidly rotating special interests, writer of many fandoms | writing coach, teacher, editor | EIC @oficmag | leader @fanauthorworkshop | newsletter: betts.substack.com | 30s | she/her | i mostly answer asks and reblog gifsets of Paul Newman
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One of the many perils of engaging with Internet Discourse is that sometimes you realize after the fact that the person you were responding to is a literal child who has mistaken their first big feeling about a wildly complex adult topic for an informed opinion, at which point you have to just stare wearily into the middle distance like: ah, yes, this is my cosmic punishment for having once also been fourteen and convinced I knew everything.

#every time i see a Bad Opinion and almost get mad about it#i imagine a student coming into my office and saying it#and in that situation i would go full socratic method#really take time with them and be patient for all the reasons Foz mentioned#but on the other hand i'm also that text post that's like#it's a human rights violation that on the internet i might encounter a 14 year old's opinion at any moment
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ISSUE #11 IS HERE!

We're back from our winter hiatus and so jazzed to be entering our THIRD YEAR of publishing fantastic fucky stories for you. In this issue, we have God and gods, and ghosts who haunt the narrative (sometimes literally and sometimes figuratively). We have ships traversing waters from life to death and ships sinking night after night. Codependent twins with blood magic. A sk8er boi with a gore fetish. And you’ll never look at mangoes the same way again.  

PURCHASE ISSUE #11 HERE.

WAYS TO ENGAGE WITH OFIC:

  • Become a patron (the best way!)
  • Leave us your comments! If a piece spoke to you and you’d like us (and the author) to know, fill out this form.
  • Share your excitement on social media using the hashtag #OFICMag11!
  • Check out our store for cool merch & back stock!

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR YOUR SUPPORT. HAPPY READING AND HAPPY SPRING!

site | subscribe | submit | faq

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featuring work by @jasterwrites @alienfuckeronmain @elleberquist6 @eliotqueliot and others!

also shoutout to our art director Anna for our BEAUTIFUL cover (seriously, it's one of my favorite covers we've ever had) and @emimayooo for her brilliant typesetting and quick-turnaround proofing. and as always, all my love to managing editor @valkyrhys, without whom OFIC would not even exist.

#this is suuuuch a good issue#contribs if i didn't include you in this list it's bc i'm not sure if you want to be tagged#oficmag
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Introducing my Sidestack
Welcome to my unhinged morning pages!
open.substack.com

some of you may have noticed that i haven't posted a newsletter in a million years. there are many reasons for this and they're nearly all good ones, including making a lot of progress on a novel, exercising and eating well, organizing all my worldly possessions, and watching Succession.

aaaand i've been on the fence about something i've finally made a decision about:

after many, many years of hesitation, i've decided to create a paid publication.

this is separate from my main newsletter in part because 1) i may post more frequently, and 2) it's not the kind of content that i think people signed up for in my main newsletter.

you can think of it as

over the years, a lot of people have asked for a way to support my writing and suggested that i get a Patreon. Patreon has never sat right with me though. Substack has many, many problems but after much research, i haven't found a suitable alternative that i'm ready to pull the trigger on. it takes a lot to move platforms, and one day i will, but that day is not today.

Unhinged Morning Pages (or "ump" as i've been calling it, because i love my ridiculous acronyms) is a grand experiment in posting my writing logs, original fiction, and personal essays that don't belong anywhere else.

my main newsletter is a far cry from what it started as, and i have more subscribers than i ever anticipated. the lkwrnl won't change at all; i'll still post monthly-ish craft essays along with news and announcements, and writing advice round-ups when applicable. it will remain free to read.

but now i have a sidestack that you can subscribe to for $7 a month (or $70 a year) where you'll get alllll the other stuff i don't post elsewhere and that i'd like to keep to a smaller audience and behind a paywall. although you can subscribe for free, i don't intend to post free content there.

those who sign up for a paid subscription can read the first chapter of the novel that has taken over my life, Heavy for Hire, about a shitty criminal who kidnaps a girl, lets her go, and then 8 years later becomes her bodyguard.

[WIP] Heavy for Hire, Chapter 1
Fun fact: the original document title was “kidnapper-to-bodyguard pipeline.”
open.substack.com

i posted this to lend some context to my writing log which i'll begin sharing next week, hopefully Monday. (ideally i'd like to post on Mondays. maybe not every Monday but i do have a lot of content to share.)

tomorrow i'll be publishing a regular newsletter (on my lkwrnl) about things i've learned after 5 years as a writing coach. plus OFIC Mag issue #11 drops! april is a very big month and i'm excited to join the world again after months as a hermit.

#ump#lkwrnl#h4h
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Anonymous asked:

Hello. I've been looking through your blog, trying to find advice on how I can improve my writing style as a complete beginner. It always bums me out when I try to write and my stuff is so basic. How do I learn from other authors whose writing feel like magic? What part of writing do I try to focus on first?

i recommend studying rhetorical and literary devices! a good place to start is Elements of Eloquence by Mark Forsyth.

#writing advice#prose
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fresh-avaca-do asked:

HI! You answered about SOTR having a lot of "hanging participles" and "typesetting errors" . Could you give me an example of what those are within the book? English is not my first lenguage and I would like to learn what you're refering to! Thank you so much in advance:)

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one sentence i highlighted with a hanging participle:

Flinging my hammock to its full length, I holler and lunge for the pile.

there's nothing grammatically incorrect about a hanging participle but they generally get polished out with good editing. the reason they don't usually work is because "flinging" is implied to be happening simultaneously with "holler" and "lunge" when what's happening is 1) flinging, and then 2) hollering and lunging. a good rule of thumb when writing for clarity is to keep actions in the order they happen (on a sentence level i mean).

the only time i think it's valid to have a hanging participle is if both actions are happening at the same time. like, "Dying of hunger, I search the fridge for food." but even then, it's just a hand-wavy sentence. a lot of times hanging participles seem like a forced way to vary sentence structure within a paragraph. i would still prefer, "I'm dying of hunger, so I search the fridge for food." or "I'm dying of hunger. I search the fridge for food." a lot of writers think they should avoid the repeated "I" but honestly i think the hanging participle tends to call more attention to itself than a handful of simple sentences.

a typesetting error is a space in a word or a space deleted from a sentence that usually happens when converting a typeset text into an ebook. it's really not a big deal, but you would just expect that for such a huge release, somebody would have proofed the ebook.

#sotr#writing advice#editing
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Anonymous asked:

Have you seen hyunchan's new MV?!!

holy shit this is cool as hell

anon it took me so long to remember that hyunchan is a ship name. i was like, huh, sounds like hyunjin and bang chan. what an interesting coincidence.

buzz cut hyunjin is killing me. he looks so good.

thanks for bringing my attention to it! it's going on my repeat rotation

#stray kids
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Anonymous asked:

Just finished what is maybe my 12th (ish) reread of o-chem after not having thought about it for a year or so which meant I got to be absolutely blown away once again by how good it is. Truly stunning. Thanks so much for sharing

thank you for coming back to it! i really will finish it, i swear

#organic chemistry
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copperarsenite asked:

i am so so so excited to read your wysilee fic! i too adore a ‘pretty pretty princess & bad boy dynamic.’ i’d love to read or watch more fiction that explores it. do you have any recs?

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oh i think i forgot to add to my last ask that i’m interested in ways that trope can be hacked/subverted (which is why wysilee is so compelling to me!). i’ve really enjoyed how you’ve done that in some of your bellarke & hellcheer fic!

unfortunately i only have movie recs because i keep track of the movies i watch but no other media. so if anyone has any recs for tv/books/video games, i'm all ears.

so for me, my favorite subversion is what i call "leather jacket submissives" where the bad boy is only seen that way because of unfortunate circumstances/insecurity/toxic masculinity/what have you and what makes them happiest is having a partner who can call them out on it and strip them of the leather jacket, so to speak. these aren't all bad boy/good girl; some of them are just character explorations. my leather jacket submissives list includes:

  • Grease (the OG) - don't even get me started on this. i have a dissertation's worth of thoughts on Danny/Sandy and how misunderstood they are. "leather jacket submissives" came from Grease because Danny literally sheds his leather and changes into a letterman's jacket instead.
  • The Bikeriders (obvs)
  • My Own Private Idaho (to a literal degree)
  • Drive
  • Baby Driver
  • The Drop
  • On the Waterfront
  • Sweet Bird of Youth
  • Rurouni Kenshin: The Final (live action)
  • Star Wars episodes II and III
  • Tangled (sorry but it's true)

more general sort of subverted bad boy/princess films include:

  • Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (the other OG for me)
  • Anora!!
  • Better Days (a Chinese film that i absolutely love but be sure to watch to the VERY END)
  • The Gray Man (not romantic but the dynamic is there)
  • Leon the Professional (if you watch the Netflix version, not romantic; the unedited version...well, discussions could be had)
  • Knights of the Zodiac (you can read my unhinged review here)

some things that aren't movies that i can think of off the top of my head:

  • Violet Evergarden (anime, subverted in a complicated way)
  • The Secret History (Henry Winter is more byronic than bad boy though)
  • Barry (tv show)

i'm also very into bad girl/good boy but those are much harder to find. always looking for recs with that dynamic.

what i really like about wysilee is that Wyatt is more of a byronic hero than a bad boy, but the fact that he uses his intelligence for illicit gambling i think is what tips him into Danny Zuko territory. he starts off really quiet and stoic, which i initially read as aloof coolness, when in fact he's just a fucken nerd. and Maysilee...i'm just obsessed with her. i really didn't like SotR but i'm thinking about rereading it just for Her.

dear readers, please throw your leather jacket submissive and subverted pretty pretty princess recs at me. i'm dying to collect more.

#leather jacket submissives#candy and bad odds
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zdorik-sandorik asked:

Was the sunrise of the reaping bad as a book itself (oh no, I was looking forward to that!) or did it make you feel bad narratively?

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no spoilers but putting it under a cut anyway

both, kind of? i found it on a line level to be extremely weak writing (SO MANY hanging participles, for one), to the point where i wondered if Suzanne Collins used AI or a ghostwriter. like the prose just doesn't have that wit and rapidity of the trilogy or tbosas. not to mention there are a handful of typesetting errors.

#sotr#negativity tw#but i love the side characters!!#that's my favorite part tbh#it's worth reading for them alone#edit: i'm looking through the fics already written#and a popular tag is#hurt no comfort#which is a great summary of the book
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finished Sunrise on the Reaping (new Hunger Games book). regardless of how i'm feeling about the book itself (bad!), i'm crazy about the Maysilee/Wyatt potential. rich tough-as-nails mean girl and calculator-brain oddsmaker with protective instincts and a heart of gold? i hope to god i'm not the only one who sees this. i'm calling the ship name Wysilee and i have a full-ass AU idea that i don't have time to write but that's going to live in my head forever and ever until i do

#current working title is#candy & bad odds#sorry i'm just never going to not ship the pretty pretty princess and bad boy dynamic#ESPECIALLY when that dynamic is subverted by the princess being a stone cold bitch who always claps back#and the bad boy is a sad shy Byronic hero with latent caretaking instincts and Trauma#and who doesn't really identify as a human because he's always been used as a calculator for his dad's illegal gambling ring#listen i love haymitch but the side characters in this book are fire#sotr#spoilers#sotr spoilers#wysilee#let's make that ship name happen#edit:#oh god this fic is going to require me to do math#goddammit
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Applications now open!

The Spring 2025 Fanauthor Workshop is a 7-week writing course led by Betts (@bettsfic). The workshop lends a supportive space to writers who identify as fans to receive constructive feedback on fanfiction, original fiction, or creative nonfiction.

Art by @emimayooo 💖

Where & When

We meet weekly over Zoom. You can apply for one of two sessions:

What

FAW is a feedback-oriented workshop with the occasional generative session. This means that each week we read 2 pieces submitted by participants, offer written feedback, and discuss them over Zoom. You'll be able to sign up for the week you would like to workshop your own piece, which can be anything under 6k words.

There may be weeks where, in lieu of workshopping, I present external readings and writing exercises. These sessions will be dependent on the number of participants. For example, if we have 10 participants and 6 workshop weeks, that means one week will be devoted to a reading discussion and generative activity.

I developed a workshop model that focuses mostly on affirmations and positivity, as well as descriptive over prescriptive feedback, which is to say, describing one's experience of reading rather than prescribing solutions to perceived problems. We also present improvement-oriented feedback, but avoid negativity, judgment, and pedantry. Week 1 is spent going over the workshop model and how to give feedback.

About FAW

The first FAW was held in 2017 as an independent study in my MFA. I restarted it in 2022 and since then have led 11 sessions with a total of over 55 participants, about half of whom have participated in the workshop more than once.

Participation in the workshop includes entrance into the FAW community, an active Discord server where we host:

  • Ongoing accountability meetings during which we chat over Zoom about our projects and set goals for ourselves every other week
  • A monthly longform writing workshop, where writers can workshop any story between 6k and 100k words
  • A short story club, where we read and discuss original short form works
  • Birthday movie nights! We also have weekly TV show streaming and a few co-op games running
  • Scheduled write-ins and impromptu writing sprints
  • A group quarterly progress tracking sheet that accidentally turned into a micro social media platform
  • And there are always other things going on, like international snack exchanges, craft exchanges, support during the looming deadlines of fic exchanges, and so on

We also chat about writing and craft, offer resources, and share many, many pet photos. Or as emi likes to say, "Pay the pet tax."

In addition, participants of the workshop receive:

  • A one-hour consultation with me to go over your workshop feedback, come up with a plan for revision and/or publication, or anything else you’d like to discuss regarding your writing
  • Open enrollment in future workshops
  • Priority sign-ups for other generative workshops

Eligibility

Anyone over the age of 18 who considers themselves a participant of fandom and who is familiar with fanfiction may apply. A stable internet connection is also required.

Cost

The cost of the workshop is "pay what you can" with the recommended amount of $300. To be as inclusive as possible, I don't want money to be a deterrent for anyone interested in participating.

At least partial payment (or notification of nonpayment) will be requested prior to the start of workshop via PayPal, Venmo, or Wise.

Application requirements

To apply, you will need:

  • An informal cover letter discussing your fan history and goals as a (fan)writer (more specific instructions on submittable)
  • A short sample of your writing, either original work or fanfiction. This may be previously published/posted

You can apply via submittable. Applications close March 9th.

FAQ under the cut

Avatar

I'm keeping apps open two more days!

They'll close on March 11, 2025 at 11:59pm EST.

Here are some testimonials from the fall 2024 session:

I LOVED IT!!!!! I would love to recommend it to others, especially for those who feel alone in their writing. The sense of community here is amazing and so encouraging. I feel like I can tackle any piece if I workshop it with everyone here!

—Emi

Amazing! I would recommend it to others, and I will! Insights I came away with: stop overthinking and write for yourself. I love this workshop so much. I have found so many friends and had so much fun in this workshop.

—Drew

I've been in many many workshops (including in college), and this was by far the best one I've been in! The structure and guidance led to incredibly productive workshops, and the group members were so supportive and exactly the sort of audience I want to have.

—Monterey

Incredible—there's something magical about being surrounded by people who come from different fandom communities who share the same passion for writing. It feels very validating, as a writer who got started in and because of these fandom spaces, to see the way everyone comes together to support one another. It's nice not to prioritize "how do I make this better" and instead focus on "how do I make this clearer" and "how can I better communicate what I'm trying to convey." Both are mindsets I'd never considered and I'm excited to create more with those thoughts in my head. I would absolutely recommend this to writers of any fandom, in any niche, and of any skill level. This experience made me feel like the hours, days, and weeks I've spent holed away writing weren't a waste of time, but a gateway into a larger writing community that I always wish I'd been a part of.

—Shannon

I really enjoyed the workshop and getting to know other writers' personalities and see aspects of that reflected in their work. I think this worked out because of the atmosphere of camaraderie and support that was built with the affirmations at the beginning of each workshop, which helped endear folk to me and make reading their pieces an interesting process, whether or not I was actively interested in the material. I really enjoyed the craft workshop sessions at the beginning, which helped me understand much more about the technical aspects of crafting a story, and it also helped me workshop other people's writing. I continued to learn about craft through listening to people's commentary during each workshop session, and that was an invaluable experience that I am very grateful for, especially as I have limited access to formalised creative writing or english training at the tertiary level.

—Maani

Great! I was really pleased with my feedback. Yes, I would recommend this to others. It was a fun, welcoming space full of people who just wanted to write and talk about fic! Everyone was supportive and helpful.

—Kelsey

Love it as always!

—Ham (who has taken the workshop 4 times)

I had a great experience in the workshop! It was an awesome experience working with writers who have a real respect and appreciation for fic. I enjoyed reading everyone's pieces and giving feedback. The individual consultation with Beth was also super helpful and encouraging—even just talking about writing in general since I didn't need to talk too much more about my workshop piece. I would recommend this workshop not only for the experience itself but also because the FAW writing community is active and vibrant and it is a great community to be a part of.

—Caroline

If you have any questions at all about the workshop or the FAW community, please feel free to send an ask!

Avatar

Only one day left to apply!

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Last day to apply!!

Applications close at 11:59pm ET tonight

#faw sp25
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Anonymous asked:

Currently thinking about working on a project that would require a good amount of research to feel real (the research is for a certain time period). I’m afraid to get too caught up in the researching phase so I plan to learn the basics and do more research during revisions. However, I’m scared that this may be too much of a challenge for a first attempt at a novel. Is starting a project that needs a decent amount of research too much for a new novelist?

what i've found with research is that the project i *think* it's going to go into is never the project it actually ends up going into. the key to research, especially broad topics, is to keep it to subjects you're intrinsically interested in. especially for a new novelist, i think you can consider it the other way around: there's a topic you want to research and that information may end up in a story idea you have. for example, if you have a character who's an astronomer and you've always wanted to learn about space, collecting information for your character is a great lens through which research. you're not just researching space, but specifically the niche of your character. and when you view something through the perspective of a character, that's allllll stuff you'll remember, because it's anchored to something else. researching for a project is one of the best ways to retain large amounts of information.

it may seem like a waste of time if you never end up using the information you research, but 1) you will use it eventually because the research you do for project A will inevitably inspire project B, 2) research builds an important framework for even more research, and 3) learning something is never wasted time. there's no greater pursuit than learning stuff.

if you want to learn more about research for writing, i wrote a newsletter about it!

#writing advice#prewriting#research
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Reblogged
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Applications now open!

The Spring 2025 Fanauthor Workshop is a 7-week writing course led by Betts (@bettsfic). The workshop lends a supportive space to writers who identify as fans to receive constructive feedback on fanfiction, original fiction, or creative nonfiction.

Art by @emimayooo 💖

Where & When

We meet weekly over Zoom. You can apply for one of two sessions:

What

FAW is a feedback-oriented workshop with the occasional generative session. This means that each week we read 2 pieces submitted by participants, offer written feedback, and discuss them over Zoom. You'll be able to sign up for the week you would like to workshop your own piece, which can be anything under 6k words.

There may be weeks where, in lieu of workshopping, I present external readings and writing exercises. These sessions will be dependent on the number of participants. For example, if we have 10 participants and 6 workshop weeks, that means one week will be devoted to a reading discussion and generative activity.

I developed a workshop model that focuses mostly on affirmations and positivity, as well as descriptive over prescriptive feedback, which is to say, describing one's experience of reading rather than prescribing solutions to perceived problems. We also present improvement-oriented feedback, but avoid negativity, judgment, and pedantry. Week 1 is spent going over the workshop model and how to give feedback.

About FAW

The first FAW was held in 2017 as an independent study in my MFA. I restarted it in 2022 and since then have led 11 sessions with a total of over 55 participants, about half of whom have participated in the workshop more than once.

Participation in the workshop includes entrance into the FAW community, an active Discord server where we host:

  • Ongoing accountability meetings during which we chat over Zoom about our projects and set goals for ourselves every other week
  • A monthly longform writing workshop, where writers can workshop any story between 6k and 100k words
  • A short story club, where we read and discuss original short form works
  • Birthday movie nights! We also have weekly TV show streaming and a few co-op games running
  • Scheduled write-ins and impromptu writing sprints
  • A group quarterly progress tracking sheet that accidentally turned into a micro social media platform
  • And there are always other things going on, like international snack exchanges, craft exchanges, support during the looming deadlines of fic exchanges, and so on

We also chat about writing and craft, offer resources, and share many, many pet photos. Or as emi likes to say, "Pay the pet tax."

In addition, participants of the workshop receive:

  • A one-hour consultation with me to go over your workshop feedback, come up with a plan for revision and/or publication, or anything else you’d like to discuss regarding your writing
  • Open enrollment in future workshops
  • Priority sign-ups for other generative workshops

Eligibility

Anyone over the age of 18 who considers themselves a participant of fandom and who is familiar with fanfiction may apply. A stable internet connection is also required.

Cost

The cost of the workshop is "pay what you can" with the recommended amount of $300. To be as inclusive as possible, I don't want money to be a deterrent for anyone interested in participating.

At least partial payment (or notification of nonpayment) will be requested prior to the start of workshop via PayPal, Venmo, or Wise.

Application requirements

To apply, you will need:

  • An informal cover letter discussing your fan history and goals as a (fan)writer (more specific instructions on submittable)
  • A short sample of your writing, either original work or fanfiction. This may be previously published/posted

You can apply via submittable. Applications close March 9th.

FAQ under the cut

Avatar

I'm keeping apps open two more days!

They'll close on March 11, 2025 at 11:59pm EST.

Here are some testimonials from the fall 2024 session:

I LOVED IT!!!!! I would love to recommend it to others, especially for those who feel alone in their writing. The sense of community here is amazing and so encouraging. I feel like I can tackle any piece if I workshop it with everyone here!

—Emi

Amazing! I would recommend it to others, and I will! Insights I came away with: stop overthinking and write for yourself. I love this workshop so much. I have found so many friends and had so much fun in this workshop.

—Drew

I've been in many many workshops (including in college), and this was by far the best one I've been in! The structure and guidance led to incredibly productive workshops, and the group members were so supportive and exactly the sort of audience I want to have.

—Monterey

Incredible—there's something magical about being surrounded by people who come from different fandom communities who share the same passion for writing. It feels very validating, as a writer who got started in and because of these fandom spaces, to see the way everyone comes together to support one another. It's nice not to prioritize "how do I make this better" and instead focus on "how do I make this clearer" and "how can I better communicate what I'm trying to convey." Both are mindsets I'd never considered and I'm excited to create more with those thoughts in my head. I would absolutely recommend this to writers of any fandom, in any niche, and of any skill level. This experience made me feel like the hours, days, and weeks I've spent holed away writing weren't a waste of time, but a gateway into a larger writing community that I always wish I'd been a part of.

—Shannon

I really enjoyed the workshop and getting to know other writers' personalities and see aspects of that reflected in their work. I think this worked out because of the atmosphere of camaraderie and support that was built with the affirmations at the beginning of each workshop, which helped endear folk to me and make reading their pieces an interesting process, whether or not I was actively interested in the material. I really enjoyed the craft workshop sessions at the beginning, which helped me understand much more about the technical aspects of crafting a story, and it also helped me workshop other people's writing. I continued to learn about craft through listening to people's commentary during each workshop session, and that was an invaluable experience that I am very grateful for, especially as I have limited access to formalised creative writing or english training at the tertiary level.

—Maani

Great! I was really pleased with my feedback. Yes, I would recommend this to others. It was a fun, welcoming space full of people who just wanted to write and talk about fic! Everyone was supportive and helpful.

—Kelsey

Love it as always!

—Ham (who has taken the workshop 4 times)

I had a great experience in the workshop! It was an awesome experience working with writers who have a real respect and appreciation for fic. I enjoyed reading everyone's pieces and giving feedback. The individual consultation with Beth was also super helpful and encouraging—even just talking about writing in general since I didn't need to talk too much more about my workshop piece. I would recommend this workshop not only for the experience itself but also because the FAW writing community is active and vibrant and it is a great community to be a part of.

—Caroline

If you have any questions at all about the workshop or the FAW community, please feel free to send an ask!

Avatar

Only one day left to apply!

#signal boost
Avatar
Anonymous asked:

Betts! I love quick witted remarks and comebacks when it comes to dialogue (for example, in Succession) so i wanted to ask you, do you have any advice for writing dialogue with a rhythm?

have i mentioned that i'm watching succession right now? i just finished season 3 and i'm recovering a bit before starting 4.

but to answer your question, nearly all comedy (in this case, wit) comes from the setup-punchline pattern.

for example:

“He’s selling me things I want at a fair price? So what’s next, fellatio?”

here, logan sets up the joke in the first sentence and provides the punchline in the second. in this case, what makes it funny is the raunchy hyperbole paired with the mundanity of "fair price."

“What the fuck is this obsession with milk? You know who drinks milk? Kittens and perverts.”

here, roman is pairing "kittens" unexpectedly with "perverts" in conjunction with something as dull as drinking milk.

“You don’t hear much about syphilis these days. Very much the MySpace of STDs.”

same as above, but providing the comparison of the social context of MySpace as a formerly ubiquitous social media site with the formerly ubiquitous syphilis.

“The ‘Logan Roy School of Journalism’? What’s next, the ‘Jack The Ripper Women’s Health Clinic’?”

and

“He ate my fucking chicken. What’s next? Stick his cock in my potato salad?”

when you start to break down the funniest lines, you see the patterns in them. these two have the same setup as the fellatio line above. so any time you find a line particularly funny, it's worth it to write it down and break it up into setup and punchline. take out the setup and punchline, and you're left with a formula:

[statement based on previous dialogue or moment]. what's next, [something you wouldn't expect to follow]?

as you're writing, every time you come across an opportunity for a setup, you can land a punchline by using some of the formulas you've found. if the setup is highbrow, go lowbrow. if the setup is normal, go absurd. if the setup is mundane, go hyperbolic.

i know explaining comedy sometimes ruins what's funny, but hopefully this helps in crafting your own banter!

#writing advice#comedy#dialogue#succession
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Reblogged
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Applications now open!

The Spring 2025 Fanauthor Workshop is a 7-week writing course led by Betts (@bettsfic). The workshop lends a supportive space to writers who identify as fans to receive constructive feedback on fanfiction, original fiction, or creative nonfiction.

Art by @emimayooo 💖

Where & When

We meet weekly over Zoom. You can apply for one of two sessions:

What

FAW is a feedback-oriented workshop with the occasional generative session. This means that each week we read 2 pieces submitted by participants, offer written feedback, and discuss them over Zoom. You'll be able to sign up for the week you would like to workshop your own piece, which can be anything under 6k words.

There may be weeks where, in lieu of workshopping, I present external readings and writing exercises. These sessions will be dependent on the number of participants. For example, if we have 10 participants and 6 workshop weeks, that means one week will be devoted to a reading discussion and generative activity.

I developed a workshop model that focuses mostly on affirmations and positivity, as well as descriptive over prescriptive feedback, which is to say, describing one's experience of reading rather than prescribing solutions to perceived problems. We also present improvement-oriented feedback, but avoid negativity, judgment, and pedantry. Week 1 is spent going over the workshop model and how to give feedback.

About FAW

The first FAW was held in 2017 as an independent study in my MFA. I restarted it in 2022 and since then have led 11 sessions with a total of over 55 participants, about half of whom have participated in the workshop more than once.

Participation in the workshop includes entrance into the FAW community, an active Discord server where we host:

  • Ongoing accountability meetings during which we chat over Zoom about our projects and set goals for ourselves every other week
  • A monthly longform writing workshop, where writers can workshop any story between 6k and 100k words
  • A short story club, where we read and discuss original short form works
  • Birthday movie nights! We also have weekly TV show streaming and a few co-op games running
  • Scheduled write-ins and impromptu writing sprints
  • A group quarterly progress tracking sheet that accidentally turned into a micro social media platform
  • And there are always other things going on, like international snack exchanges, craft exchanges, support during the looming deadlines of fic exchanges, and so on

We also chat about writing and craft, offer resources, and share many, many pet photos. Or as emi likes to say, "Pay the pet tax."

In addition, participants of the workshop receive:

  • A one-hour consultation with me to go over your workshop feedback, come up with a plan for revision and/or publication, or anything else you’d like to discuss regarding your writing
  • Open enrollment in future workshops
  • Priority sign-ups for other generative workshops

Eligibility

Anyone over the age of 18 who considers themselves a participant of fandom and who is familiar with fanfiction may apply. A stable internet connection is also required.

Cost

The cost of the workshop is "pay what you can" with the recommended amount of $300. To be as inclusive as possible, I don't want money to be a deterrent for anyone interested in participating.

At least partial payment (or notification of nonpayment) will be requested prior to the start of workshop via PayPal, Venmo, or Wise.

Application requirements

To apply, you will need:

  • An informal cover letter discussing your fan history and goals as a (fan)writer (more specific instructions on submittable)
  • A short sample of your writing, either original work or fanfiction. This may be previously published/posted

You can apply via submittable. Applications close March 9th.

FAQ under the cut

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I'm keeping apps open two more days!

They'll close on March 11, 2025 at 11:59pm EST.

Here are some testimonials from the fall 2024 session:

I LOVED IT!!!!! I would love to recommend it to others, especially for those who feel alone in their writing. The sense of community here is amazing and so encouraging. I feel like I can tackle any piece if I workshop it with everyone here!

—Emi

Amazing! I would recommend it to others, and I will! Insights I came away with: stop overthinking and write for yourself. I love this workshop so much. I have found so many friends and had so much fun in this workshop.

—Drew

I've been in many many workshops (including in college), and this was by far the best one I've been in! The structure and guidance led to incredibly productive workshops, and the group members were so supportive and exactly the sort of audience I want to have.

—Monterey

Incredible—there's something magical about being surrounded by people who come from different fandom communities who share the same passion for writing. It feels very validating, as a writer who got started in and because of these fandom spaces, to see the way everyone comes together to support one another. It's nice not to prioritize "how do I make this better" and instead focus on "how do I make this clearer" and "how can I better communicate what I'm trying to convey." Both are mindsets I'd never considered and I'm excited to create more with those thoughts in my head. I would absolutely recommend this to writers of any fandom, in any niche, and of any skill level. This experience made me feel like the hours, days, and weeks I've spent holed away writing weren't a waste of time, but a gateway into a larger writing community that I always wish I'd been a part of.

—Shannon

I really enjoyed the workshop and getting to know other writers' personalities and see aspects of that reflected in their work. I think this worked out because of the atmosphere of camaraderie and support that was built with the affirmations at the beginning of each workshop, which helped endear folk to me and make reading their pieces an interesting process, whether or not I was actively interested in the material. I really enjoyed the craft workshop sessions at the beginning, which helped me understand much more about the technical aspects of crafting a story, and it also helped me workshop other people's writing. I continued to learn about craft through listening to people's commentary during each workshop session, and that was an invaluable experience that I am very grateful for, especially as I have limited access to formalised creative writing or english training at the tertiary level.

—Maani

Great! I was really pleased with my feedback. Yes, I would recommend this to others. It was a fun, welcoming space full of people who just wanted to write and talk about fic! Everyone was supportive and helpful.

—Kelsey

Love it as always!

—Ham (who has taken the workshop 4 times)

I had a great experience in the workshop! It was an awesome experience working with writers who have a real respect and appreciation for fic. I enjoyed reading everyone's pieces and giving feedback. The individual consultation with Beth was also super helpful and encouraging—even just talking about writing in general since I didn't need to talk too much more about my workshop piece. I would recommend this workshop not only for the experience itself but also because the FAW writing community is active and vibrant and it is a great community to be a part of.

—Caroline

If you have any questions at all about the workshop or the FAW community, please feel free to send an ask!

#testimonials#faw sp25#signal boost
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things i've learned about cooking after finally getting the hang of it after 20 years of trying and also finally organizing my kitchen:

note that i mostly cook for myself so a lot of this won't apply to people who have to cook for their whole family

  1. invest in good storage solutions. buy the pop top pasta holder, the fancy glass tupperware, the very pretty candy jar. if you like looking at it and it's something you'll use for years, maybe the rest of your life, it is worth the money
  2. that said, depending on your budget, making a list of all of said storage solutions (and utensils, tools, appliances, etc.) and buying one a month is a good way to spread it out. again, if it lasts a lifetime and you'll use it, it's worth it
  3. cook food you love. this is such a simple thing and for some people probably obvious, but as someone who is not at all a picky eater, for years i found myself only cooking things that were tasty but not to *my* tastes, just because the fancy recipe i found told me it was good
  4. another note about cooking to your own tastes: if you're just starting out cooking for yourself, don't bother thinking about what's healthy. focus on making meals that you want to shovel into your face. healthy can happen once cooking gets easier. the idea is that you're learning to love food you make *more* than food that can be delivered
  5. THINK SMALL. i, a midwesterner, seem to be genetically predisposed to buying the most giant of all things, because you can use big stuff for small things but not the other way around. for example, if you're only cooking for yourself or one other person, you can buy one of those little half baking sheets instead of a full one. a leeettle skillet for your one grilled cheese instead of hauling out the one that can fit four. the bigger one is heavy and annoying to clean, and even though that might not seem like a big deal, when you're weighing your options, these kinds of hurdles start to add up. again, if it will encourage you to cook, it is worth investing in
  6. speaking of hurdles, make everything as easy as possible. i am a perfectionist. i like doing things the Right Way. so when a chef says, "don't use cooking wine, use real wine" when i don't buy alcohol, and "the key to good asparagus is only buying it in season" when i don't even know what that season is or where to buy asparagus locally, it just means i won't try that recipe even if i was excited to, because i've been taught (get ready for it) it's not worth doing unless you do it right. but fuck that. you're not aiming for the best, you're aiming for food you're excited to eat
  7. when i say "as easy as possible" i mean so easy may that it might even become fun. buy jarred garlic, an electric can opener, pre-cut vegetables. pots and pans you think are cute. mats for your feet. the prettiest apron you've ever seen. take note of anything that pings your brain as "hard" even if your natural inclination is to dismiss it because *other* people don't find it hard. write it down. figure out a way to make it easier or better
  8. cooking is an inherently sensory experience. if you have sensory issues, your goal is to accommodate yourself to the highest possible degree. if you avoid washing your hands because you hate the smell of your soap, throw it out (or give it away) and go on a journey to find soap that's more pleasing to you
  9. if you research cooking, especially on youtube, you'll find a lot of youtubers who try to encourage you to make excess so you can freeze it, meal prep so you don't have to worry about cooking throughout the week, etc. these are great tips but again: none of that stuff is worth thinking about until cooking becomes easier. just think about one meal at a time
  10. if you hate leftovers, make sure you're only cooking single-serving easy meals or slightly more difficult double-serving meals. don't bother with 4 servings of something you might hate. for the next-day serving, it'll probably taste better if you heat it up in the microwave on 70% or 50% power. this has saved like a hundred otherwise disgusting meals for me
  11. i know those weekly meal box subscriptions are basically a scam and crazy expensive, but i bought 1-2 a month for a year with the same service and i started to understand the techniques they used above and beyond the recipes they were providing. it's really eye-opening to realize one of your favorite meals is really only 6 ingredients and you know *how* to put them together without reading any instructions
  12. honestly the meal box was not more expensive for me than my food budget. everyone says buying grocery food is way cheaper, but if you're buying 2lbs of rice just to cook 2 cups and then you're never going to cook rice anymore, that's still the cost of that whole bag of rice. with a meal box, they only give you exactly what you need for the recipe. combined with going out to eat and getting delivery, 2 boxes a month ended up being about the same price
  13. if you're the kind of person who needs to understand the theory behind basically everything in order to anchor the skills it requires, i highly recommend the book Ruhlman's Twenty. it goes through the science of cooking like heating food and why salt makes things taste good
  14. once you get into a groove and you have a good idea of your favorite ingredients, pick 40 to always have on hand so that you're not buying for individual recipes and you can also organize your kitchen more easily. with 40 base ingredients you know that unless there's a special occasion, you'll basically only have these items to find a place for
  15. if you work from home, break dinner into prep time and cook time. if you prep dinner when you go eat lunch, it's very hard to say "i just don't feel like cooking" when it comes to dinner time, because 1) all your food is out and ready to go, and 2) you're already done with half the work
  16. progress and improvement may be slow. be patient with yourself. cooking is a life-long commitment and so you're not in any rush. be honest to yourself about both your ambitions and limitations, and set up your kitchen and shopping list to suit your needs
  17. food is necessary to live. if you have to choose only one aspect of your life to focus on improving, i recommend cooking. even though we live in a convenience economy and can get basically anything delivered, i find i'm so much happier now. i have more energy. i sleep better. cooking food you love is one of the best gifts you can give yourself
#food#food tw#cooking#advice
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Anonymous asked:

absolutely sobbing with joy that you're writing an Anora fic!!! if there's anyone I trust to get their vibe *chef's kiss* it's you! I desperately need more of them in all possible ways

all i want in this whole world is to pound out this fic but i am so busy 😭 on the plus side though the longer i sit on the idea the longer it will probably become

it doesn't even have a plot yet. it's just Ani losing her shit while Igor goes 😍

i realize that's also the plot of the movie but this is different. it's post-canon

#anora
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