Breekon & Hope are the best delivery service because:

- Always on time.

- No shipping fees.

- Package arrives exactly where it needs to be.

Breekon & Hope are the worst delivery service because:

- You did NOT order this.

- The package is cursed.

- Refusing delivery is NOT an option.

Prior to the revelation around the aliens receiving his logs, Eiffel's logical expectation is that the only people who'll listen to his logs are people at Goddard Command. And yet the way he speaks in those logs is often not really addressed at Goddard staff. For example, in Ep8 The Empty Man Cometh, he says:

The first part of that quote is obviously directed at Goddard staff, at the people who create many of the situations Eiffel and the rest of the Hephaestus crew have to deal with (such as the empty man panic). But the second part - the part addressed to Eiffel's "dear listeners" - feels like a switch, like it's directed at a sympathetic audience who are witnessing Eiffel's plight without having any role in it. In other words, it feels like it's directed at us. Before the aliens come into the picture, we are the "dear listeners".

There's no logical reason for Eiffel to make this kind of switch between the listener he blames (i.e. Goddard Command) and his more sympathetic "dear listener". He's mentally constructing a listener to his logs who is on his side, when he has no in-universe reason to believe that there is one. It's an interesting kind of coping mechanism - potentially linked to the unconscious, perhaps misdirected, desire for connection that led him to transmit his logs into deep space.

There are other signs that the "dear listener" Eiffel directs his logs towards has very little to do with Goddard, such as the way he explains things that Goddard staff would obviously know (which is obviously useful from a storytelling perspective, but also feels in-character and in line with his other behaviour), as well as telling the listener things that could land him in trouble with Goddard.

Eiffel is the kind of genre-savvy character who is regularly on the brink of fully breaking the fourth wall. He doesn't know he's in an audio drama, but he's so prone to narrating his life that he might as well know. He's always constructing the narrative of his life in his head, so perhaps he finds that it helps to imagine someone on Earth who is listening sympathetically to the story he's telling himself. In his world, at the beginning of the show, he doesn't have that listener, or doesn't believe he has. But his words reach across from the universe of his story into ours. And his voice finds the kind of dear listener he was imagining without hoping for - someone who has no role in anything that happens on the Hephaestus but who is willing to listen to his story. In pressing play on your podcast app, you become the listener he was longing for.

[ID: A three panel comic featuring Jon and Martin from TMA wading through a swamp. A gnarled hand and distorted face float in the swamp. In the first panel, Martin looks at a bloody oar in the water and says "hey, there's a bloody oar in the water!". In the second panel, Martin holds the oar, and Jon has turned to face him. Jon looks tense and says "That's foreboding..." The edges of this panel are shaded darker to indicate Jon Beholding. In the third panel, Martin has his arms crossed angrily. He says "I know what they're for!" The darkness from the previous panel is gone, and Jon looks surprised and confused. End ID]

I've seen this tweet by Browtweaten on Twitter and it always makes me think of. Them

Character who doesn't get to die & character who doesn't get to live. Is that anything.

I think one of the fundamental horror elements of jon and martin's relationship (that is super underutilized in fanworks imo) is that when they say "where you go, I go," they really mean it. by the time they're striding across that hellscape, and tbh even earlier than that, there is no duplicity or slight or monstrous act either of them could do that the other wouldn't forgive so they could stay together. personal insults, lashing out, working with the enemy, attacking strangers, direct violence, deliberately endangering each other, murder, encouraging murder, total and complete betrayals of trust, they've done it all and reconciled afterwards. sometimes they talk it out and resolve it in a reasonable way, and sometimes they're just like "hmm. fucked up!" or ("hmm. kinda cute when he does it <3") and never mention it again.

it's not just about letting anything slide with each other, either, it's bigger than that. martin will make the decision on a personal level that he could never live with surviving off of innocent people's suffering, but if doing that on a cosmic scale is the way to keep jon with him then he will sacrifice all his principles and do it. jon is hell bent on quarantining the fears by literally murdering the planet as quickly and efficiently as possible, but the second this means martin potentially dying in front of him he changes his mind. when jon says that their love for each other is "the real core of it," he's not just declaring affection after a fight, he is stating the cause for the incomprehensible tragedy that they're about to enact. it's less "the love was there, it didn't change anything" and more "the love was there, it doomed us all." it isn't even a question, they will wrap their soulmate-red binding string around the necks of everyone in the entire cosmos before they sever it.

The Magnus Archives X Marble Hornets crossover

I love *squints at smudged handwriting on wrist* Magnus Hornets. Marble Archives

Story where everyone is gay and also a kinda shitty person

happy aromantic spectrum awareness week thank you carpenter the silt verses for inventing aromanticism

i find it so interesting that gerry is always depicted as goth when textually he’s a metalhead? death metal is blaring from his room in the first episode he’s introduced, he’s wearing a Mastodon tshirt in the fear corridors episode… the only time he’s called goth is by jurgen leitner and he doesn’t strike me as someone who’s well-versed in identifying alternative subcultures by fashion

awake... but at what cost...?

or,

for @mileaftermile <3

how dare you be funnier than me on my own dang post >:c @midniightmoon (/lh /j akshdhue it's too good)

Sexiest Podcast Character 2024 — Scripted Undefeated Bracket — Round 2

Propaganda

Michael Walters (WOE.BEGONE):

Antigone Funn (Wooden Overcoats):

Art of Michael Walters courtesy of @dracolichen.

Additional propaganda below the cut:

i think minkowski from wolf 359 should have been captain of a doomed whaling vessel in the 1820s. i think she would have been very good at that

guys ill be real i dont think jon would wear any sort of pride related badges or pins or whatever else signaling his identity. this is a man to whom revealing his favourite colour is a harrowing experience. martin picks up on his favourite tea flavour and jon remains mortified for three weeks straight. he checks the mirror compulsively to make sure no hint at his personality got through to his appearance. jarchivist sims isn't out here telling the world he's bi and ace. the world has no need for that kind of information. its not like hes getting any so whats the point

"Being aroace means you have so much more time to develop your skills" factoid actually just statistical error. Rosalind Ursula, who works for Wheyface Industries and demonstrates over 10,000 skills per day, is an outlier and should not have been counted.

What can't Rosalind do? This is not rhetorical, Wheyface Industries is trying to crack this so we can finally definitively know Where Man Is Not Meant To Tread.