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Konkey Dong

@kimpossibooty / kimpossibooty.tumblr.com

KICK ASS GO TO SPACE REPRESENT THE HUMAN RACE Tom / 28 / He/Him Court-Appointed Jester

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I proudly save every picture I see of a cool wizard casting a spell

as someone who has their own wizard picture collection. Would you like to share with the class

So just a few treasures include

And my personal favorite is of course:

Which I never risk being without so I do keep laminated copies in my (kinda nasty) phone case

And behind my license in my wallet, in case I ever need to smooth talk a cop out of a ticket

one time I got hate crimed because of how nice my ass looked and it’s a very funny story to tell until I sit back and remember how in danger I was and I get a haunted look in my eye and stare off into the middle distance as my friends laugh at my killer delivery

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i get so unreasonably annoyed when people are lip syncing to a sound and are just like. completely wrong and fucking it up. like what do you mean you spent six hours doing make up and a further fifteen+ designing and making a custom cosplay but when it came down do it you didn't practice your line delivery like two... three more times? girl. like... girl

things you can say at a parade and in bed: wow! jfk! your head!

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lorena bopit be like: bop it! twist it! pull it! chop it! flee the scene with it! defenestrate it!

usually i appreciate when my wife adds to my posts but

Btw happy April of the Penguins to all who celebrate

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lorena bopit be like: bop it! twist it! pull it! chop it! flee the scene with it! defenestrate it!

usually i appreciate when my wife adds to my posts but

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