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Spiderwoman

@spideypooler03 / spideypooler03.tumblr.com

My nickname is nightwolf.
I am 21 years old.
I use she/her pronounces and I am pansexual.
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Ghostbusters x ghost reader

Warnings: mentions of death, obsessive behaviour, non canon events, descriptions of traps being painful, ghost stuff

  • You had no idea what happened
  • One minute you were alive, and the next you were dead
  • But it wasn’t the death you were promised
  • You were given your body, but your skin was translucent and you felt utterly weightless
  • You were hysterical as you tried to ask the people surrounding you what was happening, but they ignored your presence and you quickly figured out they couldn’t see you or notice your presence
  • You had no clue how long you’d been dead, or how long you had roamed the streets in your Vaporised body
  • But you were so tragically bored
  • who knew that being a ghost was so mind numbingly mundane
  • You spent most of your days in your previous apartment with the tv on as you tried to live your life as if you were just having a day off from work, and not like you were dead and cursed to roam the world
  • But that only worked until the landlord cleared out your apartment so you just sat on the floor in the empty carcass that was once your home
  • And then some newlyweds moved in, and they were gross
  • You had to deal with seeing their acts of love and pda and have the realisation that that kind of love was no longer in the cards for you
  • So one day you got annoyed with their very loud PDA in the bedroom, and out of frustration you slammed cupboard and startled the life out of the couple
  • And a mischievous smirk crossed your face at the realisation that you could royally fuck someone’s day up with this
  • So you started off with hiding stuff, then breaking stuff until you finally got so frustrated that you screamed and accidentally revealed yourself to the couple
  • They called the ghostbusters the next day to report being haunted by the ghost of an early twenties female who was extremely mischievous
  • Winston and Ray were the first to arrive at the scene and immediately as they entered the apartment they felt a chill in their bones
  • You wanted to mess with them but you thought better of it as you had seen one of their adverts back before you died, you knew what they were here for and you were not about to get caught in one of those traps
  • So you just followed them into each of the rooms they visited and watched from over their shoulders
  • They had been to each of the rooms and retreated back to the living room when Peter and Egon arrived
  • Egon did various tests that you were careful to avoid in an attempt to fool them into thinking that you were not there
  • You hadn’t avoided the tests completely though, as Egon’s device showed that there was a ghostly presence but your attempts of fooling them had paid off because avoiding the device like you had gave the impression that the spiritual presence wasn’t in that apartment but someone else’s
  • The newlyweds were extremely frustrated with that outcome and demanded explanations for the various spiritual incidents like the coldness
  • To which venkman replied that they should check on their AC before stating that they were extremely busy and unless the spirit came back, the ghost busters couldn’t help
  • As they went to leave, you did something you weren’t sure was possible
  • You attached yourself to Egon as he left your apartment building, having taken you with him accidentally
  • And Egon accidentally took you straight to the ghostbusters headquarters
  • Where after you got adjusted, you wrecked havoc
  • You started off small by following the workers of ghostbusters around their daily routine in the headquarters
  • You followed Egon round in his lab, you followed Winston as he stored traps, you followed Peter around as he annoyed people in his office and you followed Ray around as he helped improve traps and washed the car
  • You also listened to Janine on the phone and whenever Dana would come in to visit Venkman you would follow her around as she helped keep the place in order
  • But that quickly got boring the routines became predictable, so you decided to throw a few wrenches in their plans
  • You’d mess with Egons lab equipment so that his results wouldn’t come out clearly
  • You’d move traps around whenever Winston went to clean them or store them until he found them in the strangest and impossible to reach sports
  • You’d mess with Peters papers whenever he left his office and your delete messages that someone left for him just out of spite
  • And you’d mess up any progress Ray made with the traps and you’d mess up anything he cleaned
  • It all become quite frustrating for the four men
  • You weren’t a violent or impulsive spirit like they had experience before, you were just mischievous and annoying
  • It all came to a head one night when you decided to get bold with your mischief
  • You had assumed that all of the ghostbusters were out for the night, but you failed to recall the recluse that was Egon Spengler
  • You had gotten bored so you decided to go to the radio that Janine kept on her desk and you blasted the radio as it played maneater by Daryl & Oats
  • You danced around in a similar fashion to Lydia from beetle juice as you raised yourself to the ceiling and danced around the room
  • The music had disturbed Egon as he rushed out of the lab and into the main area, where he saw you dancing
  • In your joy you had become visible to the human eye, and Egon could see the little minx who had been tormenting him and his friends for months on end
  • Egon watched for around ten minutes before you spotted him and disappearing, but not before flashing him a fox like smile
  • Now that Egon was aware of your existence, he decided it was time he looked into who you were
  • He pestered your landlord about the previous residents of your apartment and looked through the photos until he recognised you
  • Your landlord assumed Egon must have been an old boyfriend and insisted that he take some of your stuff since you had no family come and collect it, and Egon accepted out of peer pressure
  • So he brought your things back to the headquarters and looked through them
  • He found many things of interest to him but he noticed a dusty chess board in one of the various boxes and thought it would be a brilliant way to to establish communication
  • So he dusted off the chess board and set it up in his lab with a camera set up in the corner, and he waited
  • He made his first move and waited around five minutes before a piece from the opposite side moved in a countermove
  • Egon played chess with you until he eventually won, and he offered you a rematch on the condition that you communicated with him this time
  • And so you did, you made yourself visible to Egon and you were sporting the same fox like grin as before
  • Egon tried to ask questions during your second game, but you never answered past shaking and nodding your head
  • You had won the second round after making a few unexpected moves while Egon was distracted trying to communicate with you
  • Egon gathered the ghostbusters and showed them the tape before actively encouraging them to try and communicate with you whenever they noticed your mischievous presence
  • They all questioned why they shouldn’t just trap you and store you, but Egon quickly responded that he’d never seen a spirit with this amount of self awareness that you were a ghost, and the fact that you communicated with him was an intriguing premise as most spirits don’t communicate in favour of doing whatever they did before they died
  • It became somewhat of a daily occurrence for you to play chess with Egon as he encouraged you to talk and you refused
  • Winston was the most receptive to Egons as his frustration at your mischievous antics encouraged him to scold what looked like thin air about how hard you made his day, he may have felt foolish talking to himself but he’d do anything to try and convince you to stop hiding his traps
  • So he talked to an empty room as he stored a trap and almost stopped before hearing a ghostly giggle
  • He had turned around and saw your translucent figure actively laughing at his frustration before taking off with his trap
  • He practically played hide and seek with you for about an hour before he saw you leave the trap in the lab and take off with a fox like grin
  • That became a daily occurrence for Winston, and despite his annoyance he quite enjoyed your little games
  • Raymond was the next person to become more receptive to your presence as he tried to seek you out
  • He had noted what Egon had said about catching you dancing and that gave Ray an idea as he rewashed the car you dirtied again
  • He turned on the radio to his usual station of self proclaimed “groove music’ and talked to the room as he tried to encourage you to come out and listen to the music
  • And he was caught of guard when the radio completely turned off and for a moment he thought he had angered you
  • That was until the radio started again with a more pop like radio, and ray figured out that you weren’t angry but you hated his music
  • Ray tried to defend his music taste to your invisible presence and switch back the radio to his music but he got spooked as you came out of no where and did a quick ‘boo’
  • When he was distracted by the near heart attack you gave him, you switched it back to your music
  • Ray decided it was easier to give in rather than be spooked every time he went near the radio
  • After that, whenever ray was working on something he’d turn on the radio and you’d switch the music and you’d both listen together
  • And you’d still give him small spooks whenever you could
  • You bonded with Venkman months after the others and over something extremely surprising, crossword puzzles
  • Peter loved and hated crossword puzzles
  • He loved the feeling of completing one and the feeling of superiority that came from it, he hated that he could never actually finish them
  • So one day after your usual wreaking of havoc in his office, he sat down with a coffee and a crossword and felt extremely frustrated when he couldn’t complete it
  • So he sarcastically asked the prompt to what he thought was the empty room and was extremely surprised when an invisible figure plucked the pencil from his hand and answered the crossword
  • Peter was intrigued so he allowed your little game of him reading the prompts and you answering them until you both eventually finished it together
  • This made Peter much more tolerable to your presence as you two would do a crossword puzzle together whenever he had time or he felt your presence in his office
  • You had such a good relationship building up with each of them that they considered not trapping you and just letting you haunt the place in your own little harmless ways
  • But that was quickly scrapped when one day you accidentally took it too far
  • Dana had come to the headquarters to visit Peter and bring him coffee, and when she couldn’t find him she started wandering around looking for him
  • She followed the sound of music into the little garage section of the building and entered the room
  • You had been playing around with Ray at the time before he stepped out and when Dana came in you assumed she was Ray and gave her a little spook
  • This little spook however caused her to fall back and scrape her legs while the coffee spilled on her arm and gave her a small burn
  • You hadn’t meant to hurt her but she was so scared in that moment that she screamed
  • The commotion brought the four men down to her and misconstrued the scene as you purposely hurting Dana
  • Egon helped Dana with her injuries before sending her back home and calling a meeting
  • In this meeting he stated that you had become a dangerous and violent spirit and Peter quickly said that they should trap you, still raging over Dana getting hurt
  • They all agreed and before you knew it, they had cornered you as you clasped your hands together and pleaded for a second chance
  • They didn’t listen as they put you in the trap but the entire process felt like hit irons on your skin
  • You were eventually forced into this trap that to you looked like a jail cell from the inside before storing you with the rest of the ghosts and going on with their lives
  • Your afterlife was extremely mundane and painful as you were stuck in the trap for three months that felt like three years, with nothing to do and nowhere to go
  • The four men tried to go on with their lives but something distinct was missing
  • Out of routine kept accidentally doing the things that they would usually do with you and expecting you to show up
  • Egon would sit at the chess board and night before realising you weren’t coming and just playing a solo game of chess
  • Winston would set traps out for you to hide like he used to, only to find them still on the desk when he fishies counting to thirty
  • Ray would put his groove music on while he washed the car and waited for you to switch it over to pop, but you never came
  • Even Venkman, who was the most insistent on trapping you, would still accidentally read out a crossword puzzle prompt and wait for you to answer before finally realising that you weren’t there
  • So after three months and Dana explaining that she didn’t think you hurt her on purpose, they decided to release you from your trap
  • It was a relief to finally be free as you felt yourself becoming adjusted you your ghostly body again
  • The four ghost busters assumed that things were going to go back to the way they were, thinking that you wouldn’t be angry about the three months of entrapment
  • But you did remember and you were royally pissed off about it
  • You actively ignored all the efforts of the four men trying to contact you and you ignored all of their agologies (ray and Winston were the only ones to apologise)
  • You decided that they deserved to feel an inch of what you felt those painful three months
  • If they assumed you were dangerous and violent, you would give them dangerous and violent

Should I continue this? :)

So cool

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reblogged
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xhartbigx

Reblog if you’re over 20 and still read/write fan fiction.

I’m curious!

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fanaticsnail

I never thought I’d be back here again after all this time. Nearly 29 and I’m back in the f#<king building again!

I’m mainly writing on Ao3, but I thought I’d give this platform a go.

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damazcuz

*explaining kitchen appliances to my pet medieval knights* The microwave, or Micheal the Wavious, and metal fork, or Sir Silver Prong, are sworn enemies and can never cross paths lest their meeting spell destruction for all.

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Anonymous asked:

What about Bowser and a preggo Y/N?

And why not? :)

-------------

The frantic sound of bare feet slapping unevenly against cold, unforgiving stone echoes down the hallway, ricocheting off vast, stone walls and filling the oppressive space with the proof of your desperate escape.

Lungs heaving like a set of billows, you try your utmost to focus on throwing one foot out after the other, clutching an arm around your swollen belly in some futile attempt not to jostle the tiny life growing inside it as you lurch down the corridor, wincing with every step that pounds against the unforgiving stone beneath you.

Somewhere far behind you, from deep in the bowels of the fortress, a thunderous roar erupts into the air, chasing you through the doors that you've left swinging in your wake.

“Well-!” you puff down to your stomach, skidding around a corner and lumbering towards another set of enormous, stone doors, “He had to wake up eventually.”

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liquidstar

̤̤̤ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ̤̤̤

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̤̤̤̤̤̤

̤̤̤

̤̤̤̤̤̤̤̤

̤̤̤̤̤̤̤̤̤̤

̤̤̤̤̤̤̤̤

̤̤̤̤̤̤̤̤̤̤

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glumshoe

I’ll never understand why anthropomorphic animal cartoons like Robin Hood and Zootopia will go to the trouble of creating character designs that are meant to be understood as “attractive” or even “sexy” to the human audience but explicitly avoid showing interspecies romances between anthropomorphic animals. Why is THAT weird but, like, trying to make rabbits recognizably sexy-coded to humans isn’t?

Sometimes, sure, but why was Maid Marian a fox in Robin Hood? There wasn’t anything particularly “foxlike” about her personality, and it would make more sense for her to be a lion. They made her a fox only because Robin was a fox and making her something else would be “weird”, but I don’t think the wolf cop or the chicken maid or the lion prince were actually meant to represent race.

The best inter species couple is Kermit and Miss Piggy as the Cratchits in A Muppet Christmas Carol, because all their sons are frogs and all their daughters are pigs, as God clearly intended.

there are only two genders: frog and pig

I’ve pointed out to my friends that the fact that Kermit and Miss Piggy’s kids are like that means either

1) they reproduce asexually and the children are clones of each parent OR

2) Kermit and Miss Piggy are members of the same sexually dimorphic species, hence the split between their male and female children

yes I have spent too long running about potential muppet biology

oh god

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sailor-lady

Third option, when they want kids they get some fabric and make one, and hope a Hand inhabits it

Do you think there’s a ritual for inviting An Inhabiting Hand to possess the empty husk of your muppet baby?

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jenivi

Just wanted to show u guys that in Muppets Most Wanted, Piggy fantasizes about her and Kermit having babies and this is what they look like

So do with that what you will

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fremedon

Recall that in The Great Muppet Caper, Kermit and Fozzie are brothers. And this was their dad (right):

Thank you for specifying, which one of the two individuals in the picture was the dad haha

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la-pou-belle

I, for one, think Shrek handled interspecies coupling the best. By this I am of course talking about the Dronkeys.

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adrnired

In season 3 of BoJack Horseman, we learn Diane (middle) has been impregnated by Mr. Peanutbutter (left). The fetuses are confirmed to be puppies.

This is the worst addition to this post

I am reminded of Treasure Planet.

In which Captain Amelia (left), an extra terrestrial anthropomorphic cat, had hybrid babies with Doctor Doppler (middle), an extra terrestrial anthropomorphic dog, whom also gave birth to the babies

I always thought that in muppet movies like muppet Christmas Carol the characters are played by the muppets (so kermit is acting and playing the role of Bob rather than being him) so the kids in that film would just be other acting muppets right?

Or is that just something my brain made up?

Last time I saw this post (YESTERDAY) it stopped at the second Eggman

Last time I saw this

post (YESTERDAY) it stopped at

the second Eggman

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

anyone in this thread smoke weed

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susiron

In Leo the Lion (2005) a lion and elephant have the most cursed hybrid children and I think yall should see them

(also Matt Mercer voices the villain, Maximus Elefante and I think that’s very important)

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spaceinvaydr

I think that what they are talking about is perfectly clear.

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hiveswap
Image

Amogus

World Heritage Post

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andrewbelami

That’s a cute foot fetish you got there, would you mind keeping it 25796323689432 feet away from me?

25796323689432 feet you say?

This post turns 11 next month and it continues to be one of the funniest on this damn site

World Heritage Post

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amygdalae

Keying/graffiti-ing someones car is old news now if someone cheats we go at their wardrobe with a seam ripper

yknow what? Fuck you *unstitches all your shirts and jeans*

My mother did this to my father once. They got into an argument, my very pregnant and hormonal mother stormed off…except they lived in a tiny apartment so the only place to go was to shut herself into the closet for a good long sulk. And while she was sitting in there, fuming, she looked up and saw her sewing kit on the shelf, and all my father’s uniforms hanging right there.

So she picked one shirt and one pair of trousers, carefully, methodically ripped every third stitch out of every seam, and then hung them back up together so that he would be likely to pick them at the same time. This took her a couple hours, so by the time she was done, the anger had worn down. She came out, she and my father had a talk that ended in apologies, after which they were tired and went to bed. My mother swears up and down that she meant to warn my father about the sabotaged clothes in the morning, but he wore a different uniform set and they were both still feeling a little raw, so she didn’t want to bring up the fight again. She decided to tell him that night instead.

And then she forgot.

Anyway, about four days later, my father apparently came home roughly an hour after he left for work, his clothes slowly, gently shredding off his body, the most bewildered expression on his face. “Paula,” he said, his voice mildly shell-shocked. “Paula, my clothes are broken.”

My mother promptly burst out laughing so hard that she went into labor. And that’s the story of my birth, heralded by petty vengeance and utter confusion.

World Heritage Post

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reblogged

chillin on a Saturday night

Calm down jojo

you’re right, I am looking a little stiff here, I should try to relax

You call that “chillin”?

Everyone knows the best way to relax is with a good book and a warm drink

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totallyfubar

I dunno, man,

 sometimes I like just relaxing on my laptop

get on my level boys

Unfortunately to “get on your level” I’d need a boat trip to the Mariana Trench and a pair of cinderblock shoes.

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nerdgul

Thats gotta be the sickest burn ive ever read holy fuck

this post appears once every million years

I kept hoping someone else would one up me and I’d have to escalate even further but nobody has.

I don’t think it’s possible to one up you

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