Content warning: Death and grief It’s muggy today in the way that overcast summer days often are, the air thick with it. I really want to put my hair up, get it off my neck, it is somehow not soft anymore, but scratchy, straw-like. I don’t know why. But I had it blow-dried at the hairdresser yesterday and they do some kind of magic that once undone can’t be recaptured, so it sits uncomfortable on…

“Hey Anyone can get love Anyone can get laid You know you’re home when you find the ones who stay Brave enough not to tame They let you burst into flames Stoke the coals and then watch you blow They’re the ones make you trust in the universe When you’re lost and you’re left and it’s getting worse They’re the ones who you know will get you by We are all strange And it ain’t never never ever gonna…

For new dominants, there is often an internalised belief that they are ‘being mean’ to their submissives when they play. Especially when the play involves physical or emotional pain. Impact play, CBT, nipple torture, humiliation, degradation… This is true for many dominants, but it’s especially true for new dominant women who have been socialised their entire lives to ‘be nice’ and who often…

The lovely Axe from the Masocast invited me to have another chat with him and of course I said ‘yes’ to that :). My fourth interview for the Masocast! I am clearly his favourite :P. My earlier interviews can be found here: Inaugural Masocast interview (2012!) Second Masocast interview two years later My third Masocast interview in 2019 And here we are at number four :). Some snippets: I cannot…

This fantastic femdom podcast Q&A includes the following: Post-punishment rituals Sweetness in my ‘Ask Me‘s! Thank you D/s Kissing 101, an impassioned primer Money is complicating my relationship: Halp! How many ‘great loves’ have you had? Can I maintain my masculinity and be submissive? (spoiler: YES!) And more! The Domme Chronicles podcast is available on iTunes and Spotify: Subscribe if you…

I still haven’t ventured into the femdom sims since I last posted about femdom in Second Life, for the record. Instead I am trying my hand at adding scripts to simple objects because I’m curious and it’s fun to learn new things. RLV scripts, to be specific. WHAT HAS THIS GOT TO DO WITH FEMDOM, FERNS? JFC?!! Patience, grasshopper. RLV stands for Restrained Love Viewer. RLV (Restrained Love Viewer)…

I ventured into Second Life to check out the femdom sims some eleven years ago. I wrote some posts about how I found femdom in Second Life way back then: Sunday Curiosity #9 – Femdom in Second Life Intro Femdom in Second Life – Randomness Femdom in Second Life – My Thoughts Recently I was contacted by a lovely submissive, Roth, who was spending time in Second Life (SL) and I ventured back in…

This is adapted from my response to a question on Fetlife that I see a lot from submissives who have partners who are new and exploring their dominance: “How can I help my partner be more dominant?” These questions always seem to be accompanied by descriptions of what they’ve tried that essentially boil down to ‘I told her how to do (more of) my fetish to me’ and, unsurprisingly, that doesn’t…

In a book club chat with Joshua Tenpenny, the submissive half of the M/m couple who authored Real Service (if you haven’t browsed my non-fiction BDSM booklist yet, go take a look!), he talked about the realities of submission with years of real D/s relationship experience behind him, and I tell you what, discussions with people with that kind of experience is a breath of fresh air. One of the…

I went to a BDSM night at a goth club with a submissive female friend. It was the first time I had identified as a ‘Domme’ in public, I had never been to a club before, had no idea what to expect, had never really played with a submissive (at this stage, I had a remote submissive online, and had played as a sub to a very experienced Dom (another story)). The play area was not closed to the…

I wrote about my very dommely morning routine some years ago. My routine has changed since then, plus I’ve moved, so I no longer see the mountains out of my bedroom window: Boo. So I thought I’d do an update for those who are curious. I’m a creature of habit, it makes me feel calm and settled to go through the familiar motions of things. This means I am entirely predictable which is a bonus for…

One of the reasons I write my ‘How To’ Femdom Guides is because we talk a lot about the ‘what’ of BSDM-related things, but it’s very hard to find the ‘yeah but how do I do that’ level of detail in a way that we can use or adapt for ourselves. There are many many reasons for this, including nuance and complexity and the fear of being ‘one true way’-ish, but what that means is that we often never…

This is another femdom audio erotica story written and spoken by me. Thinking… About masturbating Thinking about you, and thinking about masturbating There’s some teasing… Maybe I would bring my cunt up close to your mouth And maybe I would ask you how much you wanted it And maybe I would stroke myself, close to your face And linger on my clit, and it would make me moan And some begging… And if…

I forgot to add in the ‘things I’ve been doing‘ list that I’ve been attending some live online BDSM classes. If you’ve ever been nervous or scared to go to local educational events, boy do I have a bonanza of goodness for you! Due to the lockdowns and restrictions, a lot of great BDSM educators and generous community folks have taken their previous ‘local-only’ skills and knowledge online to live…