i'm afraid the character limit in the former bird app is destroying my potential

two sentence horror story

Video games peaked in 2006 when in lego star wars the original trilogy, they couldn't have the iconic dialogue of darth vader telling luke skywalker he's his father because lego games didn't have dialogue at the time. So they just had to have vader point to a fuckin photograph of anakin and a pregnant padme

Diver convince octopus to trade his plastic cup for a seashell

imagine if a fuckin……. giant alien just showed up and stuck a huge hand in front of your face and then proceeded to offer you three different houses and wouldn’t stop until you moved out of your old shitty apartment and then helped you fuckin move

and then just left

I first saw this on twitter and COULD NOT get over these comments:

Twitter link

Tryna cleanly peel off the price sticker from your new book

"Why so /srs?"

-the woker

???

She absolutely thought that was gonna be some kind of sick fucking burn but it was not

If I had a nickel for every time a prominent right-wing media figure tried to pull a sick burn on twitter and in doing so, inadvertently implied that they want to have sex with one of their biological parents I would have two nickels

me when i get high off my ass on oedipals

Wage slave markiplier considered nsfw

i think we're all pretty good at reblogging images

i could've gone pro if i hadnt torn my URL in college

official fish post

Learning languages is SO FUN right up until you need to learn conjugation and then suddenly it turns sour real fucking fast

MC Escher

The willful misunderstanding of how Roe fell is truly a symptom of the wider issue that no one online seems to understand delayed gratification. The fall of Roe was a culmination of decades of conservative work to stack the lower courts with conservative judges, but understanding the idea of taking years to do something is outside the purview of a generation raised on instant gratification. The biggest vice of the Left is that many of them are de facto morally opposed to the very idea of playing the long game, but Republicans are more than happy to make gambits like the holding open of a SCOTUS seat in hopes a Republican president is elected no matter how hypocritical it makes them seem.

"people show their true colours in life threatening situations" no, they show you what they act like when they're mortally terrified, an emotion notorious for literally turning your entire brain off to the point where people who go into those situations as a profession need to be literally trained on how to not have that happen

i am SO glad you asked because i was in fact having an imaginary argument in my head with 'The Joker' from 'The Dark Night' and every other made-up villain that tries to sound edgy and deep with this kind of nihilism because they annoy the hell out of me

if ur wondering how the art degree is going 2 months post grad.

i found a job that pays $1.15 an hour :]

another one ..although im p sure this one was written fully by ai. also they have an ugly website

wjat