I’m glad that people want to help others, that’s a good thing. But when people think that orphaned kids need to be saved, or argue that “all children are problem children,” it erases the hardships that those people face. If you want to become a foster/adoptive parent, do your research, help yourself so you can actually help someone else. Most orphaned kids have experienced real, traumatic loss, often at a young age, that impact every aspect of their life for the rest of their life. It’s different than having a “rebellious phase,” it isn’t something that they “just get over.” People who are wary of older adoptees might come off like asshats, but the idea that they are “problem children” is because… well, they’re children who have had psychological trauma that is often unresolved, and manifests itself as “problems.” I’m not saying wanting to adopt is a bad thing, I’m saying that people who adopt, especially older adoptees, should be extra ready to support their kids emotionally, and not expect those kids to be immediately grateful, or to love them unconditionally, or to even treat you like “family.”
As an adopted child of a baby boomer, whose life experience has been “you should be grateful, you should love unconditionally, you were saved from an awful life,” I can’t wait to see a new generation of adoptive parents who care about their kid’s psychological well-being, who truly want the best for their kids, and who educate themselves about good parenting, especially for kids who’ve experienced life without good/any parents.