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nothing personnel kid

@jetpacksquirrel / jetpacksquirrel.tumblr.com

idk what im doing ever
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pirateprincessjess

When I was a kid my family pretended to get raptured so I would think I was left behind on earth while they all went to heaven.

I was like 8 years old and my sister and mom had gotten really into the Left Behind novels (bible fan fic about the rapture). In the books when the rapture happened the clothes that people were wearing when they got raptured were left behind in neatly folded piles.

One day when I was getting home from school my family decided that they would leave piles of neatly folded clothes around the house, and then hide in the basement.

The intended effect was that I would get home and see the clothes then, think that my family had been raptured and that I wasn’t good enough to get into heaven… or something?

The problem was that I had never read these books, and didn’t really think about the rapture very often. There was no reason that I would see some laundry on the floor and think “The rapture happened and I’ve been abandoned by God! I’ll never see my family again!! Oh nooo!!!!”

I just sat down and watched cartoons and eventually my family got bored and revealed that they were all hiding in the basement.

It’s a good thing I didn’t understand the joke, otherwise that shit would have been traumatic.

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dietspam16
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clownboybebop
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cursed-40k-thoughts
Anonymous asked:

Who is the biggest Chad in Warhammer 40k?

cursed-40k-thoughts answered:

Jurgen was an unwashed porn addict who was also a null and had the two jobs of making tea and carrying a giant blowtorch around for the express purpose of incinerating things at his own discretion. He never elaborated on anything in his life and died of old age. That motherfucker won 40k, as far as that setting goes. Absolute gigachad behaviour the entire time.

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