Remember Kids,

pussy ravenous pussy cavernous

im down bad need that pussy intravenous

pussy vicarious pussy precarious

with ill intent call that pussy nefarious

pussy vigorous pussy chivalrous

devouring that meat means the pussy carnivorous

pussy vicious pussy delicious

the stars have aligned so the pussy’s auspicious

pussy glorious pussy notorious

rings in the age of the pussy victorious

@official-pussy-posts

Official Pussy Post

owww. owwwuh. fuck. wait. *pulls out* theres a damn rock in your pussy man.

the tags on this post are absolutely rancid. good work everyone

@official-pussy-posts

Official Pussy Post

Sorry for being such a slow writer, it's because I [remembers that self-deprecating jokes are harmful to my mental health and make everyone else uncomfortable] was attacked by dark spirits and washed up on the shore of a mysterious island with no recollection of who I was

the idealized version of my tomorrow self will fix this

not again

She'll fuck me if I cook good enough I know it

#billions of humans have thought this same thing over the course of the species’ history #and they were right

you all hate the position i sleep in because you haven’t advanced to my level and you’re jealous of my mental acuity and caustic wit as well as being extremely good at sleeping

What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

Hey? You doin alright @ghost--bot ??

As a former humanities student, I feel it is my duty to reblog this one.

A tech bro tried to convince me AI was amazing cause "you could make 30,000 screenplays in minutes" not realising that every single one would be shit, you'd have to sift through everything just to find some good bits, time wasted that could've been spent just writing a screenplay.

Technology Brothers know nothing about what goes into creating a work, other than the fact a work has been created to be exploited for cash. They see creativity as an investment opportunity, not a love for humanity.

Matthew Dow Smith: "Just remember: Arts & Humanities are so useless and pointless that Tech Bros were driven to spend billions of dollars to try and get a computer to do something that badly approximates something Arts & Humanities students could do half asleep and wired on coffee the night before the due date."

I’m fine

I need divine intervention

“Nobody’s going to want to sit on high-speed rail for fifteen hours to get from New York City to LA.”

Me. I will sit on high-speed rail for fifteen hours. I’ll sit on it for days. I’ll write and read and nap and eat and then do it all over again. I’ll stare out the windows and see America from ground level and not have to drive. I’ll see the Rockies and the deserts and cornfields and the Mississippi River and your house and yours and yours too. I’ll make up stories in my head about the small towns I see as we go along. I’ll see the states I’ve yet to see because driving or flying there is a fucking slog and expensive to boot. I’ll enjoy the ride as much as the destination. And then I’ll do it all over again to come the fuck home.

Me getting slammed with notifications on this post in particular:

:)

I used to love going to San Diego for Comic Con by train. I’d start in Chicago, take a train that would take two or three days of bimbling through lower Illinois and Texas and New Mexico and I’d get to LA and then a commuter train to San Diego. I’d meet thousands of people in San Diego and then I’d get on the train in LA and go up the coast and then head East and spend another day or two decompressing until I got off in Minneapolis St Paul. It was the best time of the year. Sometimes I’d write and sometimes I’d stare out of the window.

On my trip to see my family last weekend, I stayed in my brother’s basement, and that’s where the Hamm’s sign lives.  Since it was lit up and everything, I thought I’d take some pics of it and share.

The Hamm’s On Tap sign has been a fixture of our basements since I was little.  I don’t know where my dad got it; he had a lot of old kitschy plastic beer advertising stuff that he put in the basement because he’d built a little bar down there, and we used to hang out down there and have happy hour and stuff.  (Later, it was the only place in the house that got cable, so I had to watch MTV down there.)  We didn’t keep most of that memorabilia, but my brother kept the Hamm’s sign.

Hamm’s Brewery was originally from St. Paul, Minnesota, and their advertising featured a lot of outdoorsy themes.  I’m not sure if Hamm’s is even still made? I think Miller bought them out.  Regardless, having the sign was very exotic because back in those days it sure wasn’t a beer being sold in eastern Pennsylvania.  

The sign above is one of the simpler versions, and when I was looking online for comparable examples, I couldn’t actually find other pics of this style.  At any rate, the much more common and well-known style looks like this:

With the label panel on the left, and a scene on the right, and the shingled “roof”.  (The scene varies, but I picked an example with the waterfall for a reason.)

Why am I sharing this?  Because from the first episode of Gravity Falls, I felt that sense of nostalgia for my own childhood every time we saw the living room of the Mystery Shack:

Even though the Shack’s light-up sign is based on the more common type above, rather than the type my family had, it was still immediately recognizable to me, and I had a feeling the Shack’s was still based on the old Hamm’s signs even though I hadn’t seen that style.  Nice to confirm it, though. :)

I suspect that Alex Hirsch included it because he also likes the “H” for “Hirsch”.  But I wouldn’t be surprised if either his Grandpa Stan, or his Great-Aunt with whom he and Ariel spent summers, had one of those Hamm’s signs somewhere.

There’s another light-up “H” sign in the Shack living room:

That’s not a sign style I recognize, but it looks more neon than the plastic sheet type seen above.  The “H” is done in the same style, though, so I think the implication is that it’s advertising from the same brewery company as the sign above Stan’s chair.  (That light fixture over the dining table is also so 70s I just can’t stand it.  The style of the dining table, actually, is older; we used to have an oak one very like that in my Mom’s old house, but it was really beat up and nobody kept it.  The ends of the legs ended in lion’s paws though.)

Anyway, just a small thing I wanted to share. :) 

A question about the glowing “H” sign came up on the GF subreddit today, and led me to revisit this post from 2018. In doing so, we also discovered some more examples of replica Hamm’s signs in the show, and also, discovered the fictional name of this beer in the GF universe! So, time for an update.

(First – back when this was first posted, a couple of days later someone responded to assure me that Hamm’s is still made, and sold, including in the PNW. See that response here.)

Okay! Buckle in!

Thanks to reddit user u/FordBeWithYou, we now know the name of this fictional beer: Hürzch. That’s because other advertisements for it are seen in the Skull Fracture bar, that we see in “Headhunters” and “The Stanchurian Candidate”:

Behind Manly Dan is the fully-spelled-out name. In the foreground you can see another lit-up sign, with the log up top, showing woodsy scenery.

That log-on-top sign is the one I can’t really source an original example for. (Well, also not the neon “H”, or this neon “Hürzch” sign above; but those are more generic, less specific to the Hamm’s brand signage.) At least, not so far.

This jagged barrel sign, though, is easy!

(Can we take a minute to appreciate the SCARE-O DACTYLS biker gang vest on the guy at right? I like how that creates a through-line in the show from the photo of the pterodactyl that has always been in the opening credits, to, of course, the episode “Land Before Swine”.)

Here’s the jagged barrel sign again, along with that log-on-top landscape sign:

And here’s the Hamm’s Beer sign it’s based on:

I mean, the drawing of that canoe scene is pretty exact!

There’s one more example in the bar:

And that’s the mountain landscape Hürzch sign in the upper left.

I also can’t find a precise Hamm’s model for this sign, although there are some that are similar (in that they’re portrait-oriented woodsy landscapes, with the Hamm’s name on them.)

Like this one.

Clearly, when it was time for Ian Worrel to design the inside of the bar, he must have searched for vintage bar signs – but the fact that these are all for ONE brand of (fictional) beer, and they’re all kind of based on the Hamm’s signs, is telling.

I’m still guessing that Alex, or Ian, had a relative with one of the Hamm’s signs like the one behind Stan’s chair. That is absolutely the kind of kitschy decor that you’d find in a man-cave-like log cabin full of other 70s decor, and that very much describes the Shack (but could also describe the older relatives of someone on the team).

This is the kind of little question I’d love to ask Ian Worrel or Alex. It doesn’t MEAN anything, but to me, it’s interesting. DID they get the idea for the sign from one they knew in real life? Did Ian create other signs for the bar from existing vintage Hamm’s signs, because those all have such a woodsy theme, that they seem to fit the aesthetic of the town of Gravity Falls? I can see that being the case.

I would kill to get ahold of one of the big Hamm’s Scene-o-Rama signs, like the one behind Stan’s chair. Those suckers go for thousands of dollars now, though. I’m actually tempted to try to recreate one, and make it specifically Gravity Falls themed.

Titania & Oberon

Happy Anniversary to my all time favorite movie.

Ever.

That’s Louis Rossman, a repair technician and YouTuber, who went viral recently for railing against Apple. Apple purposely charges a lot for repairs and you either have to pay up or buy a new device. That’s because Apple withholds necessary tools and information from outside repair shops. And to think, we were just so close to change.

Follow @the-future-now

Reblog if you:

No one will know which is it

This guy inspired me to repair my own macbook. First of all, you should know that I am not… like, I have to look up HOW to look up what my computer specifications are. Tech, that ware either soft or hard, is not a subject in which I experience comfort or competence. But my puppy peed on my keyboard, and I asked the apple store, or the fucking mac cafe, or the godsdamn Computer House Chill Zone or whatever cute ass name they have for their bullshit store, and they said it would be TWELVE HUNDRED DOLLARS TO REPLACE MY KEYBOARD. I’m not even exaggerating.

So I asked the internet, well how hard IS it to repair? And I saw this guy’s video, and while I am no techie, I AM fueled by spite, so I was all “oh, they do that shit on purpose specifically so they can charge me $1200 bucks or make me buy a new computer hunh? FUCK THEM” and I bought all the tools I needed for about $25 and I bought all the parts I needed for about another $25 and I watched a few tutorial videos, and I replaced my own keyboard.

So, once you are doing the actual deed, it becomes pretty obvious that they are finding creative ways to make this much harder than it has to be on purpose. On thing that stood out to me is, instead of all the tiny screws being the same size, there are about two dozen very slightly different sizes. They could easily be all the same size, or like, two sizes at most, but no.

These mother fuckers will take a panel that screws into place and they’ll use a different size screw for each corner. They are so close that you almost cannot tell them apart visually, but they each will only screw into the matching corner. Like, it’s a pretty clear “fuck you” to anyone trying to do repairs.

anyway, this guy is also fueled by spite, and doing holy work, and I have mad respect

This is awesome. Man is doing good ass deeds 24/7 because he’s giving people control.

How dare you not leave a link to his channel, this guy is the savior of the modern world.