I'm horny and suicidal

Col. Anthony Joseph Drexel Biddle, hand-to-hand combat expert, 1943. Known for ordering trainee Marines to attempt to kill him with bayonets, and disarming them all.

Same energy

Now that is some vintage sports goth

This ad is very ominous and threatening.

Are you fucking kidding me

and yes but what a shame what a shame the poor groom’s bride is a 

Is this the kids bop version

its like marine biology Jackass

i love this guy 60% of every video is him rolling around on the floor screaming while his camera guy goes “hey….. u ok?” then 5 minutes later he gets up and is like “ok folks, there u have it, the Satan DeathRay Fire Monster actually does cause pain when it bites u. science is great”

To be fair, this is actually a really good way of getting kids to realize that these animals really are dangerous, and he goes through the first aid either on the same video or in a follow up video (if it’s something complicated). IIRC, the whole reason he started doing videos like this was because while he was in Montana or something he saw a lot of Facebook posts about people whose dogs had gotten too close to a porcupine and they didn’t know how to remove the quills, so he (naturally) went into the woods, found a porcupine, quilled himself and filmed himself taking the quills out and explaining what he was doing.

He’s still fucking insane, but, you know, it’s for a good cause

He’s living his best life, his job is getting hurt on camera and educating others on how to be safe. And he clearly loves his job.

The rightful heir to the throne Steve Irwin left.

but what if a vampire drank the blood of someone who was anemic like would they be seriously grossed out

“what the fuck is this”

“i have anemia”

“can you take something for that you should probably take something for that this shit is nasty to drink let alone have running through your body i’m setting up a doctor’s appointment for you”

“dude really you don’t have to just leave what the fu—”

“you disgust me here take these iron supplements”

“where did you even get th—”

“shut up and take your pills and dont forget your vitamin D”

“i’m going to check up on you weekly to make sure you’re taking them”

“that’s not necessary”

“maybe we should work on a dietary plan with foods rich in iron and other things for you”

“do you get this involved with all of your meals”

VAMPIREDUDE: did u get the cookbook i orderd 4 u

ME: Oh my god, first of all stop using text speak, you told me you were 278, second how did you know where I LIVED, third yes I got it.

VAMPIREDUDE: heard onions were good 4 blood, eat lots

ME: So you can have a tasty meal? I guess you’d rather I stay away from garlic, huh.

VAMPIREDUDE: UR being v rude I just got u a present!!!

ME: THE COOKBOOK IS CALLED “HOW TO TASTE DELICIOUS,” I AM CALLING THE COPS

#sounds like the begining of a beautiful friendship #gimme this sitcom

The Sun will go down eventually!

I love an overprotective vampire threatening their charge/food source with the line “the sun will go down eventually!”.

don’t talk to me until i’ve eaten my morning ass

i wish i could say “?????????” in real life it would be very useful

[x]

Me, a barber, shaving my client’s head: seth everman

GO GO GADGET!

I just love that angle in the first gif, ya hardly see that ever.

whats in that unnecessarily big backpack Itachi