Who’s you’re favorite character in fruits basket? Mine’s Kisa!

Cloudbursts

Pairing: Jared Padalecki x Reader

Summary: You were determined to do it. You never told anyone about your fear and you wouldn’t let it bring you down to your knees now! Not in front of all these people! Well, the anxiety attacks were an obstacle you didn’t think of…

Word Count: 1,543

Warnings: Anxiety attacks, please don’t read this if it triggers your own attacks! Aquaphobia

Author’s Note: Maybe it’s a bit based upon the song ‘Control‘ by Zoe Wees…  Based on this request by @fortheentries​. Hey! Could you do please one where the reader is an actor with anxiety and she has to do a scene with Jared and Jensen that triggers a panic attack. Jared understands and helps her calm down :) Enjoy reading and leave some feedback.

“Coffee. Coffee! Who wants coffee? I brought coffee!” you announced as you entered Jared’s trailer. It was the usual meeting place for the three of you. Jensen lay spread out all over Jared’s bed, shoes on, his head buried in the pillow. Your entry made him jump up from the pillow. He still looked sleepy and his blond hair stood wildly away in all directions. “Coffee? Did I hear right? Where’s the coffee?” he asked and looked around frantically, which made you laugh. Then he saw you with the three cups in the door. “Oh, you are my lifesaver! Gimme! Gimme!” He reached for them. “Here’s your elixir of life, you junkie,” you said with a laugh and handed him a cup, which he immediately put to his lips and burned himself. “Fuck.” he cursed and you rolled your eyes with a grin. It was the same every morning.

Jared came out of the bathroom and snorted. “Jensen just isn’t ready to learn at this time of day,” he said, shaking his head and smiling at you broadly with his sweet grin, which you fell a little more for him every day. “Good morning, Y/N.” Oh, damn. He always pronounced your name so seductively in his deep voice. Why did your name sound like music coming out of his mouth? Your own thoughts confused you and you decided to pull yourself together. “Morning, Jared.” You muttered and hugged him. He returned the hug, and maybe your touch lingered a little too long… “Thanks for the coffee,” Jared said, and his lips touched your cheek for a moment and his stubble scratched your soft skin. Then he turned away. “Come on, Jay! Rise and shine, we got to get to the set!” Jensen moaned and hid his head back in the pillow before he reluctantly picked himself up and stood up. He also hugged you briefly and had to yawn heartily. Jared shook his head with a grin. “Come on, now.”

A short time later you were brought to the set in a golf buggy. Jensen went through his lines one last time and sipped his coffee. Jared was talking to the driver, who was just telling him something about his family in Portland and you were just watching the movie area passing by. Soon your vehicle slowed down and the driver dropped you off at the trailer for the mask. You were changing when Jensen came around the corner and was still holding his script in his hand, which he was now waving with excitedly. He was already completely in Dean’s costume. “Hey, look!” he drew the attention of Jared and you. “Today is the water scene! I forgot all about that.” Almost instantly, your fingers tensed around the back of your seat. He wasn’t the only one who forgot. You’d been trying to block that out for weeks, and apparently that worked so well, it made you panic.

“Shit, Y/N?” Jared looked at you anxiously from the side while Jensen was already called to the set. “Are you not feeling well? You look pale.” You just swallowed and shook your head. “I’m okay.” I squeezed his hand, but I could tell by the look in his eyes he didn’t believe a word of it. Jared was called to the set a few minutes later, and you were left alone. You wanted to take another sip of your coffee, but your hand was shaking too much and the coffee almost spilled over, so you left the cup on the table.

You too were called to the set a little later. As soon as you arrived on the set, you could already see the cameras and spotlights set up to illuminate the scene. When you saw the green pool, you automatically pulled your robe a little tighter around your shaking body.

You should play a scene in a lake where you try to hunt a water demon together. The only problem was that you were terrified of water. Of course, no rain or water glasses or showers. But with bathtubs it was getting critical. Not to mention the ocean or a pool. That fear was deeply embedded in you, almost paralysing you. You stood irresolutely on the edge of the pool. Jensen was in costume and already standing in the pool while you were standing at the edge of the water. 
"Jump in!“ he shouted to you laughing and was happy like a toddler about all the water. Without waiting for your answer, he disappeared. You were standing at the edge of the water and your toes got wet. When Jensen resurfaced, his blond hair stuck wet in his forehead and he shook like a wet dog. Your breathing became heavier and suddenly the pool in front of you seemed to go down endlessly. You couldn’t make out the bottom anymore. Your chest tightened and no matter how much air you sucked in, you felt like you were suffocating.

Then Jensen splashed you wet and your heartbeat shot up. It almost exploded in your chest. Your chest became tight and you gasped for air. Blackness ran in to the edges of your eyes and took your sight. Your hands tightened around your robe and your vision became blurry. You had the feeling of drowning in air and at the same time not getting enough of it. Your lungs burned and screamed for oxygen. At that moment, Jared, who was standing a little further away, noticed your panic. “Cameras off! Cameras off!” he shouted and hurried over to you. “Jensen, shut the hell up.”

Your chest was heaving and you tried to fill your lungs with oxygen. You were so anxious to just breathe. Unpleasant memories rushed through your mind. Fear sweat was on your forehead and your eyes were still fixed on the water in front of you. The noise around you only penetrated you as if from far away. You didn’t notice Jared until his arms wrapped tightly around you. “C'mon, sweetie, breathe! In and out. In and out. Let’s get you into my trailer. Can you walk for me?” He felt your heart pounding in your chest. Your hands were ice cold and your breath left your lungs shaky.

In the trailer, he pulled you right into his arms. While he cradled you in his strong arms, you hid your face in the crook of his neck and breathed deeply the familiar smell of Jared. Gently, he put his chin on your head. “It’s all fine, sweetheart. Just breathe. You can do it. Just breathe in -” He waited some seconds while your chest heaved drawing air in. “And breathe out - that’s it. And again. C'mon.” His deep voice slowly calmed you down. You had your fingers cramped in his shirt and felt his strong heartbeat under the thin piece of cloth. His chest rose and fell regularly as he did breathing exercises with you. You pushed yourself a little closer to him and he pulled you tighter.

Gently he led you over to his bed, then he lay down. His head was propped up and he meant for you to lay your head on his chest. Shyly you lay down next to him, bedded your head on his chest and listened to his heart pumping. Softly he counted your breaths with you and you finally got your breath back. His body radiated a pleasant warmth and his fingertips glided gently over your arm. “Jared?” Your voice broke. “I’m right here, baby,” he said, pressing a kiss on your head.

“I don’t wanna loose control.” You whispered into the silence of the trailer. “It’s okay to lose control.” Then you both fell silent. His fingers kept moving up and down your arm. Only the ticking of a distant clock could be heard. A few minutes later you broke the silence again.

“When I was a child, my parents took my brother and me on a trip to a bathing lake. I had just turned fourteen. We visited this lake every summer and my brother and I used to play the game of who dared to swim further out. We competed to swim to the small island in the lake - we had never reached it before, but my brother was seventeen and had had a growth spurt. He passed me with powerful strokes and soon I was far behind him.” Jared listened to me, then he interrupted me. “I didn’t even know you had a brother.” You swallowed, then you went on with your story. “It was our last swim race. He drowned that very evening. The circumstances were never explained. "None of the doctors could say what it was. Maybe a cramp? A heart attack? A stroke? Rare among young people, but not impossible.” You were silent for a moment.

“Since then, I can’t go in the water anymore. I’m terrified of it." Only now did you realize that hot tears were streaming down your cheeks. Jared wiped them away in a hurry. "I’m sorry about that.”   “I don’t wanna loose control,” you repeated. His fingers grabbed your face and twisted it towards him. His eyes found yours. “I will always be there to catch you. Every single time, I promise you.”

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