u can still be thug as hell even if you cry everyday right

I’m super sleeeepy

how dare you come into my house and disrespect my stuffed animals,

My aunt’s cat is very shy and hides when there are guests in her house. She semi-trusts my parents and will at least be in the same room as them. Tonight, my dad made some progress:

me, single, dishing out relationship advice

via

Some gay shit shows up on TV

My homophobic mom: It is a shame really. We know there are gay people but they shouldn’t put it on TV like it’s something good.

Me (who is gay as f): YES! DISHONOUR ON THEM! DISHONOUR ON THEIR COW! DISHONOUR!

Then we sit there like:

I love going to Olive Garden to get bred

getting absolutely rawed at the olive garden

sometimes harvest mice sleep in tulips. here are some that will make you happy

thanks. Have a great day

I’m stupid and bi and it’s all u need to know about me

I hate that bugs don’t take fall damage

How I knock a spider off the ceiling and that shit hit the ground and start running

there are 4 planets in retrograde right now plus a full moon and everyone i know is either off the walls horny, disassociating, or more depressed than usual

(via elizwsmith)

Robot cummies

Hey James do you take constructive criticism?

Only on business days

Fine I’ll wait

This post fucking sucks

im like disgustingly kinky and not ashamed but i probably should be