Voltage Honest Trailers: Enchanted in the Moonlight
Thanks for all the love and support from everyone who liked my Gangsters in Love Homest Trailer! Because of you all I will continue to make more of these in the form of a series based on the ones you all request!
Please remember that this is only for humorous purposes.
Also I do not own Voltage and if I did, I’d make badass and more culturally diverse MC’s!
Enjoy!
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Narrator: Are you ready for a Voltage game that is filled with romance and Asian culture?
Are you willing to spend your paycheck on a story to satisfy your furry obsession?
Then this romance sim about yokai is sure to delight your unhealthy attraction to animals!
(Cue Yokai Anime)
Narrator:…No not those yokai…
(Beat)
Enchanted in the Moonlight!
(Cue Enchanted in the Moonlight Theme)
In eastern Japan, there lives a young MC.
She’s a naive bookworm with a life and a personality that is even shallower and blander than Belle from Beauty and the Beast.
MC: “I have no boyfriend, I’m too serious, and I work too hard…maybe it’s finally getting to me…😓”
Narrator: The MC is so retarded, she thinks closing her eyes in a life threatening situation will save her life.
MC:(I reflexively squeeze my eyes shut as bookshelves tumble down towards me!😣)
MC:(I shut my eyes as a speeding car rushes for me!😣)
Voltage Vlogger Martha: “No girl, that’s not how danger works…😒”
(Slight Beat)
Narrator: The MC lives in a bento box far far away from her parents with her close friend Samon, who is really a spirit from another world sent to stalk the MC since her high school years.
MC: “Samon’s the shrine priest. He’s like a big brother who watches over me.”
Narrator: After waking up from a night terror about a scene from Spirited Away and about hot guys, the MC goes to work and encounters MORE hot guys who stalk and warn her to be cautious of her surroundings instead of outright telling her that demons are out to get her!
Shinra: “I want you to be careful today.😑”
MC:(I wonder why he said that😦)
Narrator: Really…?😒
(Beat)
After the retarded MC risks rabies disease by stripping down and taking a bath with a random fox she found on the street, MC finds out the the fox is actually a beautiful spirit with realistic fox ears and a tail.
MC: “Is he a cosplayer?😦”
Narrator: I said realistic…😒
(Beat)
MC goes back to her living room seeing the same hot guys freeloading. And once learning that they are ayakashi from another world, they each have one request from her to help save their people.
Yukinojo: “We would like to have a child with you.😃”
(Beat)
Narrator: After being attacked by evil ayakashi, MC Is forced to make a dreadful decision of her life…
Lose your virginity…or DIE!
MC: “But I don’t know pleasure…!😰”
(Beat)
Narrator: MC has the option to choose…
Miyabi!
The sexy arrogant half breed who makes it no secret that he wants to fuck the MC dry.
He’s a man so perverted, that calling him a fuckboy or a rapist would be a complete understatement!
Miyabi: “Give me your body…😌”
Miyabi: “You’ll be lusting for me from inside your bed😏”
Narrator: His sex drive is so strong, he’d give prostitutes in Vegas a run for their money.
Yukinojo: “Miyabi would sleep with 10 girls in one night!😃”
(Beat)
Narrator: Chikage! The Sasuke of the game!
Unlike his privileged friends, he rose up from complete nothingness and earned his spot to become the next hokage of the Tengu clan.
Although he has a soft spot for cute little boys, he’s so emo that it’s clear that he needs pussy in his life.
But he has NO problems flirting with actual crows whatsoever…
Chikage: “Caw caw caw!😄”
Narrator: Okay! SOMEONE needs to take YOU to the strip…😒
(Beat)
Shinra!
The oni who resembles and dresses like a prepubescent middle school kid, and who has an unhealthy obsession with Victoria’s Secret underwear!
Boy: “Tiger print underpants aren’t cool-😒”
Shinra: “YES THEY ARE!😡”
Narrator:
He’s the love interest that no one gives a fuck about. And the one who took over a YEAR to get a season 2 because Voltage forgot his ass.
Although he was first introduced alongside Miyabi and Chikage, he becomes the most unpopular character in the Voltage franchise with his childish personality and annoying and constant blushing behavior that Voltage would make fans believe to be a cute trait.
Miyabi: “You’re as red as an ogre!😏”
Miyabi: “What’s wrong with calling a red oni a red oni?😂”
Shinra: “Grrrrrrr….!😡”
(Beat)
Narrator:
Kyoga!
The badass bisexual of the group! And the best dressed!
He’s the only one who treats you like a human being if you choose him.
Although he makes no secret of his attraction for you, it’s more than clear he has a thing for Yukinojo.
Kyoga: “I watched this movie about a Okami man and a Yukibito woman…it made me feel weird…😳”
Kyoga: “You know you’re very beautiful Yuki!😄”
Yukinojo: “Y'know I am a man…😓”
Narrator: That doesn’t excuse the fact that you enjoyed being fed by Kyoga during MC’s date with Kiryu at a restaurant…just admit you’re gay!😒
(Beat)
Yukinojo!
The other bisexual and the Caitlyn Jenner of the gang!
The one MC literally falls in love with JUST because of his looks!
MC: “You’re so beautiful…😍”
MC: “You have such gorgeous skin!☺️”
Narrator: He’s kindhearted as he is two faced as he even tried to rape MC at one point and is willing to threaten anyone with his power of snow and ice.
Kyoga: “Yuki’s scary when he’s angry…😰”
Narrator:
With his obsession with Bath and Body Works products and being beautiful, Voltage might as well could have made Yuki a female option of the game which…might increase sales for Voltage…
Just look at the amemix line!😃
(Beat)
And Kiryu!
The cynical as fuck, runaway prince of the ryu clan who came to the human world to write fanfiction AND be a total weeaboo for Japanese technology!
Kiryu: “Do you know how much this tablet costs?!😒”
Kiryu: “Did you wreck my cleaning robot?!😤
Kiryu: “Who destroyed my Japanese toilet?!😡”
Narrator: He hates people so much, that he’s even racist towards his own kind.
Kiryu: “I don’t care for the humans or the ayakashi! They irritate me!😒”
(Beat)
As you live your days being the only woman in a household full of men, you are forced to deal with things LIKE:
Perverse Humor!😃
Miyabi: “Have you two been at it every night?😏”
Chikage: “Oh, so that’s it…😏”
Kyoga: “We can smell what you’ve been doing.😏”
Narrator: No longer having privacy!😁
Samon: “Everyone gets to live here!😃”
Shinra: “Dibs on the biggest room!😄”
MC: “Do you have to follow me to work?😓”
Narrator: AND: “Trump like” RACISM!😑
Chikage: “Humans are weak.😒”
Kyoga: “Humans aren’t like us ayakashi who have more strength.😕”
Shinra: You’re weird! A human interested in oni…😒"
Miyabi: “You’re just a human!😠”
Ayakashi: “Stupid human!😡”
Ayakashi: “Yeesh! Humans!😡”
Miyabi: “A regular human wouldn’t be allowed in our world.😏”
Miyabi: “A human an ayakashi can’t be together.😠”
(Slight beat)
Narrator:…Wait a minute! Wait a minute! So humans can’t go to the Mononoke World but Ayakashi can freely roam the human world like rats and mistreat them however they please?!
Trump: “We need to BUILD A WALL to keep those filthy ayakashi OUT from crossing that magical train BORDER! And those clan heads will pay for it!"👌🏻
Narrator:..Trump I hate you but I support that idea!😃🔨
People of color:😡😡😡
Narrator:…Too soon?😅😓
Trump: “CROOKED Miyabi! LYIN’ CHIKAGE!😤😡”
Narrator: Okay we get it! It’s bad enough you were elected…😓
(Beat)
STARRING:
“Tomoe”(Miyabi)🐈
“Teen Wolf”(Kyoga)🐺
“Shrek”(Shinra)👹
“Scarecrow”(Chikage)🐦
“Male Elsa”(Yukinojo)❄️
“Potential Housewife”(Samon)👩🏻
“Blue Eyes White Dragon”(Kiryu)🐉
“Regina Gorge”(Ageha)💁🏼
“Gohan”(Koten)🙇🏻
The Three Stooges(The Omnyoji)👨👨👦
“Someone who may as well be an ayakashi with her ability to sense things!”(Ikumi)👀
“Ino Yamanaka”(Botan)✳️
“Ultear Milkovich”(Kirikimi)🔮
“Darth Vader”(Kuro Kabuto)👽
“Kapp'n”(Hikobei)🐸
“Master Roshi”(Genji)👴🏻
“Jacob Black”(Aoi)👱🏻
“Taylor Swift”(Nishiki)🐍
“Kimiko”(Kikuka)🇯🇵
And
“As told by a Ginger, I am a Virgin(MC)😔”
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“Yokai BAEwatch!!!”
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Narrator: Okay seriously?! How is it that ayakashi can’t get arrested in the human world JUST because they aren’t “bound” to human laws! If you GO to another country you HAVE to follow those rules or you get arrested!
Couldn’t the MC just call the cops and tell them their are strange men claiming to be spirits who want to fuck her?
That would be helpful considering how they would be sent to the crazy house! Not to mention charged for frequent harassment!
Mamoru, get over here already!
Mamoru: *sigh* fine…😒🚬
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