@existentialburden / existentialburden.tumblr.com
the loyal as a dog trope but the person they’re loyal to never wanted a dog
‘i gave you everything’ ‘no one asked you to’
they liked you better when you weren’t their’s to have. they don’t like the person you are around them.
you worship the ground they walk on and force them to trample you in the process
It was my first time wearing a costume, my first participation in a cosplay event, and, of course, I wanted to make an impression. I wanted people to come up to take pictures and ask about cosplay.
And I was upset when this didn't happen. I watched as visitors approached other participants and asked to take photos with them, but they passed me by, and I felt like I didn’t fit in. Again.
I tried to be friendly, I even put one of the Argentine cockroaches on my hand to show it and give it to those who wanted to hold it (Argentine cockroaches are very cute, they generally look more like woodlice than cockroaches, they are quite calm and they have a beautiful segmented shell). But it didn't work.
After the event, I told how upset I was to my friend, who came to support me and help me with my performance. I said that I don’t know what exactly the matter was. I had several versions: my costume is bad and ridiculous; no one knows where the character is from and therefore they are not interested; this is an anime event and therefore I don’t fit in; I'm doing something wrong; all of the above at once in any combination.
She looked at me strangely and said that she would soon send me something that would immediately make the situation clearer to me.
Today, she sent me a video that she edited from the videos filmed at the event. I thought she only filmed my performance and took photos the rest of the time. But it turns out she filmed the reactions of people around. Hah, I was wondering why she was always behind!
I watched the video and realized that the reason seemed to be something else altogether. I actually didn’t take into account that insects can make people so nervous (even something as harmless as cockroaches).
Well, at least everything really became clearer. Thank you for this video and your sense of humor, I really appreciate it 🩶
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P.S. Song "Creepy Girl" (haha) by Jeremy Deprisco
very proud of the currently-growing generation’s ability to take consent seriously
incredibly disturbed by the way some of them have really vocally decided that consent culture applies to literally everything, up to and including other people’s right to literally just exist in a public space
it starts with something like “all nudity is sexual” or “wearing kinky clothes is inherently a sexual act” with the accompanying “since it’s sexual it requires consent from all involved parties, and seeing it is a form of involvement, so you need my consent to go out in public where i might see you” and once you start with that it has historically been – i’m as leery of slippery-slope arguments as anyone else but it *has historically, repeatedly been demonstrated* – a very, very short trip from there to policing gender expressions and etc and you know, we still live in a deeply homophobic and transphobic society, the whole thing where people are trying to make it illegal to exist in public while trans is … a thing, in real life, right now? and your “wearing a collar in public is an act of bondage sex to which i do not consent” bullshit is absolutely 100% in support of the evangelical puritans’ “existing while queer is an offense against god. jesus did not consent to you wearing clothing inconsistent with the gender i believe you should be presenting” i’m sure there are a number of people who KNOW those are the same thing with the same end goals/results and are doing it on purpose; i know that there are in fact bad-faith actors repurposing social justice language in service of oppression, you can watch it happen, see also all the conservatives currently parroting “my body my choice” as they endanger everyone around them during a global pandemic. but i think some of them are just naive and genuinely believe themselves to be both correct and leftist, and like. nope
it wasn’t all that long ago that people were in fact regularly getting arrested for wearing clothing inconsistent with their assumed gender. like it was illegal to cross-dress and the cops would go out and arrest trans women and trans men and butch lesbians and effeminiate gays, because of trans- and homophobia, and wearing the wrong clothes was literally the offense used as an excucse to enforce those -phobias. i am not eager to return to that in any way. you cannot argue that your imagined rules against “sexual clothing” would somehow not be used against trans people because, get this, there ARE people in the world for whom cross-dressing is a sex thing, even though the vast majority of trans people are not doing it for any such reason. if you think it’s acceptable to literally police the actions of everyone based on the fact that there are people who might get off on it, then your beliefs are, in actual practical fact of effect, in support of arresting trans people for failing to conform to gender presentation
"BOY I SAY- I SAY BOY WHAT IN TARNATION WERE YOU THINKING TAKING ON AN ENDBRINGER ALL BY YOUR LONESOME?! SHARP AS WET PAPER YOU ARE AND ABOUT AS USEFUL TOO! THEY CALL YA ARMSMASTER NOW THEY'LL BE CALLING YA ONE-ARMSMASTER, THAT WAS A JOKE BOY YA MISSED IT, WENT RIGHT PAST YA!"
"you're permanently changing your body for your sick fetish" as an argument against transitioning is always funny to me because it's like yeah actually i am doing that too and i love it and i'm allowed to do it because this is my body, it's not the gender thing though i'm trying to get really fat
at this point we can move from "it's not a fetish or mental illness" because transphobes don't believe us or care, get into "why is altering your body for a fetish a bad thing? why shouldn't mentally ill people be allowed bodily autonomy?" bc even other trans people struggle w this sometimes
Day 2 in the Middle School Time Loop: you remember that last time, everyone ignored you at recess because they were talking about a TV show that you hadn’t watched. This time, you lie and say you’ve seen it. They ask you who your favorite character is, and you don’t know any of the characters, and so you’re tongue-tied. They think you’re weirder than ever, or maybe a liar, which is worse (and true).
Day 3 in the Middle School Time Loop: you tell your parents that you feel ill. They let you stay home while they’re at work. You spend the whole day watching past episodes of the TV Show.
Day 4 in the Middle School Time Loop: Recess again. The same person asks you who your favorite character is. This time, you're ready. You eagerly tell them, and supplement your reasons for liking them with solid evidence from all 4 seasons of the show. But! Tough luck: you’re now too invested. The atmosphere turns uncomfortable. They go back to ignoring you like they did on the Day 1 that you didn’t know was Day 1.
Day 5 in the Middle School Time Loop:
invitation.
Robot disabilities. Robot who charges slowly and loses power incredibly fast and is always tired. Robot with malfunctioning lenses and can’t process visual information properly. Robot that can’t process anything too large and at a fast rate or else they’ll shut down. Robot with limbs screwed on too loose/just can’t attach correctly, so if they’re not careful they fall out. Robot disabilities,,,
Robots with cracked screens that they can't afford to fix. Robots with bent limbs. Robots who's cables are wonky and need to be particular about where they sit so they can charge. Robots who's vocal box is messed up so they have to use sign language. Robots who's fans are old and make a lot of noise. Robots who have malfunctioning chips and experience mental illness symptoms since they don't process the world the same as others.
I fucking knew it, I SAID it: they're making ADHD people the next culture war targets. They will 'just ask questions' until we lose every scrap of ground we've gained in the last decade and more. We may not quite inspire the same level of hatred as a sexual minority, but we can very easily be made to inspire disdain and that also works.
They will strip us of our accomodations and our medications and try to stifle any sense of shared identity, and if that kills some of us, oh well. So long as it fuels another outrage cycle, fine.
So many of the tropes they've been using on trans people work extremely well on ADHD people too! "There are too many of these people suddenly! It must be a fad! It spreads through friend groups! And online! People are going private for diagnoses and that's bad! They are using pOwERfUl medical interventions and we think it's freaky!"
I saw the first ripples of this in terf circles about two years ago. And of course it's spread.
6% of British ADHD people lost their jobs in the last year thanks to the meds shortage. SIX PER CENT! And that just made these ghouls go "ooh, tasty, what else can we do?"
Recently an 'expert' was on the BBC saying people see ADHD diagnosis as a "golden ticket." Laurence Fox has been ranting that the condition doesn't exist and threatening "'you won't poison my child's body [with ADHD meds] against my consent"
People need to be aware this is going to get worse. Maybe, if we're lucky, it won't get really bad. But it's going to get worse than it is now.
like okay im just going to be real right now. do some of you not understand that children grow into adults? like seriously. because the way some of yall talk about them makes me feel like you think of children as an entirely different species and not people who in 10 years will be expected to function and understand society. were you cloned? do you come from a tube? did you jump out of the artificial womb as a fully formed 25 year old
It especially bothers me when adults, particularly parents, say fucked up shit to kids because "they won't understand it".
Let's put aside entirely whether they are even right about that particular kid. Or even kids in general. Lets live in this weird world where kids understand nothing.
You do realize their older selves can view the echoes of this memory whenever they want, right? The excuse that they currently cant understand it is bullshit (and often wrong to boot).
The shit said to and about kids matters.
cant have one normal conversation in this city
i think we can all agree it's a bit of a missed opportunity electronics don't have a "milk socket" you could plug some sort of milk battery into, which would slowly disperse milk into the body of the machine, possibly ruining it.
i hate you "pair the spares"/"everyone must be paired" tropes, i hate you forced last minute romances, i hate you implication that a happy ending means a romantic partner, i hate you amatonormativity
My solution for bloatware is this: by law you should hire in every programming team someone who is Like, A Guy who has a crappy laptop with 4GB and an integrated graphics card, no scratch that, 2 GB of RAM, and a rural internet connection. And every time someone in your team proposes to add shit like NPCs with visible pores or ray tracing or all the bloatware that Windows, Adobe, etc. are doing now, they have to come back and try your project in the Guy's laptop and answer to him. He is allowed to insult you and humilliate you if it doesn't work in his laptop, and you should by law apologize and optimize it for him. If you try to put any kind of DRM or permanent internet connection, he is legally allowed to shoot you.
With about 5 or 10 years of that, we will fix the world.
lol some absolute dogshit in the notes
"stop being poor" is not an opinion I thought I would ever see voiced so openly
Do these people really think that games is the only problem? We've created a world where IT is integral to everything. You need to go online to pay your taxes, to get your medical records, to see your bank statements. Where any job requires you to have at least three applications installed so that you can WFH, and they removed desks from the office to force people to work from home because its cheaper for the company. Where to see your child's grade, you need to have a specific app installed that's not compatible with any of your other apps.
These requirements are true no matter if your the CEO living in the middle of manhatten or if you're a poor farmer stuck somewhere near Anna Creek Station and you only get an internet connection when the clouds aren't blocking the sun.
All of which is to say nothing of the fact that the bloat we see in modern applications is completely unnecessary. These are simple, easy fixes. Any developer can solve 80% of it. The only reason we don't is because companies set such unrealistic timelines and are so callous with their IT personnel that they don't even give them enough time to finish the first pass of the product, much less fix its problems. All it needs is an extra month, but these multi-million dollar companies can't be bothered to pay for the bare minimum much less the expected standard.
I don't give a fuck how rich you think you are, there's no excuse for how badly written companies have made their code just because they can't be bothered to pay for the bare basics of optimization as part of their development cycle, just to make it the customer's problem.
Can someone tell me where these feminine trans guys with massive tits who wear push-up bras and skimpy outfits that I keep seeing transphobes complain about are? I’d love to see massive tboy boobs.
