@cryptidwolfe / cryptidwolfe.tumblr.com
Just a reminder my blog is trans inclusive. It’s bi inclusive. It is pan inclusive. It is intersex inclusive. It is ace/asexual inclusive. It is aro/aromantic inclusive. It is queer inclusive.
I don’t support terfs or exclusionists.
If you came here looking for an ally in your bigotry you came to the wrong blog. Go away. You are not welcome here.
hater of socks
I think the most fun part of monsters inc is boo calling sulley “kitty” and mike wazowski by full government name
Today's Seal Is: Caterpillar
Part 2 of whatever the hell this meme is
what can I say? My thirst has been quenched. Gatorade, you’ve done it again
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A M A Z I N G
A 28-year-old motorcyclist died in Washington State on Friday afternoon because a dipshit Tesla driver rear-ended him at speed. A Snohomish man, 56, was commuting in his 2022 Tesla Model S when he activated the car’s camera-based advanced driver assist system and according to his statements to police, began looking through his phone. With nobody paying attention to the car’s actions, the Tesla software ignored Jeffrey Nissen on his motorcycle and continued on at speed. The car rear-ended the two-wheeler, Nissen was flung from the bike, and his life ended pinned underneath the electric car, where he was still lodged when police arrived to the scene.
Tesla claims another life.
Reminder that even if you are personally aware of how dangerous Tesla vehicles are and vow to never ride in one, they can still kill you.
My own driving habits have changed around them. I always give Teslas extra space, avoid following them directly, and expect them to stop or swerve suddenly without notice.
Cannot count the times I've pulled up next to a Tesla at freeway speed, noticed the driver playing on their phone. Tap the horn. They look up with surprise.
Please, don't be that guy.
hope this is okay to add but Jeffrey’s family has created a gofundme to cover funeral expenses and other costs.
3 seconds into dungeon meshi and they’re already living my dream. i love eating things I ought not in unfamiliar ecosystems
one time in undergrad we went to this big farm & greenhouse where they were cultivating rare & endangered plants and during the tour the botanist let us all taste a leaf off of a particular plant & I was like oh some of these are edible!
so we got to the next plant and when he took questions I asked if it was also edible and he said “I mean. It’s not poisonous, but I’m sure it won’t taste good.” I asked if I could try it anyway and it seemed like he was just perplexed enough to indulge me so he gave me one leaf. It was terrible.
At the next plant he offered me a leaf before I asked and he wanted to know what it tasted like
For the rest of the tour he gave me a leaf from each non-poisonous plant and I told him how they all tasted (mostly like nothing at all but some unspeakably terrible) and that’s how I ate several dozen rare & endangered leaves.
So anyway. I’m a fan of this blonde guy already. I think we’d be friends
Imagine being a guy with a silly name like Barry Bluejeans, and needing to impart a dire and ominous warning to your friends who don't remember you, so for a variety of reasons, you conceal your identity as Barry Bluejeans and don the appearance of an absolutely terrifying hooded figure. And yet, your friends are still incapable of taking your cryptic monologues seriously without making a dick joke or something, every goddamn time. How would you even manage to stay in character.
forum > help
>hey guys im experiencing this problem running my game
>same here
>same here
>same here
>same here
>same here
>same here
>same here
>same here
>same here
>same here
>same here
>same here
>same here
thread closed
>“nvm fixed it” >“hey i got this same problem, can you tell me how you managed to make it work?” >“sure I pm’d you the fix” last reply: August 3 2002
This is so true it’s painful
all goofing aside I genuinely don't understand the urge to reimagine Taylor Allison Swift as a secretly queer icon when the pop music scene(TM) is like. literally overflowing with women who actually like women. Gaga and Kesha and Miley and Halsey are right there. Rina Sawayama and Hayley Kiyoko and Rebecca Black and Kehlani and Victoria Monét and Miya Folick if you're willing to get slightly less top 100. Janelle and Demi for them nonbinary takes on liking girls. like what are we doing here. like I'm not even saying you can't enjoy Taylor but why would you hang all your little gay hopes on her.
Isn’t Lady Gaga bisexual?
yes that is indeed why she's on the list of famous women who like women
why have multiple people reblogged this with some horse-assed "um actually most of these people are bi or pan" did I fucking stutter I said they like girls. what is your point. I'm going to kill you.
the icon is because of this post
POV: you make a good post and then encounter tumblr reading comprehension
btw to just clarify for anyone who sees this reblog of this post
op is basically saying something along the lines of "yea ik taylor swift is bi but like. why is she y'all's only lgbtq+ pop icon when there are all these other lgbtq+ people in the pop scene???"
i might have worded this badly but hopefully i got the main point across
hi op here I certainly did not fucking say Taylor Swift is bi
Op is saying that liking Taylor for being QUEER or Lgbtqia+ is not a bad thing, but to also know she is not the only one.
He did not call anyone in the original post lesbian bi or pan.
He did call two people NB
you have to be fucking with me there's no way
op: carrots are not fruits. raspberries and apples and blueberries and pears and lingonberries are fruits. i’m not saying you can’t enjoy carrots but why would you hang all your fruitsalad hopes on it
idiot 1: aren’t raspberries berries?
op: yes that is indeed why it’s on the list of fruit
op: why have multiple people reblogged this with “umm actually most of these are berries”. did i fucking stutter i said they’re fruits. i’m going to kill you
idiot 2: btw just to clarify op is saying “yeah i know carrots are a fruit but there are other fruits too”
op: where in the sweet mary mother of cunt did i say that carrots were a fruit
idiot 3: op is saying that liking carrots for being fruits isn’t a bad thing, but to also know they are not the only fruit
op:
thanks for making me pink and purple those are two of my favorite colors :3
my girlfriend and I saw you from across the bar and we fucking hate your vibe. we are going to kill you.
Midnight Moths and Flames - Submitted by @clown-prince-of-gay
#F6EDCE #C2B27F #81713F #472A3D #472551 #391449
Well out of the blue I just remembered today the time I accidentally joined the cast of a production of The Princess Bride….in the middle of the production.
And you’re gonna just leave us there
I mean, if you guys wanna hear the story, it is a pretty fun one
Okay, so this is what happened,
Some years ago (6? 7 years ago, I think?) there was a pirate exhibit at the state museum. We had actual artifacts from the Queen Anne’s Revenge, creepy wax dummies, historical costumes etc, it was awesome.
I was really into Pirates of the Caribbean at the time, because I played the mmorpg with some high school friends of mine (and some of their parents sometimes, who also got addicted to it), so of course when they announced “Pirate Night at the Museum”, in which visitors were encouraged to dress up, I was over the moon. So I’m there with my friends, my parents, and my sisters, running around the exhibits after the museum is technically closed.
They replaced the creepy wax dummies with people in costume at this point, and it was pretty epic.
The highlight of the night would be a showing of The Princess Bride. The movie would play on the big screen while actors would be on a stage below, acting the whole thing out word for word and shot for shot as it happened. Any audience members who knew lines were encouraged to shout them out as they heard them.
Here’s the thing. My parents love that movie. Like you don’t understand they were quoting it to us in its entirety when we were still in highchairs. I could reenact the battle of wits scene before I ever actually watched it. So my family sits in the front row, behind the railing, quoting everything right along with the actors and film.
And then comes the part in the Pit of Despair with the Albino. And the cast didn’t have anyone on the stage with Wesley. I don’t know if the Albino couldn’t make it that night, or if they’d never cast him, but it was really weird to see Wesley just lying on the stage awkwardly while the Albino is supposed to be treating his injuries.
I started twitching. My mom and sister look at me and they’re like “do it.” And one of the ushers is like “you know the part? do it”
So I launch over the railing, run up onto the stage, and take over from there, doing my best impression of the character. Being that I was a 5′2″ blonde girl in a corset and puffy sleeves, Wesley had some trouble keeping a straight face.
Then they got to the scene with Humperdink telling the guard to clear out the Thieves’ Forest, and…they didn’t have the guard either. So my twin sister up in the audience is like “hang on, I got this” and then she launches over the railing to make sure Humperdink isn’t just sitting awkwardly talking to thin air.
This meant that yes, I got bopped on the noggin by Fezzik, and yes, my sister got to do the “Give us the key.” “What key?” “Fezzik, tear his arms off.” “Oh, you mean this key!”
They made up stay on stage and take a bow with the cast when it was over, it was hilarious. Then the next year, since they still had the exhibit, the museum called my sister and was like, “So….that was super fun last year. Do you and your sister want to be audience plants and do it again this year?”
The answer, naturally, was heck yes. Since we had new volunteers playing Count Rugen and Inigo this time, this also led to my sister actually choreographing their fight scene herself. Which was awesome.
My favorite part is that this is entirely in tone for Princess Bride.
